Go back to School...

[Red_Dazes]

I was going to put this in sightings... because, well, as students we are technically customers of our institution... and I believe that blatant stupidity is a very bad form of Suckiness... however, I've decided that it shall fit best here.... Mods feel free to move as necessary.

~Back Story: My little college does a program called "Running Start" High School Juniors and Seniors can attended the community college and earn both H.S credits and college credits. It is an amazing program the state pays for just about everything, I was enrolled in it in H.S, if you play your cards right you can graduate H.S with your A.A degree. I did not because my counselors screwed me over... but that is another rant.... ANYWAY, as you can imagine this means that our campus is relatively over run with H.S kids.... so you never really escape the H.S drama. I have noticed that H.Slers are much less involved in their classes, probably because they aren't paying for it.... they don't have to work at it... etc. ~End Back Story~

My Early American Lit Class has a ratio of 5/1 running start kids to non running start kids. And the level of stupid that leaves their mouths is beginning to make me want to kill myself.

Cast: ((will repeat for every story))
Mr.- Teacher
S1- "Stupid" 1
S2- "Stupid" 2
S3- .... you get the trend
Me- your lovely Red....

REALLY?....Just... really?
We were reading the journal of Mary Rowlandson. Interesting stuff.... she was captured by Indians, it was a 'Captivity Narrative" etc. In class the next day we are discussing our readings. One kid raises his hand and asks the following.

S1- "So I was just wondering... what is a [Wig-Wam]? ((pronounced wig-as in you wear it on your head. Wam as in the sound effect for slamming your face into a wall))
Mr-((with a look of terror)) You mean a wigwam?
S1- Yeah. What is that?
Mr- Uh.... well... the easiest way to describe it would be that it is similar to a Tepee, but it is made of different materials, and they were a different tribe.
S2- then why didn't they just call it a Tepee?
S1- I know... that would make so much more sense.
Me- *face palm*

Nope... Nothing alike at all....
We are discussing the wars with the Indians, and how our culture is similar/different today... when this gem tumbles from the lips of a Running Start student.

S1- "Well we are a lot different from back then with how we fight wars."
Mr- "How so? Technology? strategies?"
S1- "Well yeah those too. But we don't go into to countries and just brutally massacre people now."
**Utter silence from the whole room**
Mr- "Vietnam. Hiroshima. Afghanistan."
S1- "What I mean is we don't go into a village and just kill everyone. Women, children, animals. We fight with armies and don't attack the innocent people."
Me- "Have you read a history book at all? That is EXACTLY what we do."
S1 - "No it's not!"
**Class shakes their head sadly**

Just Pissin me Off

Frequently our teacher will give us a question about the reading we did the night before and section us off into groups to discuss it and come up with an answer. Now... I am in college to earn a degree... I am here to learn... I am not here to socialize nor am I here to be friends. So it really makes me mad when we are supposed to be working on this damn assignment and all EVERYONE in our class is doing is "oh my god did you hear *blah blah blah I'm a stupid child blah blah blah* and makes me even MORE upset when our teacher begins to speak... asks for silence twice... and NO ONE shuts up! Really guys?

Will the Real Ben Franklin please stand up?

This one made me want to scream.
We were assigned to read a few things by Ben Franklin... Namely some excerpts on Poor Richards Almanack. As we were getting ready to leave for the day one student turns to another and asks.

S1- "Ben Franklin?...Isn't he the guy on the $1.00 bill." ((i shit you not it came out of his mouth!))
S2- "Haha! No he was on the $100 bill and invented electricity!"
S3- "Oh yeah! Didn't he come up with the Light Bulb?"
S4- "nah, it was the telephone! Thanks ol' Ben for letting us call each other!"
S5- "He was the President of the United States too right? Man that guy was AWESOME!"
Mr- ((just sitting at his desk looking like he is going to cry))
me- "Oh my god! Really? You guys need to go back to High School and take a god damned history class!" ((I was having a bad day))



There are so many more... EVERY day.... but I just can't bear to remember any more of them. I really will cry.

[Exaspera]

This just makes me want to

Thanks for the stories, though.

[underemployeed]

You have my sympathy I can't imagine how stupid some of those people may be. Of course I hated history and really didn't pay attention and I seemed to know a lot more about American History than my girlfriend at the time who was a history major and had been attending the class for the whole second semester, which at that point had meant it had been AT LEAST 1 year since I did anything history related, actually 2 if you rule out econ and government class and just go for Actual historical events.

You know what they say, learn history or your doomed to repeat it, well it gonna be fun the second time around since I'll feel physic.

