Why I Hate Kids

[AnaKhouri]

So, I knew that having a kid didn't make me like other people's kids any better than I did before. But lately I've actively started hating other people's children. Khan drives me nuts sometimes, but he never does anything out of spite or malice. He shares with everyone and never snatches (he even gives kids with no toys his own toys, leaving himself with none). He doesn't hit or bite or shove. If other kids grab his stuff, he doesn't even try to get it back. He tells other kids "Good job!" He's already at least 3 feet tall so I have a feeling he's going to be one of the gentle giants.

But other people's little brats have done all these thing to him. At the library the other day, this kid just cold bit him in the arm. No provocation. They were just playing with blocks when out of nowhere this little beast sinks his teeth into Khan's arm. Khan looked at me, held out his arm and whimpered. Of course there was no parent to be seen (90% of the time there isn't), putting me in the position of teaching their stupid kids how to act in public. I took my son away, gave him half the blocks, and told the other kid, "NO. We. Do. Not. Bite. Khan, you don't have to play with someone who bites." Yesterday at a train table Khan went to take a train from the roundhouse when this brat comes screaming from the other end of the table, howling "THAT'S MINE! I was playing with it!" and SHOVES Khan to the floor. I told him, "No, you were not. It's his turn to use it. Come on, Khan. We don't have to play with people who don't share." It sounds passive-aggressive, but my first instinct was to put these kids in a headlock, so being PA was probably a better tactic.

The worst part is, most of these monsters are older than Khan, at least 4-5 or even older (the biter was younger though). I know toddlers usually have a MINE stage, but these kids are old enough to know better. And they are just nasty about it, sullen, spiteful and malicious. When I was their age I wouldn't have wanted to play with a baby either, but I would have left, not bullied a smaller, younger child.

Is my kid an angel? No. But he's nothing like these little monsters. I'm not even sure I want to see their parents, it might be too depressing.

[Amina516]

I have to kinda agree with you there. Its frustrating to know the values you try to instill in your own child and then seeing one where no one bothers with the kid, who goes on to do terrible things with or without supervision.

Im sorry. I can assure you though, some kids still exist with manners...mine are some.

[TowelKing]

I share the sentiment (partly). I don't have kids of my own (?) but I am infuriated by many people's kids--hell, if me now knew me 15 years ago, I probably would have hated the little fucker!

It all boils down to the competency of the mother-in most cases, the parent responsible for instilling good moral values and manners-to teach her children with a modicum of awareness regarding other people.
It has not deterred me from having children-I love the little guys when well behaved-but I refuse to spend time around even friends with horrible children.

[zombiequeen]

OH my. This is why I'm terrified to have kids, even though hubby assures me they will be well behaved and nice. I mean, I behaved in public even if my parents weren't around, but that's because it was beaten into my head that if you misbehaved, mum would find out somehow and you would be severely punished for it later.
Your Khan sounds like the model kid though, some of the little kiddles I teach in sunday school aren't as well behaved. You seem to be a good mum!

[monolayth]

Your toddler sounds like mine. I am in agreement about this.

[Moirae]

I'm not a mother but I know how you feel. I don't like 99% of children in the first place, but if they are being mean to my nephew, I want to smack them silly. He's such a very good little boy. He shares, he's polite, he helps his mom around the house, and my sister just told me that he got all A's and B's on his report card and won the class citizenship award for the third year in a row. And he's only going to turn 8 on Sep 29.

He's not even mine but I'm soooo proud of him, and of the job my wonderful sister is doing with him. She's a very very good mother who taught him how to behave properly. He even says please and thank you.

But other peoples kids? Most of them are sooooo annoying.

[AdminAssistant]

I know how you feel. I went to my nephew's 6th b-day party not long ago, and there was this....child, who was so annoying. Every time he would open the present the kid would be like, "Oh, I already have that." The next night, I was staying at Sis's house, and the same kid was over with his parents (good friends of Sis and BIL). The little brat was being such a nuisance, and kept messing with the Lego sets that me and Nephew had put together earlier in the day. Rearranging pieces, breaking off pieces, ugh. Sis didn't say anything except, "Now share and play nice." But I sat down with Nephew after they left and made sure everything was put back together right. Nephew is no angel (he is a rambunctious 6 year old boy, after all) but he's generally a good kid and I can tell that he's a bit like me. Mom's always said I was 'soft-hearted' meaning, a little too sensitive, a little too sympathetic. His feelings get hurt easily. :/

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I'm right there with you. I don't dislike other people's children, but know I've been pretty put out with other children's PARENTS for raising such ill mannered kids.

My mom was shocked when we went out to a playground once and I had to get tough with some little angels we encountered there. She couldn't believe some of the bad behavior. It's been a while since she's had little ones of her own, I suppose. I told her, "Mom, this is not the exception, it's the rule. That kid I had to call down? He's at just about every playground I"ve ever been at."

She was shocked.

[dragon_wings]

I usually can take kids in small doses. I see such terrors though at my job and on my street. I can tolerate my niece and nephew for longer but still the threshold is low. I just don't like kids. Even if some are adorable.

