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I love her to bits, but sometimes...

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  • I love her to bits, but sometimes...

    This isn't about customers, but it is one drink fuelled burp.

    I finished at 10pm on Sat and was opening the store for staff Sunday morning. So I went out for a couple of bevvies before going home. Into bed around midnight thinking "7 hours kip will be plenty."

    I'm settled in having a nice little dream when my phone goes. I have a look and it's a girlfriend of mine R.

    I look at the time and think something serious must have happened, so I answer.

    B: "Hey, everything OK?"
    R: (drunk as a lord)"Oh, everything great, I'm just calling to tell you I got your present today*. Have you decided what we're doing for your birthday yet?"
    B:"My birthday? You know it's still three weeks away?"
    R:"Yeah."
    B:"And you know I told you I have to be in for 8:00?"
    R:"Yes."
    B:"And you know it's 3AM right now?!!!?!"
    Rial tone...


    *She sounded so excited about my present, I'm kinda worried. She's started up her own business a few years ago making body jewellery. Last year we were in a cafe for a birthday breakfast and sh slid a small box across the table.

    I opened it and inside was a braided gold ring. It looked lovely but...

    B:"It's gorgeous thank you, but that'll never fit on my finger."
    R:...
    B:...
    R:...
    B:..."Ah hell no!"

  • #2
    Quoth Bunny the Veggie Slayer View Post
    B:..."Ah hell no!"
    Indeed, what if it fell off .

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    • #3
      It took me a good three minutes to understand what was going on here. *hides*
      There had to be DUMB in the water today. - Summerfly413

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      • #4
        Quoth AtDIelement View Post
        It took me a good three minutes to understand what was going on here. *hides*
        Don't worry. It took me a few read throughs too.
        "Honestly officer, he asked for a shot and I gave him one. Why do you need the handcuffs?" - MannersMakethMan

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        • #5

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          • #6
            Quoth KMMCurly View Post
            Don't worry. It took me a few read throughs too.
            You know I only posted to show off how fast I got it .
            But I'm sure Bunny looked ravishing with his gold ring on .

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            • #7
              Um, wait, it goes WHERE???

              God, I'm living a sheltered life....
              When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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              • #8
                Ok, the reason it took me a long time to get that was because I saw "it'll never fit on my finger" and immediately thought "too small". Aren't you glad that I couldn't figure it out?

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                • #9
                  I love your response in your original post.
                  "Is it the lie that keeps you sane? Is this the lie that keeps you sane?What is it?Can it be?Ought it to exist?"
                  "...and may it be that I cleave to the ugly truth, rather than the beautiful lie..."

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