1.) The scene: I'm at the neonatal ICU at the hospital to meet a kid who's just been assigned to me.
Me: Hi, I'm antisocial_worker from Dark Corner County, here to see Namela Namerson, baby girl from Dark Corner, born last week?
Nurse: I'm not seeing that name...
Me: She was born addicted to amphetamines, methamphetamine, and about three other drugs.
Nurse: You'll need to be more specific.
2.) Our primary CPS investigator is a colorful sort of lady. Last week was a total bitch of a week in which 7 kids were taken into custody. Our colorful lady reached her breaking point, stepped out into the hall and announced to the department at large at the top of her lungs, "I have half a damn mind to grab my pocketbook, grab my crotch, and ride my hand right the hell out of this nuthouse!"
Me: Hi, I'm antisocial_worker from Dark Corner County, here to see Namela Namerson, baby girl from Dark Corner, born last week?
Nurse: I'm not seeing that name...
Me: She was born addicted to amphetamines, methamphetamine, and about three other drugs.
Nurse: You'll need to be more specific.
2.) Our primary CPS investigator is a colorful sort of lady. Last week was a total bitch of a week in which 7 kids were taken into custody. Our colorful lady reached her breaking point, stepped out into the hall and announced to the department at large at the top of her lungs, "I have half a damn mind to grab my pocketbook, grab my crotch, and ride my hand right the hell out of this nuthouse!"
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