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What is this, Asshole Day?

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  • #16
    Quoth Marlowe View Post
    When the poverty line becomes a seemingly impossible goal and unimaginable wealth, you got problems
    I know the feeling. Although I do finally make five figures, only barely.
    "Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages." - Terry Pratchett
    Emissary of Minong - my blog and its Facebook page

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    • #17
      Quoth Sarah Valentine View Post
      Is it wrong that I want to kick that woman and her child, as well as the asshole who refused to help you into a shark tank?
      poor shark! what are you trying to do kill it?

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      • #18
        Quoth Dentarthurdent View Post
        I know the feeling. Although I do finally make five figures, only barely.
        join the club

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        • #19
          Quoth Marlowe View Post
          It was like he was asking me if I had really just dropped trou and crapped in an old lady's handbag in the bakeware aisle.


          You're hilarious, Marlowe! Terribly sorry to hear about your babies, though.
          "Redheads have at least a 95% chance of being gorgeous. They're also concentrated evil." - Irv

          "This is all strange, uncharted territory and your hamster only has three legs." - Gravekeeper

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          • #20
            I'm poor, too, but I don't care what people think of that. I'm quite pleased with the way I'm able to make a little go a long way. Well, God does that. I just follow.
            "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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            • #21
              Quoth Food Lady View Post
              I'm poor, too, but I don't care what people think of that. I'm quite pleased with the way I'm able to make a little go a long way.

              Same. At my college I was pretty much the only student there without a trust fund, and the ones without formal trust funds were given handouts by Daddy every time they bothered to ask. The way I look at it, it's character building. I'm learning skills, hardship, and self-determination that I wouldn't have got if I'd just sauntered straight into an associate's job at my Dad's law firm or been given an "in" at Dow Jones right out of school.

              While I am religious though, I don't quite go for God deciding on what to do before I do. I mean, the guy's around, but it's more like a hands-off kind of approach. It's comforting to have, but I consider and tackle things in my own way, and I'm a better person for it.
              "Asking an Irish girl to tone it down a notch is about the same as asking a wolf to leave the sheep alone. Good luck with that. " - Jester, about me

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              • #22
                Quoth Marlowe View Post
                Man: SOO? *glances at arm* What did you do to yourself, anyway?

                Once again, we have the "Dear God, what have you DONE in this old woman's handbag??!!" tone of voice.

                Me: Well, I, uh, I have a stab wound...
                Man: You got STABBED??
                You really need to work on the story. Something along the lines of:
                I was shopping in [Expense district]. Looking for [expensive shoes]. I had just left [exclusive store] when I heard a woman scream.

                You race down a dark alley to find a couple of guys trying to rape a young girl. Then fill in a good description of how you drop the first guy. You take a knife to the arm while trying to shield the girl. Then you drop the other attacker.

                Yeah, that's the ticket.
                Life is too short to not eat popcorn.
                Save the Ales!
                Toys for Tots at Rooster's Cafe

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                • #23
                  Quoth csquared View Post
                  You really need to work on the story. Something along the lines of:
                  I was shopping in [Expense district]. Looking for [expensive shoes]. I had just left [exclusive store] when I heard a woman scream.

                  You race down a dark alley to find a couple of guys trying to rape a young girl. Then fill in a good description of how you drop the first guy. You take a knife to the arm while trying to shield the girl. Then you drop the other attacker.

                  Yeah, that's the ticket.
                  Alternately, you had this beef with a guy trying to low-ball you on your artwork, who knocked you down in the midst of aggressive negotiations. You retaliated in kind by kicking his ass. He came back a few days later with a knife. You took a knife to the arm in self-defense before breaking his leg and dropping him on his dome.




                  Wait.

                  I've heard that one before...
                  PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                  There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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                  • #24
                    See, I'm rather evil and I'm afraid I would set the mother of the little darlings who have the obsession with money up for a huge fall. Something along the lines of "Yes, I am poor. You see, my mommy spent all MY money on clothes and make-up and haircuts and pretty fingernails and things for HER. I hope YOUR mommy doesn't do that to YOU or you might end up poor like me. Buh-bye now!"

                    And exeunt.

                    Wonder what happens next time Mommy takes Junior to her next hairdressing or fingernail appointment or goes to try on pretty clothes...
                    "Bring me knitting!" (The Doctor - not the one you were expecting)

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                    • #25
                      Quoth Marlowe View Post
                      SC: Why don't you have one? Everyone has one.
                      Me: Well, I-
                      SC: *sneer* Are you POOR?
                      I had one... but they took it away because I kept running down snotty little rich brats. Wanna come outside and see?

                      Me: Well, I, uh, I have a stab wound...
                      Man: You got STABBED??
                      Yeah the last jerk who gave a load of attitude instead of help was trying to fight me off as I bludgeoned him to death with a pet carrier.

                      Me: No, Ma'am, I don't.
                      GBM: *BIG SIGH* Are you suuuuuure?
                      Wait lemme think... oh crap yeah I do... you need help beating the hell out of you and your child? Well if you insist!

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