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What exactly is their hiring policy? The deranged and evil? Rant

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  • What exactly is their hiring policy? The deranged and evil? Rant

    Now the first thing that happens when I get to work is I see my good friend frantically racing around the copier. To clarify, she is the supervisor for the customer side of production at blah blah Max's Printing department. She tells me that the last shift knew that there was a set of forty five books, due last night or early this same morning, that had to be done, and did nothing. These books are 800+ pages and she has started them at seven am. She is on book six when I get there at nine am. So already that is pretty rough.

    She is the only one there from her department because the gentleman that was supposed to be there with her called forty minutes after his shift started to say he would be late. This entire two hours she has been doing books and minding customers. Since the corporate printing that I do has been a little slow, I told her I would mind the front. I used to work that department and know where pretty much everything is.

    First customer comes in. A job that I had mentioned to one of her coworkers has not been done. I call him to ask him where he put the file that he told me he would make so that the evening crew could print the labels. He tells me he thought I was talking about telling them where some labels were. (All labels in our department are labeled)

    Her coworker comes in at eleven, when his shift started at nine and doesn't even bother with an apology. She tells him that he was supposed to be in during the opening shift. He says " I am on opening shift. I was here when I opened my eyes." Now, I am displeased at the fact that I had to do his job and he has shown absolutely no remorse for putting her in a bad spot. He has put me behind as well and I let him know that. He says "Oh poor you. You had to work the front." We didn't kill him, but I did offer to find somewhere to dump the body when she was done. She told me she would definitely consider it.

  • #2
    Quoth TheKit10666 View Post
    We didn't kill him, but I did offer to find somewhere to dump the body when she was done. She told me she would definitely consider it.
    Need a hand? If that's his remark to being blatantly late, then I say hang him from the ceiling as an example to others.
    I AM the evil bastard!
    A+ Certified IT Technician

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    • #3
      If only. He has so many black marks to his name, I am pretty sure he gets to stay because of his "disability". It does not disable him in any physical way, only social, but apparently that is enough.

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      • #4
        Hmm, since you don't have oranges, I would suggest a clandestine beating with a static-free bag full of stress balls (or register tape). That taking being an asstuba to a whole new level.
        The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
        "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
        Hoc spatio locantur.

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        • #5
          Quoth Geek King View Post
          Hmm, since you don't have oranges, I would suggest a clandestine beating with a static-free bag full of stress balls (or register tape). That taking being an asstuba to a whole new level.
          Why static free? Give him the full effect, static included, and let him zap himself on metal all day long!
          Jim: Fact: Bears eat beets. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Gallactica.
          Dwight: Bears don't eat bee... Hey! What are you doing?
          The Office

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          • #6
            Quoth Shabo View Post
            Why static free? Give him the full effect, static included, and let him zap himself on metal all day long!
            I was just going with what they might have handy in an office supply store. Of course, the proper way to do it is a pillowcase full of oranges.
            The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
            "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
            Hoc spatio locantur.

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth lordlundar View Post
              Need a hand? If that's his remark to being blatantly late, then I say hang him from the ceiling as an example to others.
              I beleive the term is "Nail his ass to the WALL!" other fine examples:
              Take his head off, Mount in breakroom as a warning to others.
              Attach a noose to the ceiling fan and set it on HIGH
              Slam his head in the copier, gets rid of the problem and you have a "XEROX" of the moment to keep as a momento.
              Box him up and "transfer" him to another store. Forget to poke air holes.
              Consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
              The following is subject to change:
              If Your Going Through Hell,
              Keep Going...

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              • #8
                The powers that be should have fired his non-considerate ass. I know it would be difficult cause of the help but I would fire him the second new help arrives.

                He says " I am on opening shift. I was here when I opened my eyes."
                I hope to god he was joking or I would have fired him the second he said that. What a douche.

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                • #9
                  Quoth Shabo View Post
                  Why static free? Give him the full effect, static included, and let him zap himself on metal all day long!
                  sometimes i feel like i'm in the movie Office Space...no, seriously, who took my stapler...

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Lady Heather View Post
                    I beleive the term is "Nail his ass to the WALL!"
                    Ahh, but nailing his ass to the wall can get you in trouble for wasting valuable product space. It's rare product gets hanged from the ceiling though.
                    I AM the evil bastard!
                    A+ Certified IT Technician

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth lordlundar View Post
                      Need a hand? If that's his remark to being blatantly late, then I say hang him from the ceiling as an example to others.
                      I prefer telling the offender to go play in the trash compactor.

                      "Yeah, there's something jamming up the works in there. Crawl in there and check it out!" RIN-NIN NIN NIN NIN....SPLUT
                      Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                      "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                        I prefer telling the offender to go play in the trash compactor.

                        "Yeah, there's something jamming up the works in there. Crawl in there and check it out!" RIN-NIN NIN NIN NIN....SPLUT
                        That doesn't actually work though, because most of the time garbage is skooshy, so they just get mooshed into the garbage. They might have broken bone or two, but that's all. Take Shredder from the TMNT movies.
                        Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                        http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Broomjockey View Post
                          That doesn't actually work though, because most of the time garbage is skooshy, so they just get mooshed into the garbage. They might have broken bone or two, but that's all. Take Shredder from the TMNT movies.
                          I prefer the Darwin Awards myself, but it is similar. It's about a 50/50 chance the target, er victim actually dies, and it's more likely from asphyxiation than anything else.
                          I AM the evil bastard!
                          A+ Certified IT Technician

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