Sorry, I just needed to get this out..

[Spork4pedro]

I am posting this on here as opposed to facebook, where people actually know my family and I, since I'm not sure how comfortable my dad would be with it and since he has no clue about this site I think I'm okay. So please bare with me as I just need somewhere to let this out. Thank you.

Tomorrow morning my dad is going into surgery to have his bladder among other things removed due to cancer that was found about a month ago. It was found during another emergency surgery and so far is localized to just the bladder and is in very early stages. So there is a lot of optimism in his recovery but of course, no one is sure with cancer.

I just am so scared and feeling so guilty right now. I lost my mother to a long battle with ovarian cancer when I was 14 and didn't do (what I consider) much for her at that time and have lived with that guilt ever since. I am scared since I don't want to lose my dad too and I am guilty since I am unable to go to the hospital or help out my stepmom since I live 4 hours away and cannot leave due to work. They keep telling me it's fine that i'm not down there and there's nothing that I can do but I just feel like I'm redoing what I did with mom all over.

Anyway, thanks for letting me get this out and if anyone feels up to it, please send some positive thoughts my family's way. We can always use a little more positive in our lives

[Sonoma]

Sending hugs & positive thoughts. Been through that with my dad & esophageal cancer that he fought for several years.

[Lyse]

Hugs and prayers.

[Food Lady]

I sympathize with your feelings about your mom. When my mom had cancer I was too wrapped up in my life to really be there for her. But she understood, and doesn't hold it against me. Don't beat yourself up; none of us is perfect. All you can do is learn from each situation. ((hugs))

[Spork4pedro]

Thank you for the support!

Just heard back from my Stepmom and apparently they found more cancer. They extended the surgery and removed more things (not sure exactly what yet) But he's doing well during the surgery so that's a plus.

[Akasa]

Oh man. /hugs
You can get gift cards for restaurant in their area and send them so they don't have to worry about cooking for a few days. They can do take out. Maybe? That's a way you could maybe feel like you're helping.