How to deal with death of coworker's spouse

[laborcat]

So my friend and co-worker E's husband passed away sometime last night. A called me at home this morning and let me know. I was kind of hoping it was usual store misinformed scuttlebutt up til I saw something posted on Facebook earlier this evening. Now I'm a massive emotional wreck on a lot of levels and I'm struggling to know what to do. Appropriate behavior for shit like this baffles me.

As her union steward I'm trying to get hold of the rep to sort out getting her some financial help. Her husband had been going the some pretty pricey medical issues. They were struggling financially with her being the only income and believe me it wasn't enough most of the time. I know it won't be much but I figure anything will be a start. I'm not aware of any life insurance. When I get back to work tomorrow I'll see that someone responsible starts up some sort of collection for her. Hopefully her sister will be working and I can ask her what needs to be done. I just want to keep her head above water. This sucks.

I'm not making much sense. I just need to get this out. I know she's just in that place where she's trying to sort out everything at once. I don't want to add to the stress, which is why im just trying to quietly get something started. Every time I think about it I'm back in tears. Even when I didn't like my ex, to lose him even now would just tear me in half.

So I guess what my question is, is does anyone have any ideas for me to help this woman without being in the way, or adding to the stress. I'll text her tomorrow if I can't get hold of her sister but this isn't like back home where you just show up with a casserole and help clean up the place. I just feel helpless. Her life was so much stress before, I don't want to make it worse.

[TawnyMyst]

If you can make up some pre-cooked frozen dinners and see if some people from work might be willing too as well. Be one less thing to worry about for her with everything. Maybe offer to help with household chores or other errands and just generally be there for her. As her union steward, maybe see about a leave of absence and her bereavement leave, and have the paperwork started for her?

[csquared]

If you are in a position to do so, let her know that you are there to help. Does she need a ride someplace? Need something picked up. Anything. I had a friend whose father was dying. What he really needed was someone to go to the airport and pickup his car.

And let her know what you are doing from the union standpoint.