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Now... I'll be the first to admit that I'm a very special person who prooobably shouldn't be working around as many people as I do, wielding as much power over the workings of the front end as I do. I sing songs about people's groceries, talk to myself when there aren't any groceries to sing about, and am just in general a fairly scatterbrained human being both in my professional and personal lives.
However, I have some moments that just take the cake. And they're usually at work. Within earshot of about 20 other people. Mostly, it's just moments where I pause afterward and go, "Wait... What?"
Like with the pens on my register. I NEVER keep these things in reach of customers because our EPS machines use those electronic pens. And everyone always picks up the regular pen and writes on my damned screen. I've taken to putting the pen behind my ear and handing it to customers who need it, but occasionally, I'll forget it's there and look around frantically for the damned thing. Then I'll pause, facepalm, and then hand it off to the customer.
There are also times when my brain-to-mouth filter doesn't work as it should. It's usually when I'm distracted by something else, so my answers are never sarcastic at these times, I just provide painfully obvious answers. Like the time this one woman asked me about a starfruit.
C: What's that?
Me: A starfruit.
C: A starfruit? What's that?
Me: It's a fruit shaped like a star... *pauses*
Or with a woman using the EPS while I'm focused on ringing through her groceries.
C: *has managed to do everything, including signing the screen, correctly thus far and is actually READING the screen* Which button is the done button?
Me: *again without thinking* The one that says done.
CW: *at the same time, in a voice that carries slightly louder than mine* It's the one on the right.
C: Alright. *presses button, finishes up order*
CW: *waits until C has left before looking at me*
Me: Yeah, yeah.
There are lots more, and many of them are more entertaining than those, but I have to get ready to go be an overlord. Because, you know, it'd be awesome if that were actually my job title.
However, I have some moments that just take the cake. And they're usually at work. Within earshot of about 20 other people. Mostly, it's just moments where I pause afterward and go, "Wait... What?"
Like with the pens on my register. I NEVER keep these things in reach of customers because our EPS machines use those electronic pens. And everyone always picks up the regular pen and writes on my damned screen. I've taken to putting the pen behind my ear and handing it to customers who need it, but occasionally, I'll forget it's there and look around frantically for the damned thing. Then I'll pause, facepalm, and then hand it off to the customer.
There are also times when my brain-to-mouth filter doesn't work as it should. It's usually when I'm distracted by something else, so my answers are never sarcastic at these times, I just provide painfully obvious answers. Like the time this one woman asked me about a starfruit.
C: What's that?
Me: A starfruit.
C: A starfruit? What's that?
Me: It's a fruit shaped like a star... *pauses*
Or with a woman using the EPS while I'm focused on ringing through her groceries.
C: *has managed to do everything, including signing the screen, correctly thus far and is actually READING the screen* Which button is the done button?
Me: *again without thinking* The one that says done.
CW: *at the same time, in a voice that carries slightly louder than mine* It's the one on the right.
C: Alright. *presses button, finishes up order*
CW: *waits until C has left before looking at me*
Me: Yeah, yeah.
There are lots more, and many of them are more entertaining than those, but I have to get ready to go be an overlord. Because, you know, it'd be awesome if that were actually my job title.