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she's being nice, she must want me!

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  • #1

    she's being nice, she must want me!

    Now I realize some people aren't used to top-notch service and friendly faces...but...give it up!

    Now, I am VERY NICE and VERY WELCOMING at my job. When I signed my employment papers & read the employee manual this said it was required and if I wasn't like this it was grounds for dismisal.


    I get done being nice & jovial to our guests, as I am required and paid to do, check guests in...ask them if they need anything etc etc etc whatever. Whatever possible, within reason & hotel related, I am expected to do without hesitation and happily.

    This gets confused among some, though...

    I get some men who want to flirt, ask for my number, ask me way too many personal questions etc. I have had men stay up all night or most of the night wanting so desperately to get to know me. At work I can't tell them to go away, so I continue to just be wonderful (although I am anything but wonderful to such people in life outside of work) and they continue to think I am totally all about them. It's a ploy, get over yourself. I even lay down hints. Most recently I had a Highway Patrol guy after me even though I told him I am with the "love of my life" and we are happy etc etc etc. I was nice, but when he left I thought very ill of this guy.

    Now, male guests who want attention, I realize that service in the world has gone down hill, but honestly. I am ONLY sweet to you because I am AT WORK. This does NOT mean I want your body let alone anything to do with you outside of work.

    Sadly, only one chick has ever hit on me. And I thought it cute more then anything, but refreshing oddly enough.
    When it comes to getting things done, we need fewer architects and more bricklayers. ---Colleen C. Barrett---
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  • #2
    I can totally relate. When I was working at the CD store in highschool, I had many guys try to get my number - hello, I'm trying to get you to buy things! I wasn't even flirting, I was just friendly and helpful. *shrug*
    The report button - not just for decoration

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    • #3
      Quoth iradney View Post
      I can totally relate. When I was working at the CD store in highschool, I had many guys try to get my number - hello, I'm trying to get you to buy things! I wasn't even flirting, I was just friendly and helpful. *shrug*
      Honestly, how could you blame them? You're adorable.
      "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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      • #4
        Quoth Food Lady View Post
        Honestly, how could you blame them? You're adorable.
        naww
        The report button - not just for decoration

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        • #5
          I had to stop my brother from doing something similar many moons ago. We were in Hawaii (a trip that my brother won in a drawing), and decided to check out a bar near the hotel. The waitress we had was very attractive and very sweet. My brother apparently mistook this for her being interested in him/us, and he told me he was going to write down our hotel room number and ask her to stop by after work.

          It took me about 15 minutes to convince him that this was a bad, bad idea, and would probably have offended the poor girl deeply. He finally listened to me, though.

          And he's the older brother!

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          • #6
            Alright, I've always felt that it isn't appropriate to ask for someone's number at their workplace, but what if they're trying to get your attention, such as adjusting their dress to show more cleavage, etc.?
            Otaku

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            • #7
              This reminds me of the type of guy who would go to Hooters or even a strip joint and think the girls there actually wanted to date. Yes, they are showing you their ladyparts, but that just means they want you to put money in there My friend worked as a dancer and she had more than a few issues with men trying to get her number, even when she hadn't talked to them at all, only danced!

              I think this is a problem for a lot of girls in the service industry. A few times I have been having a completely normal small-talk session with a male customer as they purchase something and then they ask for the phone number. Wha?!?! Nooo, I was just being nice, partially because you are buying something and it is required that I not ignore you.

