My mouth runs away with me

[SuperRTL]

So, I'm working my way to the back this morning. Don't really remember why but, as the backroom is my demesne, it was probably for something work related.

A man who looks very annoyed stops me.
Cast of characters:
Me:
AM: annoyed man
BL: boss lady

I notice a very annoyed looking man heading toward the Employees Only sign. He looks ready to yell. Me, being the glutton for punishment that I am, stops him.

Me: Can I help you, sir?
AM: I can't find the patches
Me: well, it looks like you just passed them. What kind were you looking for?
AM: What kind? I'm looking for patches!
Me: Yes, sir, we carry several different kinds of patches, what did you want to do with them?
AM: I want to iron them on my clothes.
Me: Okay, sir, did you want decorative patches or -
AM: No, I just want iron on patches.
Me: Yes, sir, what do you want to iron on to your clothes? Are you trying to fix something? Decorate something?
AM: I've got a hole in my goddammed pants!
Me: Ah, ok, you've passed what you were looking for. Go to the center aisles and go just one aisle up. It's in the aisle with the big pole in it. The one holding up the ceiling.
AM: Which aisle?
Me: That one *pointing* the one with the structural support directly in the middle of it. The patches are next to the pole.
AM: That's not where the girls up front pointed me.
Me: They likely directed you to the decorative patches, which we're standing next to. Just go to that aisle and you can't miss it.
AM stomps off and. . . past the aisle with the very large pole sticking out of it
Me: Unless, apparently, you're a moron.

I turn around to see the Boss Lady laughing. She heard the whole thing.

Me: Um, yeah, shouldn't have said that.
BL: No, he deserved it, I've just never heard you say anything like it.
Me: So, not mad?
BL: Nope, amused as hell, not mad.

[ShadowTiger]

Sounds a lot like what some of the people at my locale of workathonning (Firefox autospellcheck didn't think a thing of "workathonning" ._O' ) do often enough. Generally, the more generic they are, the less help they get. Then they walk right past the place regardless.

However, my store has all aisles (Except two.) labeled quite well. Aisle 21, Aisle 33, etc. It's easy to just not look up at the signs, but I still can't imagine how people can miss them.



I also do blurt out occasional .. er .. professional inconsistencies. Sometimes I'm doing many things at once, and instead of "Hi, how are you?" I would indeed say "How hi are you?" And they would completely ignore it and say the one-word phrase depicting their sole reason for getting out of bed that day.

[SuperRTL]

I screamed at someone once. Not on purpose, though. I was pushing two very noisy carts pretty quickly through the store and I couldn't hear anything else going on. This guy says "excuse me" right in my ear and I shriek. He swears I jumped at least a foot off the ground, too.

I tend to answer questions before people ask them, too. That's always a neat trick. Or tell people they've gone an aisle too far when it's quite obvious to them that I'm not paying attention.