Guy came in with abdominal pain and was (correctly) sent to the souped up urgent care section. Guy got some morphine while he was there, and then was sent to the OMG You're Dying!!! section as his heart rate went down to the upper 30s and his rectal temp went down to 95. He got warmed up, maintained an appropriate temp without the Bair Hugger and had a slightly less horrific heart rate and so he came to hang with me in the you're probably getting admitted section while he waited for a bed upstairs.
Me: Hi, I'm TPM, I'm your nurse, how are you doing?
Guy: I'm in PAIN and I need something NOW! Moan moan moan.
Me: I'm sorry you're in so much pain. Would you like some Motrin?
Guy: I'm in REAL PAIN and I need something stronger.
Me: No. You almost died when we gave you morphine so you won't be getting any more narcotics at this point.
Guy: <Insert typical threats, such as I'm a racist, I'm just trying to make him suffer, I'm discriminating against him because he's poor> I'm just going to leave then and go to Other Local Hospital.
Me: That's certainly within your rights, though I would strongly advise against it as you almost died earlier and you need close monitoring. If you'd like to leave, please sign this paper and you'll be free to go.
Guy: I need to talk to your supervisor!
I grabbed the charge nurse, who is a no-nonsense 20 year Army vet.
Charge Nurse: Hi! Remember me? I came and helped move you when you started trying to die. I understand you are unhappy with the current pain management plan?
Guy: Blarghle blah blah threat blah blah GIMME DILALALA NOW
Charge Nurse: No. None of us will risk killing you or losing our licenses by giving you medication that almost killed you earlier. You can either accept that or leave. There will be no negotiations, as pain won't kill you but pain medicine will.
Guy ended up AMA'ing a few hours later anyways (for a different reason) but he did shut up about pain medicine.
Me: Hi, I'm TPM, I'm your nurse, how are you doing?
Guy: I'm in PAIN and I need something NOW! Moan moan moan.
Me: I'm sorry you're in so much pain. Would you like some Motrin?
Guy: I'm in REAL PAIN and I need something stronger.
Me: No. You almost died when we gave you morphine so you won't be getting any more narcotics at this point.
Guy: <Insert typical threats, such as I'm a racist, I'm just trying to make him suffer, I'm discriminating against him because he's poor> I'm just going to leave then and go to Other Local Hospital.
Me: That's certainly within your rights, though I would strongly advise against it as you almost died earlier and you need close monitoring. If you'd like to leave, please sign this paper and you'll be free to go.
Guy: I need to talk to your supervisor!
I grabbed the charge nurse, who is a no-nonsense 20 year Army vet.
Charge Nurse: Hi! Remember me? I came and helped move you when you started trying to die. I understand you are unhappy with the current pain management plan?
Guy: Blarghle blah blah threat blah blah GIMME DILALALA NOW
Charge Nurse: No. None of us will risk killing you or losing our licenses by giving you medication that almost killed you earlier. You can either accept that or leave. There will be no negotiations, as pain won't kill you but pain medicine will.
Guy ended up AMA'ing a few hours later anyways (for a different reason) but he did shut up about pain medicine.

I know pain sucks, and it sucks when you have to just suffer through it, but yeah, you're clearly not gonna be giving him any more pain meds when he almost died from them before!


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