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So its been a rough winter for us. Real, real rough. Like "oh look, we ran out of oil for the heating, and we only have 75 cents in our bank account..."
We've been struggling to get by, and pretty much everyone in our family is aware of this.
All except, apparently, my mother. Well, she knows, but she chooses to ignore it, saying that we "make more than her anyways, try living on the amount she gets." You're a single person household, mom. We are a four person.
Anyways, so last night she called up, got my husband, and talked to him for half an hour. I noticed that he didn't talk a lot, mostly listened...and looked extremely, extremely uncomfortable the longer it went on. Eventually he hung up, and told me that the whole point of it was her trying to convince us to take on a "homeless teenager".
Wait, what?
According to her, her friend's friend's son who lives with OTHER family rather than his parents, is being kicked out. Why? Nobody knows. Either way, he's two months to graduating high school, so "he can move on", and needs a place to stay. I'm not clear on why, but for some reason, he's not moving in with any of his friends, he's not moving back in with either of his parents, and he's not even going to move in with his long-time girlfriend.
So my mother, so helpfully, volunteered our home. Without really discussing it first with us. She just kinda told them "Oh hey, my daughter could probably take him in!"
Let me especially point out a few things:
- She does not know this kid. He's 18, that's really all she knows. She's never met him, nothing. But she assures me he's "completely trustworthy, a very, very well behaved kid, and would not do anything inappropriate". So....she knows him that well? Oh no, no she doesn't, she just knows he wouldn't.
- I have two young daughters. How dare I insinuate that he might do something pervy!! How could I?! Oh, but again, she doesn't know this guy, but how dare I make assumptions that he could possibly do something like this!
- She wants him to sleep in our den. Which has basically all of our stuff. Our DVDs, Blurays, video games, consoles, and my collectibles. Did I seriously just assume that he might be a thief as well?! He's a good kid, he would never do that! No, no she hasn't met him, no she doesn't know him, but he wouldn't do that!
- We cannot afford the burden of another person, even if everything else was in line. But, how could we, we're terrible people because we still actually own things. Maybe if we sold off some of our stuff, we could help out this poor kid, are we seriously trying to force him to sleep in the streets? And you know, this leads in to her other problem with us, we actually bought a game two months ago, that money could've been spent on our children! Preordered and paid for five months back? Well, that's a lie, and that money should've all gone to the kids, stop buying stuff for yourselves, and start selling off your video games! (Sidenote: I HAVE sold a lot of my collectible games, she has no idea how bad I cried that I had to part with Tactics Ogre and Misadventures of Tron Bonne)
- If it's such a big deal that he find a place, why couldn't he stay with her? But, don't I realize that she won't be home, and he'd be at her place, alone?! How could I start laughing at that point, I need to realize that he simply can't stay at her place...she doesn't know what he'd be doing, and he might get bored. How dare I say that is the same problem I have, its nothing alike!
Needless to say, I've completely put my foot down, I've got to worry about my kids' safety first above all, not even to mention the myriad other problems that this would entail.
I got lectured about my bad attitude over this for a good 20-30 minutes. Ended up hanging up, I just don't have the energy to deal with this sort of thing, there's PLENTY of buddies in her network she could've asked, who are in better positions to help. But instead she volunteers us.
So freaking angry right now, it's not even funny.
We've been struggling to get by, and pretty much everyone in our family is aware of this.
All except, apparently, my mother. Well, she knows, but she chooses to ignore it, saying that we "make more than her anyways, try living on the amount she gets." You're a single person household, mom. We are a four person.
Anyways, so last night she called up, got my husband, and talked to him for half an hour. I noticed that he didn't talk a lot, mostly listened...and looked extremely, extremely uncomfortable the longer it went on. Eventually he hung up, and told me that the whole point of it was her trying to convince us to take on a "homeless teenager".
Wait, what?
According to her, her friend's friend's son who lives with OTHER family rather than his parents, is being kicked out. Why? Nobody knows. Either way, he's two months to graduating high school, so "he can move on", and needs a place to stay. I'm not clear on why, but for some reason, he's not moving in with any of his friends, he's not moving back in with either of his parents, and he's not even going to move in with his long-time girlfriend.
So my mother, so helpfully, volunteered our home. Without really discussing it first with us. She just kinda told them "Oh hey, my daughter could probably take him in!"
Let me especially point out a few things:
- She does not know this kid. He's 18, that's really all she knows. She's never met him, nothing. But she assures me he's "completely trustworthy, a very, very well behaved kid, and would not do anything inappropriate". So....she knows him that well? Oh no, no she doesn't, she just knows he wouldn't.
- I have two young daughters. How dare I insinuate that he might do something pervy!! How could I?! Oh, but again, she doesn't know this guy, but how dare I make assumptions that he could possibly do something like this!
- She wants him to sleep in our den. Which has basically all of our stuff. Our DVDs, Blurays, video games, consoles, and my collectibles. Did I seriously just assume that he might be a thief as well?! He's a good kid, he would never do that! No, no she hasn't met him, no she doesn't know him, but he wouldn't do that!
- We cannot afford the burden of another person, even if everything else was in line. But, how could we, we're terrible people because we still actually own things. Maybe if we sold off some of our stuff, we could help out this poor kid, are we seriously trying to force him to sleep in the streets? And you know, this leads in to her other problem with us, we actually bought a game two months ago, that money could've been spent on our children! Preordered and paid for five months back? Well, that's a lie, and that money should've all gone to the kids, stop buying stuff for yourselves, and start selling off your video games! (Sidenote: I HAVE sold a lot of my collectible games, she has no idea how bad I cried that I had to part with Tactics Ogre and Misadventures of Tron Bonne)
- If it's such a big deal that he find a place, why couldn't he stay with her? But, don't I realize that she won't be home, and he'd be at her place, alone?! How could I start laughing at that point, I need to realize that he simply can't stay at her place...she doesn't know what he'd be doing, and he might get bored. How dare I say that is the same problem I have, its nothing alike!
Needless to say, I've completely put my foot down, I've got to worry about my kids' safety first above all, not even to mention the myriad other problems that this would entail.
I got lectured about my bad attitude over this for a good 20-30 minutes. Ended up hanging up, I just don't have the energy to deal with this sort of thing, there's PLENTY of buddies in her network she could've asked, who are in better positions to help. But instead she volunteers us.
So freaking angry right now, it's not even funny.
RED FLAG #1. No friends or relatives to turn to!! Methinks he already alienated them with his as yet unspecified baggage. What do they (your mother included) know that they aren't telling?
Also why you and not 
BTW, she's "knows" he's good and would never do this how?
Does that have to do with the reason he's homeless in the first place?
No good deed goes unpunished, you'll get burned if you cave. At worst, the concerns in your OP will be realized; at best, he'll get comfortable with the arrangement and never leave. I have plenty of relatives who speak from experience. Come to think of it: remember your brother.
....either that or she was adopted or switched at the hospital.
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