Workday Phrases of Lore and Legend

[Princess-Snake]

"and then when I went to put my shoes on, there were weasels inside them!"

[cinema guy]

"We will be showing The Assassination of Brad Pitt."

[edible_hat]

"It's Mr Potter. I can't remember his first name."
"Harry?"
"No but I've heard that name before. Where do I know a Harry Potter from... the footy club? No. Umm...."

[Xieg]

"... So now the cat has herpes"

"We have no water pressure."
"Great, now we can switch to hard liquor."

[edible_hat]

"There seems to be a cricket in that fridge."


"Fifteen hundred? That's not a real time!"

[Rapscallion]

"Bob the ninja, can he kill them? Bob the ninja, yes he can!"

Rapscallion

[Spiffy McMoron]

"Someone put Texas Longhorns on the hood of a Hummer? Who does he think he is, Boss fucking Hogg?"
"I think the girls would love them."
"Oh, yeah. I can hear panties falling in a 100-mile radius!"
"Well, you go to a beach, and if you drive right, you can pull off their bikinis with them."
"Yeah...nothing impresses girls like almost getting run over AND stabbed in the chest."

[edible_hat]

"Golden vagina. I can't wait to try that one."

[Princess-Snake]

What do you mean I'm drinking Velociraptor pee?!

[edible_hat]

"What are you doing?"
"Practicing with imaginary nunchuks."
"Ok, carry on. Make sure the would-be robbers see you."

[Boochan]

"I got invited to a lube party this saturday night"

[technical.angel]

"Well, if I was a guy, I'd enjoy having scantily clad women dancing on my table."
"Or a lesbian."

[Rapscallion]

"Pen attack of Doom!"

Rapscallion

[Boochan]

"Fear my hammer of management"

[edible_hat]

"She stuck her finger in the electric socket. Or maybe hung upside down while someone put gel in her hair. Seriously, it was standing on end."

"What if somebody attacks you like this? Ow! Quit it! That hurts!"

"He stomped hard and a knife came out."