I think you are lying to me

[portia911]

Bloody telemarketers for charity drive me demented. It's always something outrageously overpriced for kids and everyone knows it's a great big con but still they call and call and call. This latest one really took the cake

BT - Bloody Telemarketer
Me - Child loathing tight wad

Me- welcome to blah blah, this is Jane how can I help
BT - Hi Jane (insert endless speil about the weather, my day etc trying to get me to say yes three times) We are organising a special day out for all the terminally ill kiddies in your region and we'd like your support for the last 6 we have left on our list so they don't miss out on this wonderful event.
Me - Oh how sad
BT - Yes it's only $40 a head for each of them to attend a magic show. Can we count on your support?
Me - 40 Bucks?! Each?! Are you flying then to Vegas to see David Copperfeild live?
BT - we have nearly 2000 children going and we need your generous support to make sure the last 6 can go too.
Me - 2000 you say. Are you trying to tell me there are 2000 terminally ill children in my area of barely 100,000 people?
BT - Yes
Me - So your trying to tell me nearly 10 percent of all the children in my region have a terminal illness?
BT - (realising they are being rumbled) ummmmmm
Me - Does the Government know about this? What organisation did you say you were calling from?
BT -Ummmmmm.

Click and the line goes dead on me.

[tropicsgoddess]

You really put him in the corner...and that little spiel sounded off too (on the sucky telemarketer's part).

[Gerrinson]

There was a charity group that kept calling over and over and over for the previous owner of my best friend's phone number when we were roommates. At the time, we were both unemployed, so obviously not in a position to go giving away a 'minimum $100 donation.' By the way, what kind of legit group has a minimum donation, period?

I admit I was pretty sucky the final time they called. They asked me how I could refuse money to children with cancer. My answer was...

WARNING! WARNING! This is really inflammatory and should NOT be read by anyone who thinks it might offend them! I was at my wit's end having received 5+ calls PER DAY 6 days a week from these jackasses...



Seriously, don't read this.

Not kidding.

Stop now.



Question: How can you refuse money to children with cancer?

Answer: I feel that cancer is a form of natural selection attempting to improve the human race. If they have cancer they should die and stop wasting resources that could be used by the healthy people.

Apparently, that is what it takes to get them to stop calling and asking for money. Just saying that you support cancer over children suffering from cancer. Who knew?

[PCGameGuy]

This reminds me of the one I got for cancer insurance.

'Sir, for just x.xx a month you can get this insurance. With cancer being such a major cause of deaths in this country, don't you feel you need this?'

'No, in my family we are all big drinkers, and the liver takes us out long before cancer can.'

....aaaand, he had no real response.

Although, he did tell us that it was free for 60 days, and he could send us the package in the mail, feel free to cancel after 60 days at no cost.

.......cancer insurance....60 day free trial.... what the hell is in that package you are sending?

[sld72382]

You really put him in the corner...and that little spiel sounded off too (on the sucky telemarketer's part).

Are you talking about the telemarketer asking about the weather and the day and all that jazz? Sure the telemarketer was sucky, but mindlessly asking about the weather and other crap means that his call center is like mine - QA wants him/her to attempt to build a rapport with every caller, even on ones where it seems out of place.

It's annoying, but just want to say that when a CSR or telemarketer asks you those questions, it's purely to satisfy the quality managers.

[KhirasHY]

I know I should feel bad, but I actually enjoy telemarketers. Most people try to creep them out by being offensive...I could talk to a telemarketer all day without stopping.

I'm much creepier than the average person you call, I just have too much free time.

[Anriana]

Are you talking about the telemarketer asking about the weather and the day and all that jazz? Sure the telemarketer was sucky, but mindlessly asking about the weather and other crap means that his call center is like mine - QA wants him/her to attempt to build a rapport with every caller, even on ones where it seems out of place.

It's annoying, but just want to say that when a CSR or telemarketer asks you those questions, it's purely to satisfy the quality managers.

Our QA doesn't require it and I know plenty of reps who think people calling in for tech support are secretly calling in because they want to talk about the weather/hear exciting stories about tech support's personal lives. I usually try and avoid these people.

[portia911]

I thought it was a tactic. If you ask people if they are having a good day, enjoying the weather etc, it's a way of trying to get them to say yes 3 times and they are much more likey to say yes to what your request is

[Record Store Tough Guy]

That's weird. Just because I say yes to innocuous questions doesn't mean I'm more liable to give a complete stranger money over the phone. I have my own charities I support. If you call me, and I'm not expecting your call, you get nothing! Good day sir!

Lolz. But yeah, a complete stranger calling and getting chummy with me immediately sets off warning flags, as it's a common tactic of salesmen and con men. I usually pull the "actually, no, I don't care, I'm a heartless bastard" tactic on them, too.

[Jay 2K Winger]

This reminds me of a way my mom dealt with a telemarketer once.

This was probably seventeen years ago. My father was working for a company that dealt in telecommunications, and offered long-distance telephone service. A certain other long-distance telephone company was in the habit of calling up people who had the competing company's service and trying to persuade them to switch to them.

And they called up my mom one evening. And she just led them on, seemingly hemming and hawing about whether or not she should switch, she's just not sure, that sounds like a good deal, but I just don't think I can switch companies, and on and on and on, just wasting the telemarketer's time.

TM: "Well, ma'am, can I ask just why you are so hesitant to switch to [telephone company]?"
Mom: "Well, my husband works for [rival telephone company]."
TM: "Sorry to have wasted your time, ma'am." *click*

I still laugh about it to this day.

[csdrone]

My favorite TM story came from my days at the newspaper Hi Mysty! I was in a support department and was friends with a bunch of nice people in Operations (the telemarketing guy being one such person) as part of my job. So I get a call from a TM for our paper. The first call I was sort of polite to: "I work there and I get my papers for free" ended the conversation and I also put my number on the internal DNC list. Said list went to the outside telemarketing company we dealt with.

Apparently this TM decided to ignore the designation and call me at home. Bad bad move. It was about 7PM and I had just gotten home from the store, gym and post work activities. I picked up the phone and heard "this is so-and-so selling (local paper) subscriptions." I was annoyed and informed the caller I was on the DNC list and Was.Not.Interested. The caller asked why and when said caller was informed I worked for the paper, the assclown called me a liar. That would be a fatal error on his part. I asked for his name (got a fake name) and supervisor, whereupon he hung up the phone. I noted the time and date of the call and took a walk to Operations the next day. See, the guy did not realize I DID work for the paper, I DID know OUR in house people well and I DID give the date, time and call info to the now pissed off rep. This information was conveyed to the outside company who made these calls and a TM likely lost their job. The TMs were paid based on results and this guy got a little excited about the possibility of pressuring a caller to buy a product.

Disclaimer: I am Not gloating but telling a cautionary tale: DO NOT let short term greed blind you to the long term problems of lying for a sale.