What to give to the "don't buy me anything" person

[MaggieTheCat]

You mentioned making a blanket...how about a fleece tie blanket?

About 5-6 years ago, one of my brothers and his family made fleece tie blankets for everyone for Christmas. I LOVE mine. I still have it and use it regularly, in fact I was curled up under it this morning when it was chilly. I've never made one, but from what I understand they're not too difficult to make and don't require any sewing. Here's a how-to that I found:

http://robin.hubpages.com/hub/How-to-Make-a-Blanket

It says to use 1 yard of fabric for a baby blanket, mine is definitely bigger than that. The finished product isn't quite 2 yards long but since there's a good 2-3 inches all around that was used as the ties, they probably used 2 yards of fabric for each piece.

It's easy to wash, too, just throw it in the washing machine. And if the ties start to come apart, just tie them back together! Mine has gotten enough use that I've had to re-tie it a few times, lol.

[trailerparkmedic]

I'm hoping like mad I can go see my friend out of town since there's a book store with a whole wall of cookbooks and I bet I could find something good there, but odds are I won't be "allowed" to go since I was "just" there in October.

So go online and buy her one. Find out what kind of diet she's on (low carb? Weight watchers? low fat?) and find a book that works with it.

[Nurian]

I am this person and I tell everyone the same thing about gift for me: if you feel the need to give me a gift, a gift card to Walmart is best. I can use it for food, fun or practical.

[MoonCat]

Every year I swear I'm just going to give everybody a bag of noodles...

But seriously, I like the bread idea. See, the nice thing about food is you eat it and it's gone; better to leave them wanting more than have them think, 'darn, there's that widget I got for Christmas, I'm sick of dusting that thing...'

[ShadowBall]

I guess I want to get her something because I'm going to feel bad when she gets nothing from me (or anyone else) and she buys me a bunch of shit (most of which gets returned because I'd never use it). Funny thing is every year, she will buy herself gifts and sign them as "from Shadowball." Why she can't just tell me she wants some of those things rather than buy them herself is beyond me.

Her diet is just...a diet. Basically low-fat, low-sugar, low-calorie. No rhyme or reason, just, "Fat is bad, sugar is bad, calories are bad." She also doesn't use a rosary when she prays.

I'm also considering getting a really big analog phone number list. She keeps all important phone numbers scribbled on a single sheet of paper near the phone that routinely gets lost, but odds are she'd just bitch that she wanted the scrap of paper. And now that I think about it, she's got more blankets than she even knows what to do with, so I don't think she needs anymore.

I think I may go with the cushion, a cookbook or two, and a gift card to WalMart. Le sigh...why can't she be easy to shop for like my BF who sends me a written wish list each year?

[Scorpodael]

Maybe you can find a neat little talking scale that shouts perky motivational phrases whenever she gets on it. ... surely it's a product that exists somewhere- it's too annoying an idea not to have been thought up by a CEO. Also, your mother's diet is more likely to make her GAIN weight if she's starving herself of calories.

<edit> This has been bothering me for a while, but I JUST realized what your relationship with your mother reminds me of- Principal Skinner and his mother, from the Simpsons.

[crazyofficeclerk]

My mom is sort of the same way. Whatever she wants or needs, she buys herself. So this year, I am planning on making her a ZooPal for our local zoo. I will donate money in her name toward an animal and they send a certificate, a small stuffed animal... usually of the animal you donate to and a letter. This way, she gets something and the local zoo gets helped out.

[artcurmudgeon]

Okay I am going to chime in on this one as I am this person through and through.

My reasons are simple. I hate Christmas. my birthday is 4 days after Xmas and I grew up in a rich family who were cheap every chance they could. its petty, but its my right to be miserable.

My loving wife understands better than most. She will fix me something that I love to eat, she wont over do the holiday. and she even tries to make my birthday better.

Just because I hate the holiday doesn't mean I don't buy presents for my loved ones. I do and then I get crap because I don't want anything.

I am happiest when left alone or at least not bothered much on the holidays.

Yes I am a curmudgeon and proud of it...DAMMIT KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN!!!

[CorneliaMarieRocks]

Shadowball, you mentioned that she likes cooking, does she watch Food Network? If so, who's her favorite chef (if she has one that is)..Get her a cookbook from her favorite chef. You can buy them online & some of the chefs will even autograph it for her if you ask in the special requests section

Good luck!

[blas]

This year is the first time I'm considering not getting anything for those who keep telling me "I don't know!" or "Nothing!" or shrug their shoulders at me.

It would save me some time and a lot of money. If you want something, you let me know.

In the past, I've gotten stuff for even those who have hemmed and hawwed or refused to answer me. But as times get tougher, it's about time I save some money and people learn to use their big boy and girl voices and make a decision.

Sorry. Assholish but true.

[Ben_Who]

My mother is pretty bad with the whole "Oh I just don't know" thing, but if anyone ever says, flat out, "I don't want anything" or the equivalent, I make a charitable donation to an appropriate cause with the money. They can feel like they got something and that their wishes were heeded. Of course, if they're my cousin "Irma" and they're just saying it to be a twat, and they actually want expensive gifts lavished upon them and will get pissy if they don't, it works for that, too.

Oh, Irma, how I do look forward to your annual holiday meltdown...

[ShadowBall]

Unfortunately Mom doesn't have cable - not even basic - so no television watching for her.

Anyway, I think I did alright gifts-wise. I got her the shiatsu back massage cushion I originally intended to get, a movie she said she wanted, and two diet cookbooks. She's always bitching about how we (yes, we...she has also forced me into dieting) can't have any sugary food because we're dieting, so I got her a diet dessert cookbook. She can't say no junk food after Christmas. The other book is a giant book of 300-calorie meals.

And I'm sure I'll get a truckload of dumb shit I don't want or need that I can't give away or return, and then get to hear her bitching about her maxed-out credit card and how poor she is. Yup - Happy Holidays.

[HappyFun Ball]

If I had your mother.. I wouldn't get jack shit for her.

[Becks]

If I had your mother.. I wouldn't get jack shit for her.

Same here.