Your Baby is Abnormal

[Gizmo]

(This was re 'you're too fat' from doctors)

Gizmo, that's just disgusting. If they honestly believe excess adipose tissue is your problem, they should be giving you dietician/nutritionist access, and access to a physiotherapist or other exercise specialist.

I agree. Unfortunately being the NHS its been this way for decades. It shouldn't be but some doctors use it as an excuse to basically say "this isn't my problem, people can lose weight on their own, these things could (in maybe 40% of cases or less) be purely weight based" and writing off difficult symptoms (such as sleep apnea, muscle/bone aches, backaches etc in my case. Its even worse since I shouldn't eat dairy - makes me feel like i have a bad cold - and there is circumstantial evidence of possible bone issues in my family).

I have other friends who have the same thing and have given up completely on trying to get things sorted. It tends to make it more stressful trying to get the symptoms investigated than just work around the problems. One has just found out that a low salt diet was actually causing problems so trying to eat healthy to lose weight has contributed to her problems.

/will get off soap box now.

[LadyAndreca]

I fell face-first onto the pointy end of my grandparents' cat when I was a toddler. My fault. I was supposed to be napping, but I was leaning waaaay over the bed so I could juuuust reach the inviting kitty belly and gravity took over. Poor Piano had a battery of tests and both my parents and grandparents had to argue HARD for him not to be put down afterwards because he was just defending himself from the dumb kid. I was screaming so bad from fear of my parents and grandparents' unholy wrath for not taking my nap like I was supposed to (as I remember it, this was the biggie), and pain from lacerated face, that they just stitched me up without numbing me because I was already screaming. I came out of it with just a tiny scar near my eye--it balanced out the pockmark on the other side from when I had chicken pox so very few people have ever noticed either.

It generally takes me two shots of novocane at the dentist, though I was gassed under for my wisdom teeth extraction. One of my brothers just had three for a root canal, then the dentist refused to give him any more and sent him home to make an appointment with a specialist.

[Sapphire Silk]

When I was little, about two I think, I ran into the coffee table in the living room and had to be rushed to the hospital to get stitches above my right eye. It was terrible- I still remember having to be strapped down (they didn't give me anesthesia and I don't remember why) and screaming for my dad.

My mom told me that she was standing in the waiting room when she heard on of the doctors talking to someone else about me and said "Geez, what a brat, she won't stop screaming."

NO SHIT SHERLOCK!! My mom almost punched him in the face.

As well she should. Asshole.

I've had doctors try and refuse to numb a laceration before sewing it on kids, saying, "they'll feel pain anyway." Yes, yes they will. But they'll also be holding still while you're trying to sew them back together, and that means it will hurt a lot less you dumbass!

There are a lot of tricks for numbing a kid. An ice pack to the area helps, then you can squirt a bit of lidocaine onto the wound, it'll get numb, and then you can inject it directly. Hurts a lot less. Shielding the needle from the kids gaze (but NOT blindfolding him) helps.

Another tactic is something called TAC or LET. TAC is Tetracaine, adrenaline and Cocaine and LET is Lidocaine Epinepherine and tetracaine. You pour this solution into a cotton ball and pack the wound, cover with gauze and tape for about 15 minutes. Numbs it up enough to sew in most cases, or at least numb more with an injection of lidocaine.

Finally . . . don't tie the kid down! Kids hate to be tied down . . . it scares them. Even toddlers often can understand that doctors and nurses are trying to help them if you take time to explain what you are going to do in language they can understand, then give them permission to be scared and to cry if they feel pain. Make them and the parents part of the team . . . it works so much better.

[Dragon_Dreamer]

They probably thought you had a concussion. Sedating you if you had one would be Bad[tm], iirc.

[Seshat]

Two years old. In pain. Being stitched up without anaesthetic.

Yeah, I'd say screaming is normal.

[Trjgul]

When I was little, about two I think, I ran into the coffee table in the living room and had to be rushed to the hospital to get stitches above my right eye. It was terrible- I still remember having to be strapped down (they didn't give me anesthesia and I don't remember why) and screaming for my dad.

My mom told me that she was standing in the waiting room when she heard on of the doctors talking to someone else about me and said "Geez, what a brat, she won't stop screaming."

NO SHIT SHERLOCK!! My mom almost punched him in the face.

[Little Retail Rabbit]

Mine ran away screaming into the windy, rainy day.

Wait, I think the wind blew it back and it just hit the window.

Mine is just hunkering down and crying like a little girl.

But then again, I have tokophobia. It's always doing that

[Becks]

i think my womb just snapped in fright

Mine ran away screaming into the windy, rainy day.

Wait, I think the wind blew it back and it just hit the window.

[Seshat]

Its standard response around here no matter what the problem. Yet when you ask for help from a dietician/exercise specialist you get stone silence or the referals go missing.

