How things are done at work: Official method vs Unofficial method

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

where i work the bailer is inside, not sure why anyone would want one outside where rain will soak the cardboard that's inside it and soack the pallet jack when you empty it.

Not to mention why go inside and try to sleep in the bailer in the backroom, when we have perfectly good futon displays on the salesfloor to crash on?

[Crosshair]

So hang on a second...

You are in the practise of climbing into a garbage compacter...AND you've broken the lock?

No offense, but im smelling a darwin award coming up here...

The compactor is completely locked out when we go in. We do everything we are supposed to "officialy" do except we don't move the trash container since the contractor takes at least 12-24 hours to come and move the container. Even if we move the trash container we still have to climb into the box to empty the trash.

As for the lock. If we don't leave the door unlocked, there gets to be a large pile of trash that takes one poor person a LOOOOONG time to get through since management is always busy when we need it open. On another note, they installed a much stronger hasp.

/No I was not the one who broke the hasp, I don't even know who did.

[Drakstern]

The bathrooms need to be cleaned.

OP - Wait until it's slow, then get one of the baggers to clean it.
NM - Wait until it's sorta slow, then get the cashier that does a really good job a lot faster than the baggers and doesn't complain half as much to do it.

Till needs a pick up

OP - Get a manager or the cop on security to walk out with you when you go to pick up the cash.
NM - Just do it yourself.

There's a lot of carts on the lot

OP - Tell the manager so he can get people on it.
NM - Tell the manager, so he can ignore it until you get someone to do it instead.

Customer threatens to go to Krogers

OP - Be understanding and try to take into account their complaints while working with them to adress them. Be sympathetic and helpful.
NM - "Door's to your left."

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Till needs a pick up

OP - Get a manager or the cop on security to walk out with you when you go to pick up the cash.
NM - Just do it yourself.

That's a good way to get robbed. At my store, whenever the tills need to be collected from Lawn and Garden, somebody always has to accompany the person picking up the till. Unless you're talking about picking up a till within the store.

And now, one last one from me:

Situation: You're on third shift and you need to contact one of your coworkers
Official method: Page the coworker
Unofficila Method: aka the Pee Wee Herman Method: Scream real loud! This is because you can't page anybody because the PA is being used to play music other than the Christmas dreck that gets piped in via satellite

[Drakstern]

That's a good way to get robbed. At my store, whenever the tills need to be collected from Lawn and Garden, somebody always has to accompany the person picking up the till. Unless you're talking about picking up a till within the store.

They're all in store and, aside from the deli till, very close to the cash office.

Deli till's the only one we would get an escort for, and that's because it's right by the entrances.

More from me.

Unloading trucks
OP: Don't overload the belt rollers, as merchandise could slide off.
NM: Throw as much on as possible and complain about how slow everyone else is going if they can't keep up.


Cashier needs an override
OP: Cashier walks to service desk, asks for override. Later, turns on blinky light thing.
NM: Cashier yells that they need an override.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Unloading trucks
OP: Don't overload the belt rollers, as merchandise could slide off.
NM: Throw as much on as possible and complain about how slow everyone else is going if they can't keep up.

You sure you don't work at my store? Because that is how we do our trucks too.

We even have a slogan: "We don't slow down. You speed up."

[Gurndigarn]

I will give you the Chuck E Cheese version.

Box of brass tokens needed from the top shelf of a 10-15 foot high supply shelving unit.

Official Method: Grab a full sized ladder and prop against the top shelf, making sure that

They put tokens in unsecured locations? How do they prevent employee theft? And why put them up high, unless it's to prevent theft/create humorous moments?

[Crosshair]

You sure you don't work at my store? Because that is how we do our trucks too.

We even have a slogan: "We don't slow down. You speed up."

At our store, one of the unloaders, who was throwing the truck, came up with the following:

Me: Hey R, the boxes are falling off the line, you're pushing them too fast.
R: No I'm not, they're commiting suicide. You need to do a better job of stoping them.

So now instead of saying, "Boxes are falling off the line". We say, "Got another suicide." or "Got another jumper."

/Yes I do alot of different things in the store, throwing freight is one of them.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Okay, sorry to commit thread necrophilia here, but this really pissed me off.