              Funny, though, like thehippie said, getting hit on by girls is really much more flattering. Maybe guys could get some pick-up tips from them
              !
              "For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction." -- Lord Byron

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              • #8
                My ex thought for the longest time that the drive-thru server at a fast food place was flirting with him...no you dork, she's just being friendly (that seems rare, but it does happen). I wouldn't be surprised if he actually tried to hit on her and got banned.
                "I am quite confident that I do exist."
                "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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                • #9
                  Ha, yeah. I get the internet basement dweller version of this all the time! Just because I'll answer when you IM me doesn't mean I like you. It means I want your money!
                  The best advice is this: Don't take advice and don't give advice. ~Author Unknown

                  Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself. ~Cicero

                  See the fuzzy - http://bladespark.livejournal.com/

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                  • #10
                    Quoth prb View Post
                    Alright, I've always felt that it isn't appropriate to ask for someone's number at their workplace, but what if they're trying to get your attention, such as adjusting their dress to show more cleavage, etc.?
                    Yeah, I am sure there are obvious signals. Take for instance that some of the girls of the past that worked at the hotel did actually get with guests...in the hotel. Yeah, I learned quick that this was unwise & I am pretty sure against hotel policy. lol. It happened periodically. I learned that if a guest appears to have more interest in me then they should, just be nice about it cuz we are getting their money. A lot of the ladies seemed to want the attention...but...yeah no.
                    When it comes to getting things done, we need fewer architects and more bricklayers. ---Colleen C. Barrett---

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                    • #11
                      I myself am trying to learn the difference. There's a really cute assistant manager at the Subway I frequent. I`m not sure what message she`s trying to send, but I want to make sure I`m receiving the correct one. She:
                      1. Is always friendly and enjoys small talk. This of course could either because it's her job or because she's genuinely interested.
                      2. Disconted my food. Her reason: I'm a regular and I'm always polite. I've never demanded discounts from her or worker bees who don't recognize my face. I happily pay full price so it seems the discounts aren't by obligation, but by choice.
                      To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

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                      • #12
                        My unwavering advice on this situation (for the boys) is NEVER ask them at work. If they are that interested, they will find a way to give you their number or some other irrefutable hint. ("Where do YOU work?", "Where do you hang out?", etc.)

                        If they aren't clear on the fact that a polite, nice guy (which is what is attracting them in the first place) DOESN'T take advantage of a woman's being at work then there are probably other things she hasn't thought through either....

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Mr Hero View Post
                          2. Disconted my food. Her reason: I'm a regular and I'm always polite. I've never demanded discounts from her or worker bees who don't recognize my face. I happily pay full price so it seems the discounts aren't by obligation, but by choice.
                          That could very well be a future friend (or gf?) Seems like that is a sign that she at least enjoys your company honestly and not because she has to be polite to customers. There's no need for her to give you a discount but she did voluntarily. Woot~
                          !
                          "For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction." -- Lord Byron

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                          • #14
                            from a GIRL's point of view, i think she DOES like you. either that or she just likes you as a good friend and feels that you deserve it for NOT being an SC ever...either way, it's her way of showing appreciation... have you talked to her about her hobbies yet? maybe if you two have a hobby in common you two could then go hobby-ing together for a day to see how she really feels...put her in a more natural environment and she'll act more the way she feels...couldn't hurt...

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                            • #15
                              Quoth WhiteRose View Post
                              from a GIRL's point of view, i think she DOES like you. either that or she just likes you as a good friend and feels that you deserve it for NOT being an SC ever...either way, it's her way of showing appreciation... have you talked to her about her hobbies yet? maybe if you two have a hobby in common you two could then go hobby-ing together for a day to see how she really feels...put her in a more natural environment and she'll act more the way she feels...couldn't hurt...
                              Because I'm not a SC, I don't instantly assume anything including the above. I've been testing the waters and make more casual conversation instead of just the usual dialogue that occurs when I place an order. Based on the information I got today, I think she's seeing the other manager.

                              I asked her how her weekend went today and she told me she got some new appliances for the house she's going to be living in. I thought nothing of it until it came time for my veggies.

                              Other manager and I had the same exchange. We ask about each other's weekends. When I asked if he did anything, he said, "Not much. Just worked on the house."

                              Oh well. It's better to have found out this way than to have been a SC and hit on the Assistant Manager without knowing the facts.
                              To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

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