Sad

[BookstoreEscapee]

We have family friends that we used to live across the street from when I was a baby (we moved when I was 2 but my parents stayed friends with them all these years). The kids are about the same age as my brother and me, the parents are in my parents' age range. When we were little we called them "Auntie M***" and "Uncle G***."

M has been undergoing treatment for colon cancer for the past few years. A few months ago she had surgery, during which they found a tumor near her spine, which they couldn't operate on. They basically told her to live her life, etc. She's been doing relatively OK, for the most part. A couple weeks ago they were supposed to go to Germany for some kind of treatment that she couldn't get here. Her husband wanted her to do this. But she ended up in the hospital the week before they were supposed to leave. She's been there the last few weeks, dealing with a blood infection among other things.

They had been debating yesterday if she should get a feeding tube and stuff in the hospital, or if she should go into hospice care. This morning my dad emailed me and my brother to tell us it was decided that she would be moved to hospice (at home). Their younger son had been leaning toward hospice, and apparently their older son was as well. She said the pain and everything was too much, and she wants this, and G will do what she wants. When I got home my dad was on instant messenger and he said that she is staying in the hospital because they can't do the IV medication at home, but she'll be moved to a larger room so she can have family around. Probably not until next week due to some problem (I don't know what).

So I don't know how much time she has left, but it doesn't sound like much.

[tropicsgoddess]

Sorry to hear that.

[RavenStarr]

I am so sorry

You said she was suppose to go to Germany, but had to be in the hospital. Is it still planned for her to go?

I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers.

[BookstoreEscapee]

No, she won't be able to go to Germany (barring some kind of miracle).

Plus, the tickets are non-refundable and non-transferable, which sucks (though they have a year to use them). Seems like medical excuses aren't good enough for the airlines anymore, according to what my dad said. Their daughter-in-law is from Germany, so if he could transfer the tickets she and their son could at least use them to visit her family at some point (and they just had twin girls in November). Now they'll just go to waste.

As far as I know they haven't given her a time frame...sometimes people are in hospice for months, so I guess you never know. Hopefully she'll have some time still.

[Becks]

*oodles of hugs*

[BookstoreEscapee]

She was moved to hospice today. She's getting pain meds (morphine on demand, basically); can't keep food down but she's able to take small sips of some kind of protein drink. But they said the dog can come to visit (he just needs proof of shots and stuff, so he can't go 'til next week at least). The dog is actually at my parents' house since his daddy is spending most of his time at the hospital. The cats are not too thrilled.

Gonna go with my mom tomorrow and visit.

I hate hospitals.

[Amina516]

Im sorry BSE. At least shes comfortable now and hopefully her passing is peaceful (if it happens at all.) Some patients actually are discharged to home from hospice.

If it makes ya feel better, Hospice' are usually more user friendly than hospitals. They try to make it a homey, peaceful place to pass in.

[Der Cute]

BSE, I'm sorry.

Hugs and bonks from my kitties. I haven't had a human friend leave, but a cat friend..that was bad enough, seeing her sick and sad and unhappy. Let's hope your friend has a peaceful, painless time in the Hospice care.

Cutenoob

[El Pollo Guerrera]

Prayers and best wishes out to her and her family.

[RootedPhoenix]

*offers chocolate and hugs*

[JustaCashier]

Sending good thoughts to you, and your friend's family, B E.

Mike

[BookstoreEscapee]

Thanks for the hugs, everyone.

Im sorry BSE. At least shes comfortable now and hopefully her passing is peaceful (if it happens at all.) Some patients actually are discharged to home from hospice.

If it makes ya feel better, Hospice' are usually more user friendly than hospitals. They try to make it a homey, peaceful place to pass in.

Saw her on Saturday. She dozed off a few times, but when she's awake she's quite lucid, chatting, watching TV, etc. (A couple weeks ago she had a blood infection and was totally out of it from the high fever; told my mom she made sandwiches and offered to make her tea.) She said the pain isn't too bad; it's the nausea that's really bothering her. Don't know if that's from the morphine or what. But when they move her (her husband and the aide shifted her up in the bed at one point, and later he helped her sit up because she was feeling sick), she's in pain.

She actually is in the hospital (they were going to set up hospice care at their house but they can't do the IV drugs there - it's the machine where she can press a button and get a booster shot every X minutes), in the oncology wing, but she has a private room, with two armchairs that fold out into beds so her husband and/or kids can stay with her, and they have quiet hours (a couple hours in the afternoon and all night). It's a small section with a lounge area at the end of the hall, with a wall of windows looking onto the river behind the hospital (she has a view from her window, too). Her guests can even order food from the hospital kitchen and have it delivered to the room.

BSE, I'm sorry.

Hugs and bonks from my kitties. I haven't had a human friend leave, but a cat friend..that was bad enough, seeing her sick and sad and unhappy. Let's hope your friend has a peaceful, painless time in the Hospice care.

Cutenoob

The only people I've lost have been grandparents (and pets...only one of which I was present for at the very end), and I've never visited anyone in hospice before. I visited my grandparents in the hospital before their deaths (my dad's father had a stroke when I was 12 [he actually died from pneumonia], and his mother died of pneumonia when I was 25), but it wasn't like we were going there knowing they weren't likely to ever come out (though we knew it was a possibility, I suppose). It's different knowing the person is basically planning to die there. This is also the first of my parents' generation (though one of my college friends lost her dad shortly before Christmas; I didn't see him, though). It's so strange how being so sick makes a person look so small. She's a pretty tiny lady to begin with, but she hardly looks like herself. (Thought the same about my grandfather when I saw him in the hospital bed. I was 12, then...I didn't handle that too well at the time. But he hugged me before I left and I was quite surprised by how strong his hug was. I still remember it clearly.)

[BookstoreEscapee]

She passed away this morning at 4:45 am. Her husband was with her.