Stuff you've learned the hard way

[Mytical]

That a lot of people do not realize how amazing they are. How much they mean to others, how much they contribute, and how smart they actually are. The ones who boast the most about all of this..usually are the ones it does not apply to.

Loyalty rarely is valued, but you don't have to do everything just because it gets recognized.

Treat others as good, or better, then you want to be treated..just don't be surprised when others do not return the favor.

Some people just like to rant, and do not want advice. Which is perfectly fine.

Some people like to give advice, even in areas they know nothing about.

People will let you down..even if your expectations are low...however..some people will far exceed your expectations.

[raudf]

Management rarely knows your job. If they do know your job, they often don't know how to do it.

Management's idea of training is to just assign a co-worker for you to shadow. Don't complain, because at least the co-worker likely knows what they are doing.

Customers complain. A lot. Don't take it personal, even when they do blame you for the broken VCR with the jammed porn tape in it. It is well worth it when the customer comes in to pick up said VCR and said tape.

Customers will ask for you to marry them. Apparently, scheduling a call is equal to cleaning the kitchen, while ordering a part is equal to fixing them a sandwich.

[eltf177]

It isn't being good at what you do for a living that gets you anywhere, it's being able to BS and brown nose. The ones that laugh and joke with the managers get promotions & raises, while those guietly doing the real work get nothing.

You have just described my workplace perfectly...

That bailing people out of the fire means they come to expect being bailed out rather than learning to not walk into the fire to begin with.

I learned this one the hard way more than once. My new mantra is "I will help you with that", NOT "I will do that for you." And you'd better be grateful and appreciative if you want my help again in the future...

[Skeen]

Find at least one thing you do better than everyone else, and make sure you do it flawlessly.

If your boss slams shut her door, then tells you it's ok for YOU to come in if you need something, don't go in anyway. She's just hoping you'll come in so she can bitch at you in private.

Your boss really is just that much of a bitch. Don't take it personally, she hates everyone equally.

[Becks]

If it makes sense, it's not allowed. ™©

[dalesys]

If it makes sense, it's not allowed. ™©

You forgot ® and lost all protection.

[Racket_Man]

Motivation by pizza does not work

Pats on the head like you are a happy puppy does not work

Management pets DO sometimes have Karma bite them in the ass

Work smarter not harder is a crock

[drunkenwildmage]

Never Date a co-worker

Senior Management will go to a sales presentation for a system they are looking at buying, fall for the flashing, blinking lights that cost extra. Only buy the basic product, and then hand it over to you, and tell you 'make lights go blinky blinky'", and then not give you any budget to work with.

The more something makes sense, the less likely it will get approved in the budget.

The people that give a crap won't get promoted, and the people that don't give a crap, will get promoted until they do.

[Redbeard]

When looking back on my first marriage - Love is not only blind, it is also STUPID

[Solacelawlz]

- First would be that my supervisor is into cosplay!!! Found 5 pics of her on our secure network. not sure wtf they were doing there but yea....

- How secure everything was... I believe there's a security procedure for how to wipe your butt!

- How horrible our IT department is.... there are some great ones but majority and by majority I mean 90%ish are straight hot garbage!!

- That plugging in usb drives is bad bad and bad here!!!! It's a quick way to have the "men in black" (as they call them here) run to your area with weapons of mass destruction, strip search you, torture you, then happily escort you off the premises where you disappear!! ...ok maybe a little exaggerated but still bad and evil.

- That I'd be surrounded by old people, they are pretty cool old people but older people non the less. I'm junior by about 20 something odd yrs so yea....

- Last would be that dating a coworkers niece and/or daughter.... not always the best of ideas -_-

[Ghel]

-Never offer to help someone when they are obviously having trouble. They will view it as you thinking they can't do their job and you can do it better. Even if they accept your help, they will be resentful. If they ask for help first, then it's ok.

-Don't show skill in troubleshooting computer or phone issues if that's not part of your job description. You will be pulled away from your regular tasks to fix paper jams, reboot computers, and set voicemail messages with unsettling frequency.

-As someone mentioned upthread, don't listen when someone tells you to "use your own judgment." Your judgment will be wrong, and you will be blamed for it.

[raudf]

This one is from the hubby:

Just as you learn the programs needed for your job, they will be change and rendered less functional.

When told you can request programs that help you with your job, management will promptly pick the one you told them NOT to, and then whine when it takes the system down for three hours every day.

[Bandit]

Given two clearly labeled plugs - one for voice with a picture of a telephone and one for data with a picture of a computer, there's an 80+% chance a user will connect things wrong.

If there's an easy way to do the job and a hideously complex way to do the same job, management will always make the complex way policy.

If there's a way to add more paperwork/meetings/unproductive shit to a process, it'll always be added.

B

[MoonCat]

Management will always spend more time on things like complex instructions for calling in sick, creating promotions based on something only a very small percentage of your customers are interested in, or looking for ways to drop the hammer on you (tardiness, etc.). However, letting them know that something's not working right on the computer you depend on to do your job will get a response of, "Huh. Really?" and then be ignored.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

LP would much rather park their butts in the LP office and snoop on employees, than pay attention to the thieves stealing thousands of dollars in jewelry in one go.