Good Thoughts....

[AdminAssistant]

Fiance had yet another phone interview yesterday. They called him today to say he didn't get the job, then he came home to get a rejection e-mail from another place. He's getting very frustrated, as am I, but he's really taking it personally and blaming himself.

Oh, background, he lives in another state and is trying to move up here with me. The job market is not cooperating.

The distance has gotten really tough for both of us. I've been an absolute basketcase this semester...procrastinating, not wanting to do any work, feeling listless.... I don't want to say that his moving here would magically solve all of my problems (it wouldn't) but damn if it wouldn't make things more tolerable. I just want to be with my Fiance, is that so damn much to ask?

[Amina516]

Good thoughts for you and Fiance! Of course thats not to much to ask, that the 2 of you be together.

I wish him Good Luck with his search!

[AdminAssistant]

Annndddd....today's another sucky day.

I gave a presentation in the class I TA (this was the big lecture), and the professor said that I seemed really nervous and that it's a habitual problem that I have, and spent about 10 minutes talking with me about preparation and confidence...even saying that it's probably a cultural thing (partially true).

All of which had the opposite effect as intended, because now I feel even worse about myself than before. Whatever academic confidence I walked into this Ph.D. program with has slowly fluttered away under piles of theory I don't understand and history that I can't remember.

Why did I sign up for this again?

[Solumina]

Hey, don't get down on yourself, you're awesome. Just try to focus on the positive (I know it's a lot easier to say than to do) and do the best that you can, you woudn't be a TA if you didn't know what you are doing, you just need a little work on giving a presentation, which is something that most people suck at anyway, so you're still miles above average.