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Yesterday (Saturday) might have been one of the greatest days of my life. I discovered a very good Vietnamese resturant, I received Casino Royale as a gift, and a work-related headache is gone: No more Fucking Patrick!! 
At my place of employment, Fucking Patrick (FP) is (was) the shipper-receiver. Why do I call him Fucking Patrick, you ask? Simple. The man could throw Mother Teresa into a fit of blind screaming rage, and she's been dead for 10 years. I haven't posted much about him, because during the school year, I'll only work with him for about 5 hours a week. This makes him very easy to ignore, but my cowrokers do not have it so lucky. They have to deal with a man who is lazy, incompetant, unwilling to learn, bossy, racist, misogynistic (spelling?), redneck, unhygenic, and completely lacking in any sort of social tact whatsoever. I have asked my girlfriend to not come in when he is working, and I get embarrassed when he talks to customers or other people who work at the dealership.
He would randomly join in conversation that my co-workers would be having, and say something to the effect of "It needs to be shot/blown up/paved over." A typical exchange:
M-a recent emigrant from Ontario who is trying to explore as much of Alberta as possible
Me-you handsome and sauve partsman extraordinaire
FP-Fucking Patrick
M: Yeah, me and the wife went to Elk Island National Park and went hiking on the weekend
***Note: Elk Island National Park is one of only two spots in Alberta where wild bison are allowed to graze freely. This park contains two different species of bison that are kept seperately, a campsite and picnic area, and is located about 1 hour east of Edmonton.***
Me: Oh, yeah? How was that for you?
M: Wild! I didn't think that they would be so big. And it's crazy that there are still bison here! We didn't see any elk, though...that's kinda disappionting.
*FP wanders by, mid-conversation*
FP: You know why you didn't see any elk?
Mark: No, why?
FP: Cuz I took out my .457 Magnum (Or whatever crap munitions he's claiming he had imported this week...
) with the laser sight to the park last weekend, and BOOM! No more elk. It's only poaching if ou get caught!
Me & M: Uh, right...*We get back to work*
FP also has an unnatural odour that could knock a cat off a gutwagon--especially in the summer. A co-worker actually bought some soap and body spray for him, but that didn't change anything. Finally, one girl (I'll call her K) got sick and tired of complaining about it to no effect, and went to her (and my) bosses boss. This guy went to ask FP about his BO...and immeadiently got written up for smelling so bad. Oddly, FP went around the dealership afterwards and asked anyone who would listen if he smelled bad...and then promptly told the poor bastard that he got written up for stinking like rotten ball sweat.
One other tale to help explain what a fine member of society FP is. A month ago or so, on a Thursday, we ordered in a $350 module for a customer. It should arrive Friday morning. Friday morning rolls around, and we need to get the aforementioned module. We can't find it, so we ask our shipper/receiver if we've received it. He admitted to checking it in, and he remembers having it in his hand...but then he lost it. It wasn't in the normal location, it wasn't in the special order bin. It was nowhere. We had three people-M, K, and D-looking for it, in two different buildings. Can't be seen. So my co-worker S goes back to where FP's desk is, and sees him just sitting there, doing nothing. So S asks FP what he's doing. FP replies that there is nothing for him to do right then. S (bless him) LAYS into FP and tells him to look for this module. (S was our previous shipper/receiver, and he claims that it's a pretty easy job.) Module is not found, module gets re-ordered for Saturady...only to have FP lose the goddamn module once more!
That all helps to set the scene, but this is the straw that broke the camels back. K-the girl who complained about the unholy stink-wants to eventually join the RCMP. She's small physically, but tough as nails. FP doesn't think that females should become cops. Period. No exceptions.
It's lunchtime earlier this week, and FP is up in the cafe getting lunch, when he hears a group of people talking about the subject of female police officers. The cafe is a business-within-a-business, and is open to the public as well as employees. Customers will often go there to eat while they are getting their car worked on or while waiting for financing to go through. FP, using his fine social grace, joins the conversation in progress. (Text is roughly paraphrased, but the general point and his aside at the end are the critical and accurate points)
"Oh, I don't think that chick should be allowed to be cops. I mean, what the fuck are they going to do if some big drunk fucking Indian wants to kick their ass? Then they are no good as police officers." FP then turned around to a NATIVE PERSON SITTING IN THE CAFE and said, "No offence."
Naturally, both the Native customer and several emplyees complained to the Boss of Bosses, and rightly so. Now you can understand why I'm so thrilled that FP is gone--and maybe you'll understand why I typed up one of my longest posts EVER on the boards on this subject.
