Please Refrain From Peeing in Our Chairs. Thank You.

[B&NGoddess]

we have a regular called "pee lady". she's older, maybe 60s-ish. we first started calling her pee lady because, well, she smelled like urine. not too much of a departure in aroma from most of our other clientele, so we didn't think too much of it. aside from smelling like a portopotty, she likes to leave her unwanted junkmail in our entryway. coupon books, catalogs, etc.

within the past few months, however, she's gone from being a nuisance to willful destruction.

first incident: peed on the cafe floor.

second incident: peed in a chair. then told if it happened again, she would no longer be welcome back to the store.

third: peed in a chair, but left before anyone could catch her.

fourth: peed in a chair, flipped the cushion to hide it and then left.

none of the managers knows what to do. suggestions? comments? concerns?
seriously, we're running out of chairs.

[Banrion]

Well, if she is leaving her junk mail in your entry, you must have her address...







Ban her from the store anyway. Next time she tries to come in tell her in no uncertain terms that she's not welcome there.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

none of the managers knows what to do. suggestions? comments? concerns?
seriously, we're running out of chairs.

Does that mean you have to get rid of the chair when she tinkles in it?

I'd suggest seeing if you can ban her from the store. The money she's costing the company in cleaning bills and replacememnt chairs probably outweighs whatever she spends when she visits.

Or maybe tape signs to every chair reading "The bathroom is to your (right, left, behind you, wherever the bathroom is)"

[AirHostess]

Ban her. Who gets to clean the chairs?

[wagegoth]

File a police report. It might fall under willful destruction of property.

Even if it doesn't, the police may need to drop her off for a psychological evaluation.

[CanadaGirl]

It could be that the woman has some condition where she doesn't feel the urge to urinate, and therefore she "goes" wherever.

[wagegoth]

It could be that the woman has some condition where she doesn't feel the urge to urinate, and therefore she "goes" wherever.

Possibly, but that's what Depends are for.

A lot of misplaced rage and frustration seems to be the cause of people urinating/defecating in stores.

[Misanthropical]

The only time I ever came near peeing in the lobby of a store is when I was obviously pregnant and they refused to let me use their bathroom.

If you have ever been pregnant you know that when you have to go you have to go NOW.

I managed somehow to get to the store next door, but the business that refused to let me use their bathroom lost our business forever.

[Myra]

Dude! This has happened to me TWICE! First time it was an old man. His adult kids bought phones from me, and he just sat, quietly, patiently waiting for his kids to be done. Once they left, I discovered the offending chair.

Second time was a kid, maybe six-years old, who kept telling his mom that he had to go potty. She kept telling him to wait. He peed on my chair. Way to be, lady.

Both times I had to shampoo the chair. What a joy. I told my husband, "I thought that when I quit the nursing home I'd be done cleaning up human pee." Guess not.

[Luna]

Throw her out and tell her she is no longer wlecome in the store. Pissing once may have been an accident. Twice gets you banned if I were still Queen of the book world.


Warning: GROSS

The B&N I worked at opened in 1998. When those beautiful chairs came in on the pallets - I cut them open from the shrinkwrap and sat in them for my break. When the SM asked why I was so anxious to be the first to sit in them I told him it was b/c I would never ever sit in them again once we opened for business.

And no, the chairs don't get thrown out. At least the ones in the store I used to work at stayed for over 5 years before they were. Corporate tells you to wipe it down and spray it with Febreeze. Let it dry. They won't even cover the costs of laundering the cushions. At least not in the 5 years I was there. So all the times people peed and crapped on the chairs, threw up or drooled or Gods know what else...it's all absorbed into the cushions. Maybe twice a year the people that did the rug cleaning would do a quick shampoo of the outside of the cushions. Maybe.

Yummy. And to remember all the customers that would FIGHT over who got to sit in the stupid chairs. I can't even begin to count how many arguements and almost physical altercations between customers I had to break up - all fighting to sit in these piss/shit filled chairs.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Just a wipe down and Febreeze? That's not very sanitary. I kinda doubt Febreeze is going to kill all the nasty germs that reside in the residue of the pee/poop/puke.

At least now I know not to sit in any of the chairs at Barnes & Noble...or any other bookstore.

[Mark Healey]

Once when I was walking past the store where I work I noticed the doorway blocked with chairs and signs stating it was closed. I looked in and saw the boss operating a grocery store rug cleaner. I asked him what happened and he told me:

A woman came in in a wheelchair with hospital markings on it and left a trail of poop blobs throughout the store. It turns out that she is crazy. She stole a wheelchairs from one of the hospitals in the area, sat down and didn't get up for anything - I mean anything. The poo piled up in her pants until it started oozing over the waistband.

The government mental health people (whatever the agency is called) caught her cleaned her up and let her go. Within a week or two the poo was overflowing again. Lather, rinse, repeat a few times and they were finally able to get her commited.

We never knew her name. We just called her Shit Lady.

[Kiwi]

An older lady wet herself twice in the gift store I worked at, twice.

Both times right infront of the counter (the only one in the store) she was lonely and would lurk in our store ALL day, not bothering anyone until she knew we were getting ready to close...

then she would stand up at the counter trying to talk to us, keeping us as long as possible and when she was finally asked to buy something or leave... she would leave.... her mark.

She was banned after the second time. Never saw her again.... I didnt have to clean it up thank god. So gross to see that... one of those surreal moments.

[ArenaBoy]

A few weeks ago when some coworkers and I were picking up the lot, we found a bottle of pee on the ground. Right away we donned some gloves, emptied it out into a rock pile, and threw it into a garbage bag. On a side note, I am never sitting in those chairs again at B&N, Borders, or any other chain or independent store. These stories, especially Mark's make me sick.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Well, once a kid peed on the floor of the supermarket, but his mum was brilliant. She insisted on cleaning it up, and told said kid he definitely wasn't getting any pudding. Maybe threatening Pee Lady with no pudding would do the trick? XD