Does anyone speak cat?

[NecessaryCatharsis]

I would like this translated please:

I appreciate that you're a happy cat. I love that you are relaxed in our house hold, and feel free to express yourself here. I don't love being repeatedly stabbed with your happy paws.

You may have seen the pictures around, yes there were other cats before you. They all learned to understand the difference between human and cat flesh, and grew to appreciate that when the humans shrieked hysterically, and removed the claws from their thigh, it meant the paws were too enthusiastic and happy for human interaction. Why won't you learn!?

You are almost a year old, I'm going to start whispering the declawing procedures to you at cuddle time. You have two months. If I continue going out looking like I can't figure out what barbed wire fencing is for, drastic steps will be taken.

[fireheart]

I take it that he/she is stabbing you when it comes time for sleep?

Usually what I do is put a pillow/cushion of some kind as a layer between me and my legs. That way cat still gets me to sleep on and I don't get the ouchies.

[NecessaryCatharsis]

No, he stabs me repeatedly while he purrs, and 'kneads' me.

[Kaylyn]

Best responses I've seen to cats that knead with claws is when they start, try to position them in a way so they can't get to your skin. Like, turn them around so their back is to you, and give them an old pillow or blanket that they can safely knead on. Or pick them up and put them down when they start, and give them extra loving attention when they're being affectionate without the claws. Cats are tricky to train...at least I've never successfully managed to train a cat to do anything...but that's the recommendation, anyway.

If your cat is cooperative, keep the claws trimmed (don't cut the quick, the vein inside the claw!) or put the little silicone tips on his claws to stop him from hurting you; it will be far less traumatic than the surgery.

[Seshat]

You're speaking excellent cat. The problem is that your cat isn't speaking human.

You need to find a way to express 'no claws!' that this particular cat understands. Kaylyn made several excellent suggestions.

I also agree with Kaylyn: please try absolutely everything rather than declawing. Your vet and your vet techs are almost certainly animal behaviourist specialists as well as skilled purely with animal medicine; they can help you find a way to teach your cat what is unacceptable; if Kaylyn's suggestions don't work.

[TheSHAD0W]

I would like this translated please:

I appreciate that you're a happy cat. I love that you are relaxed in our house hold, and feel free to express yourself here. I don't love being repeatedly stabbed with your happy paws.

Mew, meow meow mewww, rawr HISS.

You may have seen the pictures around, yes there were other cats before you. They all learned to understand the difference between human and cat flesh, and grew to appreciate that when the humans shrieked hysterically, and removed the claws from their thigh, it meant the paws were too enthusiastic and happy for human interaction. Why won't you learn!?

Meow, mew mew meow, mrowr rawr growl GROWL meow mew?!

You are almost a year old, I'm going to start whispering the declawing procedures to you at cuddle time. You have two months. If I continue going out looking like I can't figure out what barbed wire fencing is for, drastic steps will be taken.

Mew mew purr meow rawr mrowr GROWL.

You're welcome.

[Lachrymose]

Might want to contact Amy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwhVFKzA72Q

[Gravekeeper]

Cats are like Elder Gods, to try and peer into their mind is to know true madness. ;p

Cats do not understand cause and effect and suck at associating a punitive outcome with an action. It just makes them afraid of you rather than work out that doing A gets them punished with B. Unless you can immediately catch them red handed on the spot.

That said, sound usually gets their attention if they're doing something bad and they do understand social rejection. IE if she's clawing you, pick her up and put her down until she figures out that she gets to stay on your lap if she doesn't claw.

With my insane house gremlin sound usually works. When I first got her as a rescue cat she was a terror, but any other method like spray bottles, etc, just made her afraid of bottle or the sound of the bottle instead of associate the bottle with a behaviour. So she'd run off when she saw the bottle, even if it was just on the cupboard.

Now, we have a universal understanding that a sharp "ssst!" means whatever you're doing is bad, stop it. Though being a cat it still takes catching her a few times before it sinks in.

[freeatlast]

You could try the covers that glue onto their claws - I think they are called Soft Paws. My sister used them on her cats rather than declawing them. After a while, they become so used to them that they don't use their claws to scratch people or furniture. I think she purchased them online.

[Moirae]

lol. My cat still does that and she's 11. I just gently remove her claws and hold her paws in my hand but keep cuddling. You figure ways around it.

[Gravekeeper]

Soft Paws, and other kitty claw tips ( you can get silicon ones at most pet stores now me thinks ) are a bit of a toss up. Some cats have no problem with it, others will chew them off immediately. They also only last about 3-4 weeks before they fall off by themselves with the cat's natural claw growth. So just remember if you go that route, its one of those products were you're on the hook for life. ;p

Also, your cat needs to tolerate letting you glue them on to begin with. I'm not sure mine would, and mine has claws like a god damn raptor. Luckily, she's not a kneader.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

lol. My cat still does that and she's 11. I just gently remove her claws and hold her paws in my hand but keep cuddling. You figure ways around it.

Pretty much. Different cats will do this, you will also have a few who don't so much. But IMHO it goes back to when they were babies and they did this when nursing at Mommy's titty. It's a security thing with them.

I had one cat who while doing that would nuzzle my neck . . . believe me that wasn't so bad but his paws would inch up and get off my clothing and onto bare skin . . .

[NecessaryCatharsis]

I have known lots of cats before and most do some of this but this guy....If I walked up to anyone in shorts today and said 'Hi, I'm NC, my hobbies are jogging through thistles, shaving blindfolded and being the person on the spinning wheel in beginner knife throwing class.' they would just nod and think 'Oh, that explains it.'

I tried theSHADOW's translation but I think my accent must be bad, because he responded by aggressively pouncing on a throw pillow.

I like Kaylyn and Gravekeepers social rejection strategy, of putting him down and ignoring him for a bit if the claws come out. Yelling ouch! and removing the claws certainly doesn't seem to be working.

I also googled the silicone tips, I had never heard of them until today, and if I can't get this solved by his year old shots/check-up (beginning november) I will be asking the vet about that option instead of declawing.

I will let you all know how it goes.

[AccountingDrone]

I also googled the silicone tips, I had never heard of them until today, and if I can't get this solved by his year old shots/check-up (beginning november) I will be asking the vet about that option instead of declawing.

I will let you all know how it goes.

I used those on my Feline Mistress and as long as you have someone to help you the first few times until you learn how to do it without gluing the little toe hairs in with the claws they are just fine.

They come in all sorts of colors. I used to get a bunch and do rainbow paws

[Seshat]

Shiro - our surviving cat - tolerates Soft Paws just fine, and also the process of putting them on. He just has to have a human remind him that WE are in charge, then he'll lie down and sort-of patiently wait till we're done fiddling with his paws.

Seph - ElderlyCat, who went to Kitty Heaven - used to chew the Soft Paws off within an hour of them being put on.