I'm on Candid Camera, aren't I.

[Shironu-Akaineko]

Short and sweet, this happened last night.

Unfortunate boyfriend (UB) and Squeaky Clueless girl (SCG) walk in.
Now this girl does NOT shut up. NEVER. I'm surprised she wasn't blue in the face because I did not hear pauses between her words.

SCG: Aw, THIS is boring! This is BOOOOORING! I'm a huge Horror fan and *turns to me* I'VE NEVER FALLEN ASLEEP DURING A HORROR MOVIE and I fell asleep within 5 minutes of this! *points to Paranormal Activity 2* I can't believe people are afraid of this! nothing happens!

Me: Well, the Paranormal Activity movies base themselves not on what they show, but what they don't show. They depend on audience reaction. Some will find it boring while others will imagine themselves in a terror.

UB: *doesn't say anything, but has a look of understanding in his face*

SCG: Well nothing happened! So it's BOOOOORIIIIIING. Suggest me some good horror movies!

Me: (Note I haven't WATCHED a single horror movie in my life and Army of Darkness does not count. However, I devour Wikipedia and IMDB entries on the subject) Well, first I have to think of movies that came out after the 80's, which is a little hard seeing as I enjoy the old stuff.

UB: *shows her Original Nightmare on Elm Street* How about this?

SCG: *scoff* Freddy Krueger? Like WHAT-EVER! He's BOOOOOORING!!! I've watched them all!

Me: *twitch* Okay, so...

SCG: I've seen the Exorcist too! BOOOOOORING!!!

Me: *Twitch twitch*

SCG: The exorcist of Emily Rose however, that was GOOD! I'M a huge Horror movie fan! I've seen them all!

Me: *twitch twitch twitch* So, what kind of Horror do you like?

SCG: Well, I don't like Action movies or adventure movies! BUT I like Pirates of the Carribean. Johnny Depp is hot.

Me: Then you probably like Tim Burton movies?

SCG: Um, NO? Johnny Depp's not hot in those movies!

Me: *TWITCH*

UB: Hey, how about this? *Holding Hostel 3*

Me: Well, it depends. If you want a story, then no. If you want Gore, then it's perfect.

SCG: Um, what's gore?

Hubbu.... habba.... WHAT? You come here, claim you're such a horror movie fan with your Minnie Mouse voice, bash CLASSICS in my face and you don't know what GORE is?!? I'm a bigger horror movie fan than you and I haven't seen a single one! What is WRONG with you????

Here, have some Manos: Hands of Fate and get out. Door's to your left.

Maybe Torgo can pound some sense into your skull.

[Seshat]

Unfortunate Boyfriend (and possibly you) would probably like The Others.

[Slayer]

My brain keeps going: "wow, that's, wow, that's just, whoa" over and over again.

I'm a HUGE horror fan and yes, I rarely get scared, but I've yet to say one is boring o_O

Lame, sure, but never boring lol. Not all horror is supposed to make you scream, anyway.

She was no horror fan, that's for sure.

[Ironclad Alibi]

The next time SCG comes in asking for a horror movie, suggest Alien. That was a horror movie.

[pzychobitch]

I'd suggest the Justin Bieber movie. Seems to be her cup of tea.

[Ironclad Alibi]

I'd suggest the Justin Bieber movie. Seems to be her cup of tea.

Or any of the Twilight movies.

[Salted Grump]

I second Alien; there's a reason my dad called it a popcorn movie. 'If you haven't eaten all the popcorn in the first half-hour, it'll be all over the room'

[wraiths_crono]

OMG... Somehow my ex cloned herself... That is really all I can say gah! Hated being with her about horror films esp because she was never scared by em just bored!