Amusing Conversations at Work

[Jay 2K Winger]

So, my work week runs Sun-Thu. I have Fridays and Saturdays off. Everyone in the office knows this.

So imagine my surprise when my coworker DLT says this--

DLT: "Jay, you don't work Fridays, do you?"
J2K: "Nope."
DLT: "So... what are you doing here?"
J2K: "...? What do you mean?"
DLT: "...wait, it's Friday, isn't it?"
J2K: "No..? It's Tuesday."

Somehow, DLT had lost track of what day it was pretty badly. We all burst out laughing over it and she had a good sense of humor about it.

Any other amusing conversations from your workplace worth sharing?

[Food Lady]

The other day my supervisor told me if I got a credit app she'd give me a coupon for a free "soda"--with a picture of a wine glass on it. She said she'd ring a wine in under an open stock number so we don't get caught. I think the joke came out of the fact that I don't really eat candy, and was looking for an alternative prize. I can see it now: me walking around with one of those mini wine boxes (like a juice box), sipping from a straw.

[notalwaysright]

Not so much a conversation as just funny. The truck was huge this week, and there was no place to put anything, especially fabric. So I hear this:

"More fabric? All right, that's it. I'm burning it down. Everyone out."

[Aria]

Partially overheard conversation between a man and a woman.

Woman: "...And everyone knows you're gay anyway."

Man: "How did you...? Do I have it tattoed on my forehead?"

Woman: "No, but you've definitely got that vibe going."

He really did too.

[XCashier]

Not so much a conversation as just funny. The truck was huge this week, and there was no place to put anything, especially fabric. So I hear this:

"More fabric? All right, that's it. I'm burning it down. Everyone out."

Oddly enough, we didn't get our truck today and we were supposed to. The store in Nexttown, about eight miles away, got their truck but our shipment wasn't on it. I found that extremely strange because the two shipments always come on the same truck, it makes sense and saves fuel.

Still, it was a blessing in disguise. We were able to get a lot of the old stock put out on the floor, especially in notions which had far too many empty pegs. We're supposed to get our shipment tomorrow, and if we don't, we'll stock more of the back stock! It would be cool to get the entire stock room emptied before the next truck, though I know that's highly unlikely at this time of the year.

Back OT, "that's what she said" has become our running joke when customers aren't around.

"That was fast!" "That's what she said!"
"Whoa, I can't get a grip on this!" "That's what she said!"

[otter]

After coming in to work during lunch (I was in class for the week) and almost getting run over by one of the sergeants:

Him: Sorry!
Me: Its ok!
Him: Its 'cause you're invisible in civvies. You're not a real person.
Me: haha, ok!??

[raudf]

When I worked at the Mart of Wal, one of the oddest conversations was two of my garden center co-workers (I was cashier) trying to get the small forklift working because some idiot put the heavier Xmas trees on the high risers. I heard one say, "Okay, you think management would mind if I drove this thing up one of the trees to be used as an ornament? That's about all it's useful for right now."

The other responded, "Eh, not really. I think that our dept manager would prefer you do that to the scissor lift. It's already leaving trails of glitter everywhere and likely will for the next year." A customer had manage to sneak past my fellow cashier, who was suppose to watch for customers near it when it was in operation, and placed a canister of glitter in the "lift" portion of the thing. The platform lowers and the canister explodes. It was seriously leaving trails of glitter for a couple of months after that.

[dalesys]

... placed a canister of glitter ...

We have a suspect not doing christmas cards this year... Eric!

[wolfie]

Woman: "...And everyone knows you're gay anyway."

Man: "How did you...? Do I have it tattoed on my forehead?"

Woman: "No, but you've definitely got that vibe going."

If he'd got a Matrix going instead, would that mean he was straight?

[MoonCat]

I can see it now: me walking around with one of those mini wine boxes (like a juice box), sipping from a straw.

Wine comes in those????

[mhkohne]

Wine comes in those????

I can't find any, but I did find wine pre-packed in glasses, and a couple of variations on the box:
http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/inst...ngle-servings/

[wolfie]

I've seen wine pre-packed in glasses. It was a few years ago, at Flynn's in Massachussets. Flynn's is a TRUCK STOP.

[dawnfire]

for myself it's great idea. I don't drink much. I may have 2 glasses a year (1 at Christmas, 1 at New Year)

[Food Lady]

I had a nice conversation with a Danish lady today. She was buying candy for her friends for Christmas and we got to talking about food. I told her I wished she'd take me home with her so I could sample Danish pastries...and cheese. She said, "Oh, but the cheese here is good, too!" I guess it is, since I live in the dairy state. I just thought I'd share because she was a pleasure to talk to and it really brightened my day. And now I want to visit Denmark!

[Mikkel]

And now I want to visit Denmark!

Do that . I don't know if our humdrum pastries are so nice, the Danish pastries you get in USA are much more interesting.
Our "smørrebrød" though...