The weirdest thing is that they *love* me. I've worked floor shifts before where a little kid will see me and want to stay near me (going so far and to grab on to my leg and not let go) and have to be physically removed from my personal space by a parent. This even affects the little sibling of a coworker and both of my SM's daughters (the oldest is 13).

[Squeaksmyalias]

The weirdest thing is that they *love* me. I've worked floor shifts before where a little kid will see me and want to stay near me (going so far and to grab on to my leg and not let go) and have to be physically removed from my personal space by a parent. This even affects the little sibling of a coworker and both of my SM's daughters (the oldest is 13).

I have that problem too! Couple weekends back at a faire I had a little girl practically sit in my lap when I was trying to take pictures of a show. Plus a couple other kids were sitting with me too. It was large bleacher, completely empty except for me and I had five kids from toddler age up until maybe 6 or 7 sitting thisclosetome . I finally had to explain to the one in my lap that I couldn't take pictures with her there, and that she had to sit by herself. I looked around for parents and couldn't figure out who was who. So I finally just climbed over the kids and jumped off and found a different spot to shoot at. I wasn't going to get in trouble for having strange kids practically cuddle up to me (wtf ), or some how be responsible or feel guilty if one fell off the bleachers. I did tell them to sit here and wait for Mommy and Daddy, I didn't want them to follow me. My tolerance for kids can be pretty short, I can play and have fun with them (they have fun toys) and hang out if they are my friends kids. I'll wave and smile if they are cute, sometimes squeal if one is especially adorable but I dislike being a magnet for tiny humans. Being the nice lady with the camera seems to make me even more of one now. Sigh.

[Mishi]

*Sighs* I wish we could have a CS playgroup in real life, it would be awesome!
Everyone here seems to have the same idea about how kids should behave, and it seems like there are a few kids around the same age. Jazzy has other kids try to take things off her, but she tends to stand her ground (politely) and they leave her alone. Bubbles is going through the "MINE!!" stage and I'm hovering more than I usually would, just so that I can nip any nonsense in the bud. She's getting better though, she's not yelling at people for being too close to me anymore.

I don't like whiny kids, they really bug me.

@Squeaks and Dragon_Wings: I can be dressed head-to-toe in black, with stompy boots and a spiky belt, and I still get swarmed!

[Jester]

I'm an uncle. I'm not a father. There's a reason for this.

I told him, "No, you were not. It's his turn to use it. Come on, Khan. We don't have to play with people who don't share." It sounds passive-aggressive, but my first instinct was to put these kids in a headlock, so being PA was probably a better tactic.

This is not passive-aggressive. This is something else entirely. It's called "parenting," something the little fucker's own parents should have been doing in the first place. The only way it's at all passive-aggressive is that you said it to your child in front of the other child, rather than directly to the other child, but the meaning was made very pointedly, so I'd say that is not passive-aggressive so much as it is snide. And in this case, snide was very much called for.

I behaved in public even if my parents weren't around, but that's because it was beaten into my head that if you misbehaved, mum would find out somehow and you would be severely punished for it later.

And something tells me that that is how you are going to keep your own children in line!

This is basically the way my parents taught us, and at least two of us (there are three) came out okay and behaved most of the time in public. (Don't get me started on my older sister, okay?)

I dislike being a magnet for tiny humans. Being the nice lady with the camera seems to make me even more of one now. Sigh.

Try being a magician. I was always good with kids before I started plying this trade, but now? It's ridiculous.

[Squeaksmyalias]

Try being a magician. I was always good with kids before I started plying this trade, but now? It's ridiculous.

My bosses from the faire want to hire me for another event they run, where I would be in costume (either a pixie or elf like creature, really any excuse to pick on me for being short ). I said have you seen the kids practically stalking me at the faire? Yea it's going to be even worse if I'm in costume. They don't believe me, just to prove a point in the fall there is one day I will be in costume, there is a bet going that I will be swarmed not long after opening gate. I had several days this spring where every time I turned around I'd have at least three kids there, or as soon as I was spotted kids would come running to pose for me. The lead photographer is completely confused by this. Since in his 14 years of photographing there, has never had that happen to him.

[XCashier]

Khan drives me nuts sometimes, but he never does anything out of spite or malice. He shares with everyone and never snatches (he even gives kids with no toys his own toys, leaving himself with none). He doesn't hit or bite or shove. If other kids grab his stuff, he doesn't even try to get it back. He tells other kids "Good job!" He's already at least 3 feet tall so I have a feeling he's going to be one of the gentle giants.

You just described my son. Although mine is older than yours (he's nine), our kids would probably get along quite well. My son's always been taught to be gentle with younger/smaller kids, to share toys and be considerate of others, and he's quite good about that. We've got him in a private school that reinforces these values, so most of the time, his playmates are much the same way. I haven't seen too many aggressive bullies towards him (probably because he's the tallest kid of his age!) but I would step in much like you did if some brat starts in on him.

It is sad, isn't it, how we try to teach our children right from wrong, and so many other parents can't be bothered to?