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The Thanksgiving Day newspaper is the largest newspaper of the year due to all the Black Friday ads. Last year, we barely squeezed the newspapers into the large Sunday plastic sleeves. A few years ago, they wouldn't even fit, forcing us to split them into two bags and tie them together creating "newspaper nunchucks".
Now, in a past life, when we received Sunday newspapers (typically comparable to the Thanksgiving Day papers), they would be already assembled so we could just bag 'em and throw 'em. Then they couldn't afford to keep enough inserters, so the newspapers now come with the news sections and ad sections bundled separately, which we must unbundle and assemble before delivering. It's annoying and takes a lot longer, but you can still fit them side by side on your car seat so you can assemble as you go.
This Thanksgiving, we've been told that we will have not one separate ad bundle but two separate ad bundles. That's three different sections for us to assemble total. That's just an obscenely huge newspaper right there. Just kill me now. My car is already loaded to the limit as it is on Sundays...I have no clue how to even fit an extra set of bundles in, let alone how to organize and arrange them for easy assembly.
I'm also dubious as to if they'll even fit into the newspaper boxes for my customers that have them.
I placed my order for the extra-large bags they're offering for the day, and I also tried to requisition a bus to carry it all. I plan on having pumpkin pie and booze on stand-by for when I finally finish the route (you think I can write those off as a business expense?). It's gonna take forever trying to juggle three sections. Oof.
On the plus side, the newspapers are going to be super heavy, and they'll probably wake up and freak out some customers when they start landing on porches at 4am. (That's a "plus side" because I'm a bit of a sadistic bitch like that.)
Now, in a past life, when we received Sunday newspapers (typically comparable to the Thanksgiving Day papers), they would be already assembled so we could just bag 'em and throw 'em. Then they couldn't afford to keep enough inserters, so the newspapers now come with the news sections and ad sections bundled separately, which we must unbundle and assemble before delivering. It's annoying and takes a lot longer, but you can still fit them side by side on your car seat so you can assemble as you go.
This Thanksgiving, we've been told that we will have not one separate ad bundle but two separate ad bundles. That's three different sections for us to assemble total. That's just an obscenely huge newspaper right there. Just kill me now. My car is already loaded to the limit as it is on Sundays...I have no clue how to even fit an extra set of bundles in, let alone how to organize and arrange them for easy assembly.
I'm also dubious as to if they'll even fit into the newspaper boxes for my customers that have them. I placed my order for the extra-large bags they're offering for the day, and I also tried to requisition a bus to carry it all. I plan on having pumpkin pie and booze on stand-by for when I finally finish the route (you think I can write those off as a business expense?). It's gonna take forever trying to juggle three sections. Oof.
On the plus side, the newspapers are going to be super heavy, and they'll probably wake up and freak out some customers when they start landing on porches at 4am. (That's a "plus side" because I'm a bit of a sadistic bitch like that.)
Crap, which would *not* fit behind several of my customers' screen doors!
The homeowner goes out to get the paper and finds a rather large dent in the front wall...and the wall is made of brick!
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