Painfully Unfunny (or Why I Won't Dine-In at My Favorite Restaurant Anymore)

[firecat88]

Thought about putting this in the Morons In Management section, but the person in question isn't my boss. Thus, putting it here.

There's this Italian restaurant on Main Street that I love. I've never had a bad meal from it and, bonus points, I never get sick from the food there (other places are hit-or-miss). Tonight will be my last time actually dining in. From now on, if I want something from there, I'll get it to-go. The reason? One of the owners of the place.

The actual owner I have no problem with because she is also the head chef and, thus, always in the kitchen and I never see her anyway. Her husband, however, is a huge jerk. He's one of those types of people who *thinks* he's being hilarious, but his humor is very rude and very condescending. We went there tonight with some friends and the following happened:

First, as he was showing someone to their table (something he does on occasion), he muttered something along the lines of 'Ever hear of smaller bites?' to my mom and I on the way past our table. Then, not 20 seconds later, I feel a hard thump against my wheel. Didn't think much of it until it happened again. When I turned, there he was, grinning at me. He then proceeded to, while I was nowhere near the end of the table and, in fact, as close as I could get to the table without actually sitting on it, tell me that I was in the way. I don't remember much of what happened after because I was too busy resisting the urge to say to him "Y'know what, dude? Bite me.", but I vaguely recall him going 'Are you stalking me? *sneer*' as I was trying to get past him to leave.

If this was a one-time thing, I could let it go. But, no. He does stuff like this every. single. time. we go there. The only thing he's ever done once, and I think it was because I gave him such a look of 'go f*** yourself' that he's scared to do it again, is take my plate from me before I've had a chance to even touch my food.

My mom and I have decided that, because of his behavior, we're no longer eating in the restaurant. Take-out only. Because never in my life have I actually come *that* close to actually telling someone to go f*** themselves.

[Seshat]

Have you told the wife what her husband does to customers?

Or flat-out told the husband how you feel?

[Rock Lobster]

This guy needs his behind kicked by Gordon Ramsay! Sorry your experience sucked. I guess the owner doesn't want customers to dine at his restaurant.

[raudf]

See, you have far more control than I do. I'd have rightfully gone off like a tactical nuke after the first time. There's a time an place for "teasing," (which we all know is what he'll call it) and in his case, it's neither.

I encourage you or your mother to speak to the wife. She might not realize how badly he effects business, especially repeat business. Eating out is a treat, not a torture!

[Pixilated]

I understand you like the food, and that it's safe for you to eat, but I'm not sure I'd patronize the place at all anymore, and yes, I'd definitely let the wife know why.

And you definitely have more patience than I do. I'd have told him off in a very loud voice at the first crack.

[firecat88]

Honestly, I kinda surprised myself at the amount of restraint I showed last night. I don't know if it's because we were out with friends and I didn't want to say bad words in front of their son or what.

Also, I'm not sure that he actually even does this stuff to anyone else. O.o What leads me to this conclusion is the going-away party that my mom's former co-workers threw for her when she transferred to the main hospital. There were over a dozen people in our group and the only ones he spoke to the whole night were my mom and I.

[Teskeria]

I apologize if you have clarified this before, but you said wheel. Are you in a wheelchair? If so, and he is only harassing you, then he is actually attempting (and succeeding) to drive away customers in wheelchairs. which is discriminatory. And should be reported to whoever overlooks ADA (or the equiv) in your area.
because you may only have seen it happen to you and your mom, but it is very possible he has driven or is driving other handicapped patrons away.
and yes, tell his wife. If you are in a wheelchair, perhaps open with 'What does your husband have against wheelchair customers?'

[Captain Trips]

If it were me, and I'm not advocating this, I'd have run over his foot. I've done it before.

I normally have no mobility problems. But when it involves being on my feet all day on a hard surface, no way. I have plantar fascitis, so after a while it just hurts too much to stand. And at Comic Con, being so big and spread out around the Sandy Eggo downtown area, I have to rent a mobility scooter. I've had jokers put their feet in front of me, looking right at me, and they are then surprised that I run over their feet. (Does no real damage, I must add.)

I've never had to run over any feet at the county fair, though. Or the zoo. Only at the con. And usually it isn't even paying attendees - it's usually one of the idiots who come downtown to gawk at the geeks.

[mathnerd]

If it were me, and I'm not advocating this, I'd have run over his foot. I've done it before.

I normally have no mobility problems. But when it involves being on my feet all day on a hard surface, no way. I have plantar fascitis, so after a while it just hurts too much to stand. And at Comic Con, being so big and spread out around the Sandy Eggo downtown area, I have to rent a mobility scooter. I've had jokers put their feet in front of me, looking right at me, and they are then surprised that I run over their feet. (Does no real damage, I must add.)

I've never had to run over any feet at the county fair, though. Or the zoo. Only at the con. And usually it isn't even paying attendees - it's usually one of the idiots who come downtown to gawk at the geeks.