At my place of employment, Fucking Patrick (FP) is (was) the shipper-receiver. Why do I call him Fucking Patrick, you ask? Simple. The man could throw Mother Teresa into a fit of blind screaming rage, and she's been dead for 10 years. I haven't posted much about him, because during the school year, I'll only work with him for about 5 hours a week. This makes him very easy to ignore, but my cowrokers do not have it so lucky. They have to deal with a man who is lazy, incompetant, unwilling to learn, bossy, racist, misogynistic (spelling?), redneck, unhygenic, and completely lacking in any sort of social tact whatsoever. I have asked my girlfriend to not come in when he is working, and I get embarrassed when he talks to customers or other people who work at the dealership.
He would randomly join in conversation that my co-workers would be having, and say something to the effect of "It needs to be shot/blown up/paved over." A typical exchange:
M-a recent emigrant from Ontario who is trying to explore as much of Alberta as possible
Me-you handsome and sauve partsman extraordinaire
FP-Fucking Patrick
M: Yeah, me and the wife went to Elk Island National Park and went hiking on the weekend
***Note: Elk Island National Park is one of only two spots in Alberta where wild bison are allowed to graze freely. This park contains two different species of bison that are kept seperately, a campsite and picnic area, and is located about 1 hour east of Edmonton.***
Me: Oh, yeah? How was that for you?
M: Wild! I didn't think that they would be so big. And it's crazy that there are still bison here! We didn't see any elk, though...that's kinda disappionting.
*FP wanders by, mid-conversation*
FP: You know why you didn't see any elk?
Mark: No, why?
FP: Cuz I took out my .457 Magnum (Or whatever crap munitions he's claiming he had imported this week...
) with the laser sight to the park last weekend, and BOOM! No more elk. It's only poaching if ou get caught!Me & M: Uh, right...*We get back to work*
FP also has an unnatural odour that could knock a cat off a gutwagon--especially in the summer. A co-worker actually bought some soap and body spray for him, but that didn't change anything. Finally, one girl (I'll call her K) got sick and tired of complaining about it to no effect, and went to her (and my) bosses boss. This guy went to ask FP about his BO...and immeadiently got written up for smelling so bad. Oddly, FP went around the dealership afterwards and asked anyone who would listen if he smelled bad...and then promptly told the poor bastard that he got written up for stinking like rotten ball sweat.
One other tale to help explain what a fine member of society FP is. A month ago or so, on a Thursday, we ordered in a $350 module for a customer. It should arrive Friday morning. Friday morning rolls around, and we need to get the aforementioned module. We can't find it, so we ask our shipper/receiver if we've received it. He admitted to checking it in, and he remembers having it in his hand...but then he lost it. It wasn't in the normal location, it wasn't in the special order bin. It was nowhere. We had three people-M, K, and D-looking for it, in two different buildings. Can't be seen. So my co-worker S goes back to where FP's desk is, and sees him just sitting there, doing nothing. So S asks FP what he's doing. FP replies that there is nothing for him to do right then. S (bless him) LAYS into FP and tells him to look for this module. (S was our previous shipper/receiver, and he claims that it's a pretty easy job.) Module is not found, module gets re-ordered for Saturady...only to have FP lose the goddamn module once more!
That all helps to set the scene, but this is the straw that broke the camels back. K-the girl who complained about the unholy stink-wants to eventually join the RCMP. She's small physically, but tough as nails. FP doesn't think that females should become cops. Period. No exceptions.
It's lunchtime earlier this week, and FP is up in the cafe getting lunch, when he hears a group of people talking about the subject of female police officers. The cafe is a business-within-a-business, and is open to the public as well as employees. Customers will often go there to eat while they are getting their car worked on or while waiting for financing to go through. FP, using his fine social grace, joins the conversation in progress. (Text is roughly paraphrased, but the general point and his aside at the end are the critical and accurate points)
"Oh, I don't think that chick should be allowed to be cops. I mean, what the fuck are they going to do if some big drunk fucking Indian wants to kick their ass? Then they are no good as police officers." FP then turned around to a NATIVE PERSON SITTING IN THE CAFE and said, "No offence."
Naturally, both the Native customer and several emplyees complained to the Boss of Bosses, and rightly so. Now you can understand why I'm so thrilled that FP is gone--and maybe you'll understand why I typed up one of my longest posts EVER on the boards on this subject.
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