Situation: You have taken down a planogram and you have a bunch of fixtures (peghooks, pegboard clips and plastic peghook clips) that you're not using anymore.

Official method: Separate all the fixtures (peghooks go in one pile, pegboard clips go in another, plastic peghook clips go in their own pile), the put all the fixtures into the correct bin in the fixture room.

Unofficial method: Toss all the fixtures into a shopping cart in a jumbled mess. Push shopping cart into a hidden corner of the backroom and leave it there. If cart is discovered and you are asked to put your fixtures away, push the cart into another corner of the backroom and abandon it. Repeat until you have run out of hiding places. Then, toss all the fixtures into a bin without separating them or taking everything apart.

GAH! Cleaning out the fixture room is about as enjoyable as a swift kick to the floppy bits, thanks to my inconsiderate cow-irkers. IMHO, those souls who get condemned to the 9th circle of Hell should have to spend eternity cleaning up an infinite fixture room where everything is just tossed into a pile.

[Tanasi]

When a monitor finally goes bad:
OM: After several are collected haul them to a official disposal facility.
AM: Save them for office olympics. Toss for distance using the shotputt method. Toss for distance using the hammer method.

When removing obsolete equipment from customer site:
OM: Bring all equipment to office for proper disposal.
AM: Load it up in the van and then dump it in their neighbors dumpster. I have actually filled the hotel GM's truck bed full of said equipment.

Customer's software license is due to expire:
OM: Contact customer 30 in advance and remind them and again at 15 days. At a week have boss contact customer to hard sell them.
AM: If they're a good customer (a profitiable customer), nice folks, or loacted in a good vacation area remind them and offer a discount. (Later remind them of the discount when you're looking for rooms in that area.) If they call a lot with stupid questions, complain a lot about things you can't change, cost you money, are nasty, you have to deal with too many of their stupid employees not only do not offer a discount increase the renewal and don't bother the boss.

If a customer doesn't renew:
OM: Give them a 30 extension but change support to pre-pay, after thirty days disable software.
AM: If good customer give extension, pre-pay, but do not disable software. If bad customer delete software and when they call tell them they will have to pay for an update maybe a software/hardware refresh (can you say expensive).

Company president has a computer problem:
OM: Treat him no different from anyone else.
AM: He goes to the top of the list for the most experienced techs (his name is at the bottom of the check.)

[Dave1982]

Sorry to kick this thread up, but this has been driving me crazy since I was transferred to electronics.

Situation: A shredder/printer/scanner/fax machine needs to be restocked.

Official Procedure

1. Locate RF Gun. Start Directed Pull List

2. Scan shelf tag for shredder/printer/whatever. Enter quantity to pull.

3. Get stopped by a customer. Help them.

4. Scan all other low/out items in department.

5. Help at least 3 more customers while completing step 4.

6. Submit Pull List.

7. Help another customer.

8. Retrieve Pull List from printer. Begin researching Zero-on-Hand items.

9. Get interrupted by a customer askign if you can ring them out.

10. Put out of stock tags where needed.

11. Help another customer.

12. Locate ladder; bring ladder to overhead storage rack where shredder/printer/whatever is stored.

13. Help at least two customers in Office Supplies and/or Furniture, since those department clerks are nowhere to be found.

14. Park ladder. Set brake.

15. Begin to ascend ladder, only to be interrupted by another customer.

16. Pull down item.

17. Bring item to the shelf, being interrupted by at least one custoemr who can't tell that the item you are carrying weighs a million pounds.

18. Spend the next 2 hours completing the Pull List, being interrupted no less than 8 times in the process.


Unofficial Procedure:

1. Make sure the MOD is not around.

2. Screw the Pull List. Just get the ladder and get the item you need. If a customer interrupts, lie to them and say you are busy with another customer and that you will be with them shortly.

3. Page another assocaite to help those customers.

4. Do the full Pull List later (bonus points if you can put it off until the end of your shift, so someone else has to do it )

Yes, I know the customers never interrupt your work; they ARE your work, but sometimes things just don't get done otherwise. And if you don't restock that item, you cna be sure that someone will ask for it in short order.