The Pistachio Lobbyist (bizarre)

[Boozy]

Guy comes in and immediately starts talking to me about pistachios. He's really excited about them, and can't wait to tell me all about their iron and vitamin B content.

Man: "You can put them in anything! Any recipe! Or enjoy them on their own as a healthy and delicious snack!"

And so on. He had a very vaudevillian demeanor, which made the whole thing more surreal.

I start looking around for the hidden camera, infomercial production team, snickering prankster manager in corner.... something to explain what the hell is going on.

Me: Look, I'm not going to buy any pistachios from you. I have to get back to work.
Man: I'm not selling them. But you should pick some up from the grocery store before heading home!
Me: Okay. Are you a pistachio farmer or something?
Man: No maam! Just love my pistachios.
Me: You in the pistachio industry then?
Man: Nope! Just spreading the word, my dear!

I swear to god, I couldn't make this up if I tried.

Is there actually a lobby group for the pistachio industry? And is this what they do? I seriously can't explain it otherwise.

[Moggie]

er...well... there was certainly *some* kind of nut involved.

[Imogene]

Just spreading the word, my dear!

And the word is Pistachio!
*bows in reverence to the Holy Nutter*

[Soulstealer]

Well they are delicous.

In all seriousness, that guy is nuts.

[sld72382]

I like Pistachios, but I'm not that devoted.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

So will there be equal time given to the walnut, filburt, peanut and macadamia lobbies then?

In all seriousness, that guy is nuts.

Boo. Just...boo.

[Soulstealer]

So will there be equal time given to the walnut, filburt, peanut and macadamia lobbies then?

Well they are delicous.

In all seriousness, that guy is nuts.

Boo. Just...boo.

I swear I didn't mean to do that when I typed it, however I saw it before submitting and did it anyway.

I could go for one of those canisters with mixed nuts right about now, except for the filburt.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

What a nut . . . literally.

[dougiezerts]

I think I'll go out and buy pistacios
NOT!

[LingualMonkey]

I have cracked this tough nut! He's a terrorist!

From The Huffington Post, June 17, 2008 by Richard Silverstein (emphasis emphatically mine):

Apparently, the new U.S. Ambassador to Israel has gotten all worked up over the fact that Israel is violating its own laws against trading with the Iranian enemy by eating Iranian pistachios. I kid you not:

Ten days ago, US Ambassador to Israel Richard H. Jones wrote a severe letter to Finance Minister Ronnie Bar-On [...] accus[ing] Israel of secretly trading with Iran and transferring foreign currency to the country, in direct violation of an Israeli law prohibiting trade with enemy states.

The fuss is over something Iran is famous for, though perhaps less than its nuclear ambitions; namely pistachio nuts. The American government accused Israel of buying Iranian pistachios under the guise of trade with Turkey.

So, eating pistachios gives money to Iran to fund bombs and terrorism!

Or does this make me sound like a wingnut?

[TOLady]

I got no further than the title of your thread and had to go to my local bulk store and buy some!

Fortunately, the store is only 4 away from my local pub with wireless where I am currently sitting!


That being said, I would never go around telling total strangers about my current cravings. I'd never get served anywhere.

That guy is truly whacked!

_____________

One month closer to retirement (unless EQ wants to hire me to work in her hotel - did I mention I make a really great cheese fondue as well)!

[Soulstealer]

So, eating pistachios gives money to Iran to fund bombs and terrorism!

I did not know terrorism was so delicous. I may need to go to the store again.

[LingualMonkey]

Only the pistachios that have the red dye that gets all over your hands have anything to do with nutty, delicious terrorism.

[Lioness Blackfire]

Wow. There's a cause I never thought I'd see a lobbyist for. Crazy!

But on the other hand...
Well, have you ever just eaten one pistachio?

[Danno]

He could have been one of those people hired for a word of mouth advertising campaign. However the point of those is to be subtle, a word that guy probably doesn't know the meaning of. Heh, there's a reason they used to be called "whisper" campaigns, not "excited fanatic" campaigns.