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The bugs are coming back to life, breeding, and travelling from the park to my apartment.
Today, there was a giant black spider in my apartment.
I was putting on makeup, I have to tippy toe a tad when I do my eye makeup because my mirror is a tad too high for me, and I saw something black out of the corner of my eyes. It was a giant black spider, coming down from the ceiling.
Even people who aren't afraid or freaked out by spiders know that it's just damn CREEPY when they do that.
Because he was against the wall, I couldn't grab a lighter and set him on fire. So I grabbed my hairspray and sprayed until he was stuck to the wall.
Then I took a bottle of shampoo and whacked him.
Then I took a tissue and wadded him up. And put him in the toilet.
He was still kicking. Fucker.
Then at the first gas station, there was the angry old man who line jumped to ask a stupid question. (see Sightings).
Then there was awful late morning traffic and road construction I'd forgotten about because I haven't really left my place much this week.
Then there was the awful clerk at the second gas station I went to (same thread in Sightings).
When I was leaving to go back home and got on the freeway, no sooner had I merged, some idiot in a truck had a bunch of empty cardboard boxes in the bed of the truck, unsecured.
Two of them bounced, went up, up, out of the bed, and landed just ahead of me.
About 20 miles later, there was a tanker truck going only about 55 mph, so I went to pass him.
I don't know if it was because it was windy, he was falling asleep, or just being an asshole, but he would not stay on his own side of the road. And yes, right before I went to overtake him, I saw that mammoth of a tanker wiggle and sway.
I ended up having to go in the rumble strips, not good for your tires, so loud and obnoxious, and he was still pretty close to me. I think I peed a few drops.
A few miles later, there's a slow moving semi truck. Now, before me, some other vehicles had all scrambled to get around him, I would be the last in the string to go around him.
Right as I got ahead of him, he must have decided he didn't want to be passed anymore. He gave it a little juice and stayed neck and neck with me, even though I had nearly passed him without having to put any gas on (I was on cruise control as it was).
I just hit my + button and added a few mph and I was able to get around him. I got a healthy distance ahead before I went back into the right lane.
There was a FedEx truck that I passed not too long after that, and I took a look in my rear view mirror and now that semi was going faster and had just started to overtake the FedEx truck.
He stayed behind me the rest of the way on the freeway, but I was just waiting for him to put it in the next gear and just come roaring up my ass.
I got off the freeway and started on a country road back home. Unbeknowngst to me, some piece of UGLY newer Chevy crossover type SUVthing had either gotten off the freeway with me or had been on the same backroad, because soon it was on my ass. I don't know where it came from, I would have noticed it before because it was red.
It tailgated me. Great.
I was already going 55 in a 45 as we got into town. So I slowed down. They did not let up. They followed me past the mirrals (sp?) and to the first set of lights, stayed attached to my bumper at the RED light that I turned red on (I stopped and looked, they just followed me).
They followed me past the railroad tressle, and that's where I decided I was going to try to lose them and take a different way to my parents' house, sort of going back OUT of town but not quite.
Wouldn't you know it.....they turned right with me. And stayed right on my ass.
There came this tricky intersection where no one stops, but it's an uphill right turn to go towards my parents' house, so I took a chance and dove right to see if they'd still follow me. Thankfully, they stayed straight. Thank GOD.
Then there was a girl walking her dog in the middle of the road by the cement place and the sandpits.
When I left to go home for the night, I managed to crush a cigarette while I was digging for my lighter in my purse.
And I got one more tailgater when I was just blocks from home.
Today, there was a giant black spider in my apartment.
I was putting on makeup, I have to tippy toe a tad when I do my eye makeup because my mirror is a tad too high for me, and I saw something black out of the corner of my eyes. It was a giant black spider, coming down from the ceiling.
Even people who aren't afraid or freaked out by spiders know that it's just damn CREEPY when they do that.
Because he was against the wall, I couldn't grab a lighter and set him on fire. So I grabbed my hairspray and sprayed until he was stuck to the wall.
Then I took a bottle of shampoo and whacked him.
Then I took a tissue and wadded him up. And put him in the toilet.
He was still kicking. Fucker.
Then at the first gas station, there was the angry old man who line jumped to ask a stupid question. (see Sightings).
Then there was awful late morning traffic and road construction I'd forgotten about because I haven't really left my place much this week.
Then there was the awful clerk at the second gas station I went to (same thread in Sightings).
When I was leaving to go back home and got on the freeway, no sooner had I merged, some idiot in a truck had a bunch of empty cardboard boxes in the bed of the truck, unsecured.
Two of them bounced, went up, up, out of the bed, and landed just ahead of me.
About 20 miles later, there was a tanker truck going only about 55 mph, so I went to pass him.
I don't know if it was because it was windy, he was falling asleep, or just being an asshole, but he would not stay on his own side of the road. And yes, right before I went to overtake him, I saw that mammoth of a tanker wiggle and sway.
I ended up having to go in the rumble strips, not good for your tires, so loud and obnoxious, and he was still pretty close to me. I think I peed a few drops.
A few miles later, there's a slow moving semi truck. Now, before me, some other vehicles had all scrambled to get around him, I would be the last in the string to go around him.
Right as I got ahead of him, he must have decided he didn't want to be passed anymore. He gave it a little juice and stayed neck and neck with me, even though I had nearly passed him without having to put any gas on (I was on cruise control as it was).
I just hit my + button and added a few mph and I was able to get around him. I got a healthy distance ahead before I went back into the right lane.
There was a FedEx truck that I passed not too long after that, and I took a look in my rear view mirror and now that semi was going faster and had just started to overtake the FedEx truck.
He stayed behind me the rest of the way on the freeway, but I was just waiting for him to put it in the next gear and just come roaring up my ass.
I got off the freeway and started on a country road back home. Unbeknowngst to me, some piece of UGLY newer Chevy crossover type SUVthing had either gotten off the freeway with me or had been on the same backroad, because soon it was on my ass. I don't know where it came from, I would have noticed it before because it was red.
It tailgated me. Great.
I was already going 55 in a 45 as we got into town. So I slowed down. They did not let up. They followed me past the mirrals (sp?) and to the first set of lights, stayed attached to my bumper at the RED light that I turned red on (I stopped and looked, they just followed me).
They followed me past the railroad tressle, and that's where I decided I was going to try to lose them and take a different way to my parents' house, sort of going back OUT of town but not quite.
Wouldn't you know it.....they turned right with me. And stayed right on my ass.
There came this tricky intersection where no one stops, but it's an uphill right turn to go towards my parents' house, so I took a chance and dove right to see if they'd still follow me. Thankfully, they stayed straight. Thank GOD.
Then there was a girl walking her dog in the middle of the road by the cement place and the sandpits.
When I left to go home for the night, I managed to crush a cigarette while I was digging for my lighter in my purse.
And I got one more tailgater when I was just blocks from home.
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