(This was re 'you're too fat' from doctors)

Gizmo, that's just disgusting. If they honestly believe excess adipose tissue is your problem, they should be giving you dietician/nutritionist access, and access to a physiotherapist or other exercise specialist.

AND they should be monitoring the results. If simple diet and exercise changes don't work, they should be doing the testing to determine whether to refer you to an endocrinologist or gastroenterologist; and send you to a behavioural specialist of some sort.

The endocrinologist and gastroenterologist can help you if there's a physical problem.
The behavioural specialist can help you if you have a psychological issue around eating or exercising.

And let's face it, in modern western society, almost everyone has a psych issue about food and/or exercise. Either that, or they're (a) very lucky, or (b) have already worked on it.

[wagegoth]

the school headmistress was telling me that everytime one of my daughters classmates goes to hospital her parents are asked if they want to put a DNR in action. Even if the classmate is in for something minor.

That is one of the most evil things I have ever heard. I'm sitting here fighting back the tears.

[Gizmo]

But nooooo. I'm 'fat'. And that is the cause, not symptom, of my problems. According to them. (I call bullshit.)

Its standard response around here no matter what the problem. Yet when you ask for help from a dietician/exercise specialist you get stone silence or the referals go missing.

We also have the doctors who use "you're too young to have {x} whenever I report a problem to them. Well that doesn't help me when I'm suffering from {x} does it?

As for the original OP and doctor, he probably wouldn't have got out of there without a large rant from me if he tried that. At least back it up with "because your baby looks fatter than normal I just want to check for {y}." or something! Otherwise leave me/my baby the hell alone!

[Sapphire Silk]

i do actually have a disabled child and can still remember the feelings i had when my family doctor told me the results of the amnio i had. child with brain damage might not survive birth and if it did then it wouldnt live long (16 in 4 months !!! ner ner)

the special school bub goes to has visiting 3rd year (studying) doctors. theyre learning to look at disabled children as children first not just as a disability.

the school headmistress was telling me that everytime one of my daughters classmates goes to hospital her parents are asked if they want to put a DNR in action. Even if the classmate is in for something minor.

I think its a fabulous idea to give doctors classes in bedside manners. Over the years we've had some wonderful doctors and some doctors who i'd like to poke the eyes out of.

The decision as to whether continue a pregnancy like that is a deeply personal one. The role of health care providers is to give information, and support whatever decision the patient makes. Learning something about that patient's values and desires for their care is a good starting place a lot of doctors miss out on.

All hospitals are required to ask every patient if they have advanced directives (of which a DNR is one form) or if they want advanced directives. Even minor procedures have risks, and providers should know what families want in those cases. A lot of heartache has resulted from providers not knowing the patient's feelings on advanced directives and get care they wouldn't have wanted had the frank discussion taken place.

13 and a half pounds !!!!

i think my womb just snapped in fright

Mine too. That's a big baby. Some babies are Large for Gestational Age . . . they hit the big side of the developmental charts. Sometimes it means a problem. Some times not. Macrosomia occurs in cases of Gestational Diabetes. Low blood sugars in baby is usually the worst of the problem and is easily identified and corrected.

[georgie]

13 and a half pounds !!!!

i think my womb just snapped in fright

[HappyFun Ball]

You gotta hate doctors that are insensitive. Me, I prefer a female, female doctor because she at least knows what being pregnant is like (And I do know that not all women have had babies).

With my first son, I got big really really fast, I thought I was going to have twins, but the ultrasound showed only one baby. It got to where I could not walk, could not get comfortable, could not sleep and this was at 8 months along. I begged the doctors to induce at 8-1/2 months.. I was miserable! I already had two kids and I had never experienced this amount of pain or immobility. I knew that the last month of pregnancy is mainly for the baby to gain weight. I kept getting the asshat doctor on call, he would just tell me to "get some rest" and he was the doctor I saw for the every 2 weeks and half of the weekly visit.. I pleaded with him to induce, but he insisted that they did not induce until I was 2 weeks late. I hit 40 weeks and I get everyone giving me "How to go into labor" advice, jumping jacks, sex.. Everything I could not do because it was excruciating to just sit still, let along have sex or do jumping jacks. I get to 9-1/2 months and lo and behold! I see a different doctor in the same office and he tells me that magical word "Induce". Anyways, when my son was born I found out why I was so miserable... He weighed 13 pounds and 6 ounces. Now he's a bit small for his age.

[Cat]

One of my younger cousins was premature (I forget my how much) but I truly believe he had to be...he is now a gentle giant (he hands his clothes down to his father....his father is 6') Nature knew what she was doing there!

Doctors, like most professions, have the good ones and the asshats. Sorry to those here who have gotten the latter.