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Bear Repellent = Invisibility
Some days, I am astounded by the intelligence of my co-workers. I have some who are absolutely brilliant. And then there's JT.
Short Background: I'm in an office. I process various forms of paperwork for the company with one other guy and four women. Two of the women, JT and KG, often surprise me with odd conversation. I guess it makes sense to them, but I'm often left ready to believe that I could look into a mirror and actually see the question marks floating above my head.
I don't know how the topic came up, but this is part of the general conversation we had today. (The various initials represent the women in the office and BW, the other guy.)
*I walk in from running a short errand.*
TD: ... bear spray.
Me: Bear spray?
KG: Yeah, my friend just told me she got some bear spray for her backpacking trip in Montana next weekend.
TD: So, it's like a repellent or something, right?
Me: Yup. I had one in Yellowstone a few summers ago. It's like a miniature fire extinguisher filled with a powerful pepper spray designed to irritate a bear enough to make it go away instead of attacking.
LK: And you spray it at the bear.
Me: Yeah.
KG: Why would you want to get close enough to a bear to spray it to make it go away?
JT: That doesn't make much sense.
Me: No, you use it if a bear is coming at you like it's going to attack. You spray it at the bear's face and it's supposed to decide you're not worth attacking. Just like the mace you'd use on a mugger.
KG: Oh! Okay.
Me: I once heard of a guy spraying it on himself and complaining to the person he bought it from that it was making his skin burn and didn't understand how it was supposed to keep bears away.
TD: He thought it was like mosquito spray?
Me: Yeah.
TD: Wow.
JT: Well, that sort of makes more sense.
LK: It does?
JT: I mean, wouldn't you want to spray it on yourself to mask whatever smell is making the bear interested in you? You use the spray to cover up those smells, and then you're, like, invisible to bears!
*silence*
Me: Uh... Bears have eyes.
*laughter*
JT: Well, yeah, but...
BW: What, are you going to spray that stuff all over yourself and go up to a bear and be all, "What's up, bear? How do you like me now, huh? Can't see me, bear!"
TD: It'd eat your head!
BW: You could sell that on one of those late-night infomercials! Invisibility spray! But it's only effective against bears.
JT: Oh, jeez.
And for the rest of the afternoon, we tried to come up with jokes about JT's bear invisibility spray.
Short Background: I'm in an office. I process various forms of paperwork for the company with one other guy and four women. Two of the women, JT and KG, often surprise me with odd conversation. I guess it makes sense to them, but I'm often left ready to believe that I could look into a mirror and actually see the question marks floating above my head.
I don't know how the topic came up, but this is part of the general conversation we had today. (The various initials represent the women in the office and BW, the other guy.)
*I walk in from running a short errand.*
TD: ... bear spray.
Me: Bear spray?
KG: Yeah, my friend just told me she got some bear spray for her backpacking trip in Montana next weekend.
TD: So, it's like a repellent or something, right?
Me: Yup. I had one in Yellowstone a few summers ago. It's like a miniature fire extinguisher filled with a powerful pepper spray designed to irritate a bear enough to make it go away instead of attacking.
LK: And you spray it at the bear.
Me: Yeah.
KG: Why would you want to get close enough to a bear to spray it to make it go away?
JT: That doesn't make much sense.
Me: No, you use it if a bear is coming at you like it's going to attack. You spray it at the bear's face and it's supposed to decide you're not worth attacking. Just like the mace you'd use on a mugger.
KG: Oh! Okay.
Me: I once heard of a guy spraying it on himself and complaining to the person he bought it from that it was making his skin burn and didn't understand how it was supposed to keep bears away.
TD: He thought it was like mosquito spray?
Me: Yeah.
TD: Wow.
JT: Well, that sort of makes more sense.
LK: It does?
JT: I mean, wouldn't you want to spray it on yourself to mask whatever smell is making the bear interested in you? You use the spray to cover up those smells, and then you're, like, invisible to bears!
*silence*
Me: Uh... Bears have eyes.
*laughter*
JT: Well, yeah, but...
BW: What, are you going to spray that stuff all over yourself and go up to a bear and be all, "What's up, bear? How do you like me now, huh? Can't see me, bear!"
TD: It'd eat your head!
BW: You could sell that on one of those late-night infomercials! Invisibility spray! But it's only effective against bears.
JT: Oh, jeez.
And for the rest of the afternoon, we tried to come up with jokes about JT's bear invisibility spray.
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