My 11 year old uses a wheelchair about 75% of the time. You'd be surprised how rude some people can be. Most people are polite, but there have been numerous occasions when people have stepped out in front of him (and he couldn't stop even if he wanted to) or flat out run into him. He's 11 and typically clutzy for his age. Add to that the task of managing a wheelchair and he can't stop or get out of people's way as fast as somebody who's using their feet. My best (or worst) issue was a crazy old man in a parking lot, who ran over the walker the child uses to transfer in and out of his chair. The only good thing that came out of that was that the story got posted on "Not Always Right."

http://notalwaysright.com/not-all-kn...ng-armor/24174

People can be idiots.

[Sapphire Silk]

My best (or worst) issue was a crazy old man in a parking lot, who ran over the walker the child uses to transfer in and out of his chair.

People can be idiots.

People can be DICKS! What an ass . . . I'm glad he had to pay for the walker; I'm sure they're not cheap. I recall paying about 80 bucks for my crutches, I think a basic walker no bells or whistles is at least the same.

[mathnerd]

Take what you think a walker might cost and double it because it's a pediatric size. The small sizes run about $175. I can't wait until he gets big enough to be able to use adult sized aids. They're so much less expensive.

[Ophbalance]

I've noticed that if you're not on foot, then for some reason that brings out the craptastic attitudes in folks for some reason. We went to a fairly famous amusement park in Florida about 6 years ago, back when two of my children were old enough to be in a stroller. Exiting the park at close one of the nights we were there, I finally gave up trying to be nice to the crowd. I was just dumbfounded at people's inability to see a double stroller... and the damage it would inflict to their bare flip flop wearing feet. So I eventually gave up trying to save folks from themselves, and pushed on the best I could.

But in a similar vain, my wife uses a chair for trips out of the home. It's just unreal how much of a second class citizen you become when you're in a chair and no longer at eye level. Although I think the only folks to have their feet run over are our own children at this point .

[XCashier]

...he is actually attempting (and succeeding) to drive away customers in wheelchairs. which is discriminatory. And should be reported to whoever overlooks ADA (or the equiv) in your area.
because you may only have seen it happen to you and your mom, but it is very possible he has driven or is driving other handicapped patrons away.
and yes, tell his wife.

^ THIS! Definitely report the jerk, whether to his wife or to the appropriate authorities. His behavior is completely unacceptable and he needs to be held accountable.

The only good thing that came out of that was that the story got posted on "Not Always Right."

http://notalwaysright.com/not-all-kn...ng-armor/24174

People can be idiots.

(I found out later that they’d noted the elderly man’s tag number and had gone inside to report the incident to the manager. The police were called and the elderly man was held responsible for the damage to the walker.)

Big kudos to those two young men who helped you out and reported the mean jerk. I sure hope that nasty old guy had fun explaining himself to the police.

[RayvenQ]

I used to work in a place that rented out mobility scooters, so I always find myself more aware of people using mobility aids and such, and since I'm a nice guy, i always give them the space they need even if it means me stopping what I'm doing. There was this one time an old woman couldn't get her scooter started, she was asking for people to help, but nobody did, luckily, I was willing to help, and not only that, had a good idea of how her scooter was put together (I'd learned how to take apart and put together that particular model while I was working at the mobility place) went over, took a quick look, flicked a switch underneath (the cut off switch that this model had for general inspections because the battery was a pain in the rear to disconnect) and off she went.

Although there is one guy around here that I dont like, because he really gives a bad repuation to people who use mobility scooters, he drives as fast as he can (not really that dangerous, when i was delivering/collecting scooters I'd pretty much go top speed in them without a problem, although on the 3 wheelers cornering at full speed was tricky) but he also combines that with the really annoying and dangerous habit of driving as close as possible to people when passing them, hell, the other day I'm pretty sure the side of his tyre was amilimeter or so away from kissing the side of my show)

[Eevie]

Well, a lot of people are saying to go to the authorities, but perhaps it doesn't need to go there. It's just a hunch, a small one, but I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility. He might actually have Asberger's. While I'm not saying that's absolutely ANY excuse for that, I will say he might just need a push in right direction. If he has a grin on his face like he's joking, then I don't think he realizes that he's hurting business.

I myself, a diagnosed Asberger's, will do similar things. Often I don't realize I've done something wrong and it will only dawn on me until about 10-20 minutes after it happens. That, and it used to be really hard for me to read people. Sometimes I just couldn't read when people had enough of whatever I was doing. Not that it's any excuse, but it could be an explanation. I'd write a letter or e-mail the restaurant, detailing exactly what's going on. Perhaps he just needs a push (or a nice hard shove) in the right direction.

Of course, I'm not ruling out the complete and total asshole bit, the stuff he did is usually reserved for close friends who are used to that kind of thing, and even then it's pushing it a little, it depends on the relationship.

Just see what happens if you shoot a quick e-mail. If things don't improve, move from there.