Things we would like customers to know - please feel free to add

[NateTheChops]

Boy, oh, boy. Where do I start. Ten years of working in various jobs have given me a list longer than my... well it's pretty long.

From my Cart Attendant Days both in 2003 and 2012 and any of the years in between when shopping carts were relevant to my job.

* Stop whipping the damn shopping carts at me. It's a big parking lot. It's busy. Any number of things could be going on at the moment, not the least of which is me not being able to catch your cart in time to keep it from hitting someone else's vehicle.

* I work for *X* and I'm not responsible for carts from *Y*. Also, please stop bringing in carts from every store in the plaza or mall that has a cart.

* You don't need to do my job for me. When you jam certain shopping carts together it leads to the comically tragic act of having two or more carts stuck together and you complaining that you can't get them unstuck when you return for your billionth shopping trip that week.

* No I do not work here everyday. Although it must seem as though I do to someone who makes their living on government assistance and has nothing better to do than eat at the instore resturaunt.

As a Janitor/Ground Crew Detailer

* I might have been able to change the toilet paper quicker if I didn't have to keep leaving the ladies room to allow people to use it. I know you just got out of church and you can't wait to try on the latest cashmier sweaters at discount prices, but I am not Rosie from the Jetsons. Either pee at church, go to the grocery store next door, or find some bushes out back. Best case scenario you'll get a fine, worse case you'll wind up on Youtube.

Either way it allows me to do my job in providing you with a throne worthy of the Virgin Mary, at least until lunch.

* I work for a subcontractor, but the company logo on my reflective vest clearly says Airline A. Why would I know when Airline B is arriving or what the status of your luggage is if you were from an Airline B flight? Their gate isn't even in the same half of the tarmac as ours.

On all Cashier Positions

* Yes I may be new. But just because another employee broke company policy does not mean I am required to break it for you, so bullying me into doing it by constantly asking me if I'm new at this job isn't going to fly. And yes, just because my manager allowed you to do it doesn't mean you should keep needling me for being "new".

* No, I will not break the law for you no matter how many times you stamp your feet and howl.

* You're being in a hurry is not my problem. Yes, I will ring you out as quickly as I am able, but I will ask you all of the questions I am required to ask you in the course of this transaction and I will follow all of the procedures required of me when the situation calls for them. It's not my fault you chose to stop here on a busy day, or that you put off shopping for your loved ones until you were on the way to their birthday/wedding/execution.

* Don't come into my line wearing a uniform from your store/place of employment and start giving me a hard time. I will return the favor.

* I appreciate compliments. But the person who needs to hear them is my manager or supervisor as they then have the burdon of remembering such information when it comes to time to evaluate my performance. Failing that, we have an 800 number or a website you could go to and give me kudos on.

* Please note that every store is different. There are some places where I can cut corners and others where I am being watched very closely. If there is something you need me to do I have a process I have to follow to get it done but it is not because I don't wish to help you.

* I am not responsible for every single offense, real or imagined, that has been done to you because of my company. I am a low level employee just trying to pay the rent.

[EricKei]

Have your house number on display; don't hide it behind shrubs, hanging baskets or trees.

Make sure your house number can be seen from the road, lighting may help

Oh lawd THIS! It was a major pet peeve when I was slinging pizzas. I could swear that some houses lacked a number *entirely*, save for perhaps on their mailbox, which was, of course, not visible from the street.

The only thing worse was the areas where there were no street lights at all (except maybe on the corner) and perhaps one house on the entire street had the outside light on -- and it was almost never the person who had ordered pizza. The pizza dude shouldn't be forced to buy a pricey halogen searchlight just to read yer damn address at night! Of course, these people tend to be the ones that complain that their food is always "late" -- through no fault of their own, of course -- no matter where they order from. Oddly enough, the tendency for an area to be this way is much MORE likely in the neighborhoods where the landscaping costs more than most other people's cars >_>

And one more thing -- Learn how to plan ahead. If you need to leave in exactly 45 minutes to make it to the opera on time, and the pizza place says that orders are taking 45 minutes to deliver right now, DON'T PLACE THE ORDER! I had this happen to me once -- We quoted 45m to an hour, I got there in exactly 45 mins (timed it) despite the fact that they were at the ass end of our delivery area and the ONLY way to get there required sitting in rush hour traffic for 20 minutes. They grabbed the pizzas from me and literally threw them onto the front table and then finished piling into their cars, complaining all the time that the food would be wasted because they would not have time to eat it. I don't recall if they paid or not >_<

[Kristev]

What a waste of pizza. And people, for that matter.

[KellyHabersham]

Books are NOT shelved backwards - when you're putting one back on the shelf, please make sure the spine is facing you.

