Surefire Way to Piss a Mother Off

[Seshat]

My advice really boils down to:

Police.

Counselling.

Many, many cuddles and reassurances for your daughter.

[morgana]

And can you let us know which areas of the country to avoid while you're going nuclear?

Fuck that. I want to come help kick some ass!

I have to agree with the idea of going to the police. Especially since apparently no one at the school has, yet. That pisses me off almost as much as the incident itself.

Almost.

Give sweetling a from me, if you think it would help.

[MoonCat]

Holy freaking hell. This makes the top of my head blow off.

Everybody else has given good advice. Good luck and lots of hugs to you and your daughter!

[tropicsgoddess]

Oh. My. GAWD! That assistant should be FIRED and arrested for dereliction of her duties! I hope your daughter is holding up okay.

[fireheart]

I'll agree that the boy has definitely been told how to "act" in this situation. I was marked as gifted around that age, but there was NO way in hell I would have used "Definitely not".

The teachers aide: Definitely agree on her being fired. You do not ignore something like this. EVER.

Child Seraph: Love, cuddles and if she has any, time with friends as well. While family is important, as long as she has her friends, she can at least feel "normal" I guess. Counselling would also be beneficial.

[Eisa]

My face looked like this, reading the OP: I have chills right now.

That is mind-bendingly awful that the monitor didn't fucking report it. And "not again?!" What is this shit?!

That young, it's almost undoubted he learned it from somewhere. Still doesn't give him the right to act that way.

Please give your daughter loads of cuddles and reassurance...I can't believe the school interviewed her like that...way to be sensitive to what she's feeling there, guys...

[Amanita]

Holy crap..Like some of the others, I have to wonder where that other kid got the idea in the first place, if he too is being abused, or exposed to things he shouldn't be. Kids don't come up with these things on their own, and the way he allegedly acted when interviewed raises even more red flags.

[lupo pazzesco]

I'm...really really glad my boyfriend is here with me and not in his city right now, easier to prevent him from grabbing the weaponry collection and heading out to "help rectify the matter"

I think, even if the police aren't called by the school, a specialist/counselor should be found to talk to your daughter, but that's just my opinion. They were hammering at her, and I'm sure none of them were qualified, and as stated above, they're no doubt making her feel like this is HER fault. Especially doesn't help that she came home and straight out told you SHE was the one "in trouble".

An outside specialist will also lend credence and support the findings, since the school seems to be in full on "cover my ass" mode. Especially with the "not again" comment from the teache.r

I don't know what pisses me off more right now. the fact it's happened before. The fact the aide, teacher and principal have done NOTHING. Or the fact that they all felt they needed to talk to your daughter WITHOUT you present, and with no one trained to talk to child victims present. WTF, people!?!

Dammit, now I have to go cook something... >.<

[Dreamstalker]

Never has my brain bluescreened as hard as it did just now.

Not AGAIN?! So the school knew about this pervlet and did nothing? It seems like they're taking the 'kids will be kids, they're curious' stance...which this is WAY beyond. You need to nail them to the wall with rusty staples.

Police. Now.

It's clear the school don't want to do anything useful; the fact that they talked to your daughter 'improperly' might bite them in the ass as well.

*sends cuddles and a huge plush wolf to daughter and hugs to Seraph*

Kids don't come up with these things on their own, and the way he allegedly acted when interviewed raises even more red flags.

The fact that the school didn't notice this was unusual is an even bigger (if that's even possible) red flag.

[XCashier]

I think, even if the police aren't called by the school, a specialist/counselor should be found to talk to your daughter, but that's just my opinion. They were hammering at her, and I'm sure none of them were qualified, and as stated above, they're no doubt making her feel like this is HER fault. Especially doesn't help that she came home and straight out told you SHE was the one "in trouble".

An outside specialist will also lend credence and support the findings, since the school seems to be in full on "cover my ass" mode. Especially with the "not again" comment from the teache.r

Agreed, every bit of the school's action stinks of "cover our ass". I agree with notifying the police and getting a good, qualified counselor to help you and your daughter. If the police don't know about this, the school will continue to cover up and how many children will be hurt by this kid? Not to mention the kid needs to be treated now, before he grows up to be something worse.

to you and your daughter. This whole situation is just heartbreaking.

[Zellie Crescent]

I completly agree that the school has just been trying to cover their ass, get the police on this NOW!

[Der Cute]

Hooooollleeeee Fucking Shit.
Honey, I would have gone postal after the 2nd step of "TA not handling it well". Kudos to you for being mature and fair.
I agree with what's been said so far - contact the sexual victims/police. Today. NAO.
But hugs to both of you, and Child Seraph from me: Honey. You did NOTHING wrong. This is very sad, and that is VERY WRONG of him. VERY. Now big hugs, and I promise this boy's going to have a lot more than a time out.

[crazyofficeclerk]

In defense of the school, even though teachers are mandated reporters, there is usually a path that has to be followed before CPS can be called. The last school I worked at we were told that we were NEVER to call CPS without first talking to the principal and the guidance counselor first. Then they would talk to the student and then they would go talk to the superintendent. Then a decision would be made whether or not to call CPS.

If a teacher or aide would go around this "chain" there was a high chance that they could be disciplined (read fired). After being fired, the chance of them getting another job with this on their record would be small. Just like any workplace there is lots of politics that goes on behind the scene that a lot of people aren't aware of. Sadly, stuff like this happens more than most people know.

My advice is to make sure that your daughter is very much aware that she did nothing wrong. Keep repeating that over and over.

[fireheart]

In defense of the school, even though teachers are mandated reporters, there is usually a path that has to be followed before CPS can be called. The last school I worked at we were told that we were NEVER to call CPS without first talking to the principal and the guidance counselor first. Then they would talk to the student and then they would go talk to the superintendent. Then a decision would be made whether or not to call CPS.

My advice is to make sure that your daughter is very much aware that she did nothing wrong. Keep repeating that over and over.

I do believe that "mandatory reporting" requires you to go straight to CPS, do not pass Go, do not collect $200.

But yes, agree. She did nothing wrong and she needs to be very much made aware of that.

[SpaceCore]

Working in schools myself, nothing makes me angrier than this. I can't even imagine how you feel right now Seraph. You do what you have to to protect your daughter and make her feel safe.

I can't vouch for their accuracy, but this site has details on each state's mandatory reporting laws.
Gotta say, I'm happy to see my state's stance is "Anyone who knowingly fails to report shall be guilty of a misdemeanor." And they mean any person.