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"You're not stupid . . . you're just special."
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Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)
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Female Coworker excitedly: "Nevermind, 'K' (male coworker) helped me get it up!"
Me: OMG!Make a list of important things to do today.
At the top of your list, put 'eat chocolate'
Now, you'll get at least one thing done todayComment
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"Eeee, eee, eeee! I'm talking to the pen in Guinea pig!"
RapscallionComment
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"Alvin and the Chipmunks is a dirty, dirty film!""I can tell her you're all tied up in the projection room." Sunset Boulevard.Comment
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Rockers don't wear snow boots."Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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"As God as my witness, I will never fib about frozen water.""For the love of all that is holy and 4 things that aren’t but feel pretty good anyway" ~ GravekeeperComment
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c1: Oh good, you're here. I need you to *snaps fingers to try to jog memory* I need you to *more snapping fingers* Show me .... *snapping fingers haven't broken yet.*
c2: To show that you care.
Tech: Sorry, fresh out. Try again tomorrow.Comment
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"Hey! That cow has a hole in it!!""Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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Me: "Hey, J, we're talking about death up here!"
A: "Were you calling for me?""Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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"Cecelia was a whore. But for some reason, Simon was really into her.""Who loves not women, wine, and song remains a fool his whole life long" ~Martin Luther
"Always send a lazy man to the angel of death" ~Martin Luther
My MySpace
My LiveJournalComment
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I can drive to Portland in my rocket car in just 10 minutes!Your neck is 7 and a half feet wide and 4 and a half feet tall. Your shoulders are also around 4 and a half feet wide. Your butt is 4 feet wide and your arms are around 3 feet long-gravekeeperComment
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"Anything's better than the image of Curt in a mesh tank top.""Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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"I need two large things of Cat Crap"Comment
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"They ought to have a show like The Biggest Loser, but instead of fat people, they should have real losers on it. 'You're ugly, you have no friends, and you smell like cabbage. People run away from you as you walk down the street. You are the Biggest Loser.'"Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost dailyComment
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"P.S. Don't open the hot-tub this morning, seems an elephant broke in and took a bath..."Comment
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