And to certain parents (and kids who are old enough to know better) - please stop tearing up certain sections of the children's room. It is a wee bit tiresome having to straighten the dinosaur books, graphic novels,.....etc., multiple times a day.

[tropicsgoddess]

If you need directions to the hotel, call the hotel or USE A FUCKING MAP! Google Maps, Tom Tom or even the old fashioned maps! FFS!

You still need to be specific on where and when you wanna go and how many people you're taking with you on the trip! I can't just pull rates outta my ass!

[Josh]

'open to the public' is not fancy rewording of 'public space'.

you DON'T really pay our salaries.

sales clerks are not your temporary indentured servants.

[wolfie]

Oh lawd THIS! It was a major pet peeve when I was slinging pizzas. I could swear that some houses lacked a number *entirely*, save for perhaps on their mailbox, which was, of course, not visible from the street.

The only thing worse was the areas where there were no street lights at all (except maybe on the corner) and perhaps one house on the entire street had the outside light on -- and it was almost never the person who had ordered pizza. The pizza dude shouldn't be forced to buy a pricey halogen searchlight just to read yer damn address at night!

I wonder if these people realize that the worst that can happen if the pizza guy can't see your address is that you'll get your dinner late, if the AMBULANCE driver can't see your address Uncle Joe who had a heart attack/Junior who fell while climbing a tree could DIE.

Books are NOT shelved backwards - when you're putting one back on the shelf, please make sure the spine is facing you.

I recall reading a Wikipedia article about chained books (anti-theft measure when they were copied by hand and therefore extremely valuable), and they were shelved with the spine to the back in order to accommodate the chain.

[MoonCat]

-Being on hold for ten minutes is not that big a deal. This is advertising, not 9-1-1. When I started in this job 30-some years ago, people waited sometimes 20-30 minutes or longer on busy days, and they bitched less about it!
-Yes, it would be nice to have more people on staff. Guess what? Not gonna happen. So suck it up and wait. You'll get the same service either way (god knows how, but I somehow manage to sound cheerful and happy to help even when I want to strangle the idiot callers).
-Calling and getting our recording/hold system does not mean "you couldn't get through." You got through - that's why you're on hold. Hanging up 20 times and dialing again will only put you farther back in the qeue. Deal with it.
-It's not my fault you didn't listen to the recording that told you the number to call for that other dept. and now you have to be transferred. Pay attention!

[NoMoreRetail]

Same could be said for customer service calls. More than likely you are not the only person trying to call customer service. If it is that important (which usually it isn't) just shut up and wait for the next available CSR. Calling the store itself to complain about being on hold for 10 mins. is not going to get you anywhere!

[MoonCat]

Yeah, I always loved when they would call advertising and say, "Can you put me through to circulation? I was on hold for ten minutes waiting for them!" And I'd have to tell them that all I do is dial an extension that puts me through to the same hold system. I do not have a magic number they can call where they never have to wait.

[Bella_Vixen]

I've been bagging groceries since I was 9 years old. Trust me when I only put a certain amount of items in a cheap plastic/crappy paper bag with semi glued on handles.

I recall reading a Wikipedia article about chained books (anti-theft measure when they were copied by hand and therefore extremely valuable), and they were shelved with the spine to the back in order to accommodate the chain.

Doesn't that damage the books?

[crazylegs]

Doesn't that damage the books?

Not hugely - it was when books were only read/used by the exceptionally rich so they didn't get used much.

More info here http://www.herefordcathedral.org/vis...hained-library (this isn't too far from where I live, I really should visit it at some point).

[XCashier]

More info here http://www.herefordcathedral.org/vis...hained-library (this isn't too far from where I live, I really should visit it at some point).

Ooh, yes you should! I'd visit if I were in the area! If I ever get to the UK, I would tour castles and cathedrals and museums galore . Expensive, yes, but so worth it. (I love medieval history!)

[MoonCat]

Speaking of driving (which I do not do)...

If you don't know how to get to our building from wherever the F you are, LOOK IT UP. Don't call from your car somewhere out on the thruway and ask me which exit you need to get off at. I don't drive, so I don't know. That's why they make maps, GPS, and this neat little thing called the internet.

[Android Kaeli]

-- The things in your buggy must be put into another buggy. Not only because the shit job you did packing prevents me from properly putting the rest of the stuff on the belt in the buggy, but also because I like getting paid.

-- The water that's in your buggy? That's not heavy. Try unloading a U-Boat of frames, ONE of those boxes is HEAVIER then your fucking water.

-- Yes it's busy, it's Memorial Day weekend so what did you expect?

-- Don't whistle to get a supervisor over. You'll only make her help the four other cashiers first and she will take her sweet time getting over to me [ of which I don't blame her the slightest ].

-- As a ending and post-script for the above point, just because you have tax exempt status doesn't mean it applies to beer and other such drinks. If you don't like it, don't buy it.