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"So, that Laser printer thats full of carconogenic toner? can I blast the black and coloured dust out of it with the air compressor?"
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-The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-
Stick that in your blog and smoke it.
A guide for customers about retail -
"Don't stack it any higher than my boobies."Comment
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"You suck!"
"Not anymore I don't!"I'm bringing disdain back...with a vengeance.
Oh, and your tool box called...you got out again.Comment
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"If I look up 'Chav' in the dictionary, I'll see your picture.""I can tell her you're all tied up in the projection room." Sunset Boulevard.Comment
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(Note: All voices are all male.)
R: (mock flirting) Hey, cupcake!
Me: Hey, cinnamon raisin bagel with cream cheese!
(Later)
R: (mock flirting) Hey, pumpkin!
Me: Hey, butternut squash!
T: Will you two fruits knock that off?!
R: Pumpkins are fruits?
T: Actually, I think they're legumes.
Me: T thinks I'm a legume!I suspect that... inside every adult (sometimes not very far inside) is a bratty kid who wants everything his own way.
- Bill Watterson
My co-workers: They're there when they need me.
- IPFComment
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"It's pinker than you think."Comment
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"In Brazil they do it a hundred percent."Comment
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"You picked a good night to be here! It's underwear swap night.""Man, having a conversation with you is like walking through a salvador dali painting." - Mac HallComment
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"I thought 21 inches was average"
"No, its actually small. Both my sons were 21 inches."Comment
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where's my bitch?
*gregg walks in*
aaah! there he is!
-The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-
Stick that in your blog and smoke it.
A guide for customers about retailComment
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"The profit sharing statements are in"
"Am I 100% vested yet? Sweet, I am, now I can quit"Comment
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k: she's got one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel.Kim: She's got one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel.
I'd like to exercise my constitutional right to not give a fuck.Comment
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"Wrapped around a toilet... I can think of better ways to spend your wedding night."
"Oh oh! Can I do it? I'll get to write my new name!"
*signs name*
"Ah crap, that's the old one."Comment
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"So, does your dog wear contact lenses or something then?"Comment
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"You know, in ancient Sparta, they used to throw disabled babies off a cliff."
"Really? I wonder what the babies were thinking of as they fell."I pray for the strength to change what I can, the inability to change what I can't, and the incapacity to tell the difference -Calvin, Calvin & Hobbes
Being a pessimist and cynical wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't right so often!
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