No Mat Leave

[Magpie]

Ok, I'm asking this hopefully well in advance of needing this.

I don't get maternity leave. Yes, this is legal - technically speaking I'm not employed, it's all scholarships. Best case, I get effective maternity leave (although not quite as much money). Second best case, I take longer than I'm supposed to on my degree and get 8 months. More likely, I'll be wanting a job ASAP afterwards, and am going to have to make use of infant daycare. The wait lists in the region are apparently about one year. That basically means that if I put my name on a list the instant I know I'm pregnant (you know, before I tell anyone even, because the miscarriage risk is too high), I will hopefully have a spot once the kid is old enough for daycare. Is my math wrong, or is that how it works?

And can anyone offer any other advice on the lines of infant daycare? I'm not really in a position to be able to ask people I know in real life, but if I'm going to need to pick a place before I announce a pregnancy, I'm going to be stuck. I'm assuming that you drop the kid off with milk and diapers in the morning, and pick the kid up with dirty diapers in the evening. I can't really be too picky about where we go, unless there's major issues we already know where we want/need to choose. There's only two in easy walking distance, and one of them is much more out of the way than the other, and needs some work done on their sign, which isn't a great omen.

Before people point out the obvious - my husband can't really take parental leave, as his research is much more cutting-edge than mine, and taking 4 months out of getting his research published would really hurt it. (He can't take leave in less than 4-month intervals because the bursaries are only if you take the entire term off, and paying a full term's tuition for half a term of work is stupid). And I don't need the economics lesson, I'm a special case because a) my region has a very generous childcare subsidy b) with a professional salary you don't lose money until you have two kids.

[r2cagle]

If you are starting to think about and try to have children.. now is a great time to start interviewing daycares. And yes, that's what you need to do. Interview them, ask them all the questions that you have. A really good and decent daycare director will take the time you need and be willing to answer all your questions. I started the month I found out I was pregnant, and I had my child reserved on 4 different wait lists before I was six months pregnant. I was told that a year long wait list is the norm.

Just about the time I was getting desperate, the daycare I was most interested in called about a spot that was open. I was there that day to fill out the required paperwork and reservation fee.
And 'then' I cancelled the other waiting list reserved spots.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I'm assuming that you drop the kid off with milk and diapers in the morning, and pick the kid up with dirty diapers in the evening.

Well, if they did that, I wouldn't leave my kid there. They'll change diapers as needed, though according to some of my friends most won't allow anything other than disposables (for sanitation reasons).

Someone here works for a daycare (Bugged Mei?). I don't know where, though.

[Magpie]

Dirty diapers as in the diapers that they used during that day.

And what sort of questions do I ask? Apparently I should be checking that they let you use diaper service diapers. (I will phrase it that way, because they're the easy-to-change kind). I don't have a lot of choice in it, although I guess I'll have some freedom in how long my leave is, since it won't be restricted by EI benefits, so I can wait for either one. Would I want to check that they'll use my milk instead of requiring me to use formula? (Is it just me, or do both of the above restrictions come down to "is this for rich families only"?)

[r2cagle]

Not sure about rules in Ontario, but in the US, pretty much all the daycares require disposable diapers. That's due to Health and Safety guidelines, Sanitation, etc. However, there is a new type of diaper (a G-diaper?? not sure of name) that the main body of the diaper is reusable and washable, and there is a disposable insert that can be tossed and replaced with a clean one. BUT, the initial cost is kind of expensive, but way easier and more portable to use than regular diapers. I have a sister in law that is using them on the youngest daughter.

As for breast milk, that should not be a problem if you are expressing and putting in the bottles yourself. The daycare should have a refridgerator in the room that can be used to store bottles for the day. I used to store, then make up all bottles the morning of, and take them every day for my son. Other moms used to just bring empty bottles and powdered formula for the worker to make up themselves. It should not matter to daycare whether you are feeding breast milk or formula except as it pertains to baby's health.

What you really want is a daycare that's going to be willing to work with you as a paid partner to take care of your child and be an active participant. You should not feel as if your wishes are not being heard.

Some of the questions that I remember asking while checking out different places.
What are the hours of operation. What's the cost, and acceptable methods of payment. What are the penalties of late pickups. How much notice do you need if I choose to keep my child home for a day or more? How are the rooms set up, and what is the maximum number of kids in each class. What things/food/toys/clothes am I expected to provide? What is the policy on medication?

Most organized daycares will have a parent handbook that you can look at while visiting/interviewing. Though, I was not able to actually take a parent handbook home until my son was enrolled. Plus some of them have websites that you can go to find out some of the answers to your questions.

[BookstoreEscapee]

My friend uses G-diapers. She loves them. Another uses cloth (and has some of the cutest covers for them!) but she'll have to switch soon when she goes back to work (baby is ~6 months old), at least during the day when he's at daycare.

I think it's a safe bet that if they would have to set aside bags of dirty diapers for the parents to pick up at the end of the day (keeping each kid's separate, of course), you're not likely to find someone willing to do that, unless it's an expensive private caregiver. Any regular licensed daycare center, with lots of kids, isn't going to want to deal with that, and it may even be against the law.