Moving the Kid

[AnaKhouri]

We're moving from our apartment to our first house in a couple months (yay!). We'll be moving two weeks before Khan's first birthday.

I know moving will probably be a huge change for him, but how can I minimize the trauma? I plan to keep our routines (breakfast/lunch/bath times, bedtime and nap routines etc) as well as I can. We plan to move all the furniture in one day (all the smaller stuff will go over beforehand). I was thinking of sending him to grandma's overnight while we move the furniture, and then get his room all set up so when he comes home it will at least look similar to what it was before. On the other hand, that will be his first overnight away from me and husband, so is it best not to combine two firsts?

I've already moved once with the cat so I know what to do with her, but I have no idea when it comes to the kid!

[JustaCashier]

If it's not too inconvenient to send him to Grandma's in general, (other than Mommy and Daddy missing him terribly ), and since the move is still a couple months away, howzabout a few nights spent with Grandma in the meantime?


And even though going to Grandma's is about the coolest thing in the world in general, maybe Grandma could come up with some extra special fun things appropriate to Khan's age, to where he might even really really look forward to the visit on moving day!

Mike

[r2cagle]

Treat the kid, just like the cat! Hug, pet, feed, and move. The more matter of fact you are, and less stressed you stay, the better the both of them will adjust. Kids are more resilient than animals, unless yours has ocd or something that getting off schedule knocks him for a loop. In which case, doesn't matter, pick what's easiest for you.

I'm not trying to be flippant, but do what you need to do to not be stressed and worn out. If that means an overnight stay, then so be it. If you think you can handle being exhausted from moving and dealing with your son, then do that. It'll be fine, I promise.

Has he started walking yet, or trying? He's close to a year old isn't he?

[shankyknitter]

I second Justacashier, is it possible to have Khan sleep at grandma's once or twice before the move? Remembering back to the moves I made as a kid, mom and dad shipped me off to grandma and grandpa's and had my room unpacked when I got there.

Also is he's so small he'll forget about the stress of moving in a day or two. Little ones tend to adjust pretty quick to stuff like this so long as mommy and daddy are there to make it home, he'll be fine.

[trailerparkmedic]

I'd sent Khan to Grandma's for your sanity. Nothing like a tired, cranky, bored 1 year old to make a long day seem even longer.

I wouldn't worry too much about the move itself. He probably will see it as an adventure and have fun exploring the new house.

[Seshat]

I second (or third) the advice here.

Give him a place to go away from the stress of the move that he's familiar with and happy with. (Grandma's is ideal.)
Keep him out from underfoot during the move itself - at Grandma's. Or wherever.

Before and after the move, keep the routine fairly normal, but do explain what's going on.
Have him help pack some things, and keep that box for him to unpack after the move. (Maybe the kitchen plasticware.) Involving him in the process in a way he understands will probably annoy the crap out of you and make that part of the process go frustratingly slowly, but it should help him.

Most importantly, make sure he knows his family loves him - and will NOT forget him and leave him behind. That's probably his biggest fear, if he's old enough to understand that possibility.
If he wants to personally pack his toys or clothes and watch you write his name on the box, go ahead and help him - it should reassure him that you are taking him with you.

Um. Anyway. That's the advice of a woman who has no kids. So take it with as much salt as you need.

[AnaKhouri]

Thanks everyone! Khan is only 8 months old and when we move he will be almost a year- so I'm not sure how much he understands. Of course he is exceptionally bright, perceptive, observant, sweet, cute, handsome...

[Plaidman]

I have terrible short term memory. But I do remember my move to what was my main home for 8 or so years. I moved there at 1ish ironically.


Granted, every child is different. But I wasn't really affected. I remember hating the fact I wasn't with my cousin anymore, who was the same age as me. (My uncle and his wife shared a home with their kids and mom/me/sister. It was a BIIIIIIIIIIIG freaking house, which is ironically now just down the street where I currently live..)

I wouldn't worry too much. He'll likely forget the old place within the month or so. I did miss my friend. Though nowadays she so strung out on meth it likely was a good thing.

[Exaspera]

I think it's a great idea to spend the night at Grandmas. You will be so busy with the move that keeping track of your soon-to-be one year-old will be difficult. He may cry a bit when you leave him, but as soon as you are gone for about 5 minutes, he'll forget all about missing you, as Grand ma will have all sorts of cool stuff to explore.

Yes, I am a Mom amd a brand-new Grandma, so I can speak from experience. And congratulations on your new house!