[ZedOmega]

The thought that scares me even more is that these are the morons that'll be a part of the workforce soon.

[Exaspera]

The thought that scares me even more is that these are the morons that'll be a part of the workforce soon.

And they'll even VOTE!!!! (maybe not)

[Darkforge]

This one made me want to scream.
We were assigned to read a few things by Ben Franklin... Namely some excerpts on Poor Richards Almanack. As we were getting ready to leave for the day one student turns to another and asks.

S1- "Ben Franklin?...Isn't he the guy on the $1.00 bill." ((i shit you not it came out of his mouth!))
S2- "Haha! No he was on the $100 bill and invented electricity!"
S3- "Oh yeah! Didn't he come up with the Light Bulb?"
S4- "nah, it was the telephone! Thanks ol' Ben for letting us call each other!"
S5- "He was the President of the United States too right? Man that guy was AWESOME!"
Mr- ((just sitting at his desk looking like he is going to cry))
me- "Oh my god! Really? You guys need to go back to High School and take a god damned history class!" ((I was having a bad day))

We learn almost nothing about american history in the UK, but even I know that he was the person who discovered the principle of charge and did the whole kite/lightning storm thing.

as for which dollar bill he's on, heck I couldn't even name who's on the back of the english notes, never mind the american ones.

[Magpie]

I have no clue who's on the Canadian banknotes either. If I want to refer to a bill without saying the denomination I just mention the colour. I like pink .

Is there any kind of academic entry requirement for this programme? i.e. they have to be passing their courses with a 75 average? You know, like regular university admissions? Is there any way for you to recommend such a thing? And the poor poor teachers. I hope they're letting you pick your own groups for any group work, or at least assigning the university level students and the studious running start ones to the same groups.

[Red_Dazes]

as for which dollar bill he's on, heck I couldn't even name who's on the back of the english notes, never mind the american ones.

The thing about that one that makes me mad is, I for the most part know NOTHING about who is on what bill... but in pop culture/youth culture they call $100 bills "Benjamins" for a reason. so even I know that.

I hope they're letting you pick your own groups for any group work, or at least assigning the university level students and the studious running start ones to the same groups.

Nope. He makes us number off into groups... so it is completely random.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Mr- ((just sitting at his desk looking like he is going to cry))

Poor Teacher-Man. He's gonna need a big ol' bottle of Jack one of these days.

I really wanna use your class for a psychology experiment. Really REALLY badly.

[dalesys]

I have no clue who's on the Canadian banknotes either. If I want to refer to a bill without saying the denomination I just mention the colour. I like pink ...

In the States we only get green...

[RetailWorkhorse]

You forgot Peach Tens and of course the Epic Purple Fives, Dale.

[Magpie]

In the States we only get green...

I have some. It looks like play money . (Green here is $20, and back when we had $1).

[AccountingDrone]

S1- "Well we are a lot different from back then with how we fight wars."
Mr- "How so? Technology? strategies?"
S1- "Well yeah those too. But we don't go into to countries and just brutally massacre people now."
**Utter silence from the whole room**
Mr- "Vietnam. Hiroshima. Afghanistan."
S1- "What I mean is we don't go into a village and just kill everyone. Women, children, animals. We fight with armies and don't attack the innocent people."
Me- "Have you read a history book at all? That is EXACTLY what we do."
S1 - "No it's not!"
**Class shakes their head sadly**

I will do my darnedest to not fratch ....

We do not roll in and kill everything living in a village ... even back as far as WW1 we did not roll in and kill entire villages [though animals are another matter, soldiers will shoot dogs if they are aggressive.] Think about it, if we did we would have depopulated Europe several times over [well at least Belgium, Eastern France, Western Germany. I will make no claims about what the Soviet Union did or didn't do towards the end of WW2.] We also did not depopulate southeast asia, or micronesia or the pacific islands, Okinawa or Japan.

In general civilians scarper away from big boomy sounds. To be fratchingly honest, the Japanese army did more depopulating in southeast asia, China, micronesia and the Phillipines than the allied troops did. [Maybe I should call it the PanAsian CoProsperity Sphere]

Though those kids do have a deplorable grasp of simple history they could get from watching movies - fer gosh sakes ... even the Hitler Channel on TV at least has a modicum of WW2 history.

[Mikkel]

We do not roll in and kill everything living in a village

It has happened, remember My Lai?
It's not an official policy, though, and is a scandal when it hit the news.
The firebombing of Dresden was official policy of course.

[XCashier]

In the States we only get green...

Not any more.