Telemarketer Fun

[PepperElf]

rofl.... that's funny and evil.

hmmm can you run it through a voice changer? make him sound like darth vader?

[SilverOrb]

Update:-

Scammer called today... So being the wonderfully polite, forgiving person I am...
I started crying on the phone and said the owner died. They then asked why I was crying. I said, "Don't you have a heart?! He is dead!" I then hung up and laughed hysterically with my manager.

He then called right back and asked if I was still crying. I laughed and hung up. Hahahaha

[PepperElf]

i guess he doesn't believe you.

i really do recommend the "annoying song" though. it got stuck in my head after sampling it... unfortunately i kinda like it when songs get stuck, so i'm listening to it again on purpose

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Answer all the caller's questions with "Dave's not here, man!" in your best stoner voice.

Put on an indistinguishable foreign accent and tell them "I solly, he/she ees nut here. Zees is his/her valet. He/she is in New Guinea. Will be gone 3 months! I go press pants now, bye bye!"

[bean]

Do bill collectors count?

We CONSTANTLY get bill collectors calling my store for various people - I'm in a store with nearly 300 employees, without a department I won't (even if I know who you're talking about) route your call.

"Bob Vasquez? Do you know which department he works in?" No. "Sorry, without knowing which department they're in I have no way of knowing where to transfer you." Can I speak to HR? "They've already left for the day". HR leaves around 3pm, sometimes 4pm, I don't come in until 2pm-3pm and they want NOTHING to do with bill collectors.

Though I did chuckle a little when a bill collector called for someone I absolutely despise who no longer works there.

I have a scammy bill collector after me too, when I pick up and say my name they automatically assume I'm the same Bob Smith they're looking for (okay, so I am). "Who? What department are they in? You don't know? Sorry, I'm a different <Bob>. No you may not have my last name. This is a place of business and I'm asking you to cease and desist all calls here. *click*".

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't bill collectors forbidden from calling people while they're at work?

[KellyHabersham]

I'm fairly certain that they're not forbidden to do that, but they DO have to cease contacting you at work if you ask them not to.

[Andara Bledin]

Bill collectors are not proscribed from calling a person's place of business, at least in the US.

However, they are forbidden to reveal that they are calling to collect on a debt, which is why they always say that it's personal business or something similar.

From what I understand, if they reveal to anyone other than the person who owes money that they are trying to collect on a debt, they have to eat it. This was started so that they wouldn't try to shame a person into paying by calling their bosses and asking about the money.

As for calling, they will keep doing it until either A) the business tells them never to call again (as the owner of the phone account, a business can do this), or B) the debt holder telling them they are not allowed to contact their place of employment. If the collector continues to do so after being forbidden, they can then be sued for harassment.

And if you tell them never to call again and they whine about not being able to get in touch with you, just tell them to try the post office. Last you checked, it was still legal to harass people via the USPS.

^-.-^

[protege]

I only mess with the scammers or the idiots who won't take "no" for an answer. Most of the time, a simple "Not interested, thanks" is enough to get rid of most telemarketers. Simple and to the point..they can then bother someone else

But, the scammers...I have *no* sympathy for. They deserve whatever you do to them. Especially the copier supply people. We already have a good deal with the local store, so don't bug us. I already know that you're trying to rip me off as soon as you ask for the machine's serial number. There's no reason to ask for it...unless you're a scammer.

I also don't enjoy being bugged to buy an extended warranty for my vehicle. Why? Well, it's a Toyota. They tend to go on forever But, every now and then...I'm tempted to ask if they'll cover a 1969 MGB GT, or a 1959 Radio-Flyer...just to throw them for a loop. Of course if I *really* wanted to screw with them, I'd ask about coverage for a Sunbeam Alpine, DKW 1000SP, or something really obscure, like a Tatra

[SilverOrb]

I've heard that the warranty thing is actually a scam... We keep getting calls for that on all my business lines... All 300 or so of them I imagine.

[draftermatt]

I'm fairly certain that they're not forbidden to do that, but they DO have to cease contacting you at work if you ask them not to.

But then they get all kinds of creative.

Like calling your sister's house (who's number is in her husband's name) or somehow getting your boyfriend's cell phone number and constantly calling it.

My sister in law had a collection agency calling her for a debt she paid. They were pissed when we told them she didn't & had never lived with us, and we had no way of contacting her.

[Mr Hero]

This happened about a year ago. For about a couple weeks I had been getting constant calls at my work informing me of potential management opportunities. I played it completely straight by expressing my interest and asked the caller if they had a pamphlet or something written I can have sent. After they told me they did not, I politely told the caller I am no longer interested.

I'm still not sure if it was legit or not, but after she found out she was calling a place of business, I stopped getting calls from there.

[Slytovhand]

"No man.. Dave's not here..." hehehe... I love that bit! Ah, the memories!

I suggest just transferring from phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to phone to


(gotta love copy and paste )

Or... sound uber excited, and try to sign up for everything you possibly can (with fake details), and then right at the end, when they want payment details, tell them "Oh, I'm sorry, but I've just been made bankrupt, and the liquidators have put a hold on all our assets - including the bank account".

[Lil Bunny]

I, quite unintentionally, have come up with a great way of dealing with them.

See where I work, it's me and the boss man. More times than not, I have a hard time locating boss man because he's always working on SOMETHING. And usually that something is outside. And of course that outside is the back 40. After putting them on hold, I have to make sure he's not in the building. After that I check that his truck is there. From here, I have to put on my hat/glasses and make the treck out side to the oils room or maintenance building. If still no boss man, I hike out to the balloon building and see what equip he's playing in the dirt with. From here, I have to flag him down, wait til he pulls up and THEN give him the message. If he decides to take it (or even not) then there's the hike back in.

Longest anyone held on? 15 minutes.

Yes we have radios, he just usually forgets or just can't hear his.

[JLRodgers]

I, almost never get telemarketer calls now, only times I do I'm trying to figure out how they managed to get my information (phone's not in my name, and I don't give it out unless required).

So I normally end up messing with them in a way that most don't think about: I try to get as much info from the person on the phone as possible, like their business's real name, real address they are at, etc. When they call, I immediately look up the number online, and start searching for everything they say, including weather in their area - then I ask about the weather, if they say "nice" I'd be like "but you're under a tornado warning!" or some such thing

But only if I have time, and I'm actually at the computer, with the phone in front of me, and the internet's moving really quick -- and they're talking slow enough I can multitask with typing and everything else, while still maintaining a conversation without letting them realize what's going on.

Most times I just say "not interested, and never will be" and hang up.


But one weird thing I've discovered: as soon as I start keeping track of telemarketers, bill collectors for people who aren't living here, etc here --- they stop calling!

Even ones that were told "he does not live here bill" up to 5 times a day (same person a few times) three weeks straight. Kept on calling, started writing down when/etc, stopped within three calls and I never said a thing about recording their call times.