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It's that time of year. The weather is turning warmer (it's been in the low 80's the past few days) so I decided that since our local amusement park is open on the weekends I would go get an early dose of roller coaster induced adrenaline. Where I live, that means Kennywood Park, outside Pittsburgh. It was a beautiful spring day and because it was a Saturday, the first day the park opened for the season, there were tons of families with their kids running all over the place. I am a roller coaster junkie. On all of the coasters there are signs that have a picture of one of the parks mascots that say, "You have to be taller than me to ride (this ride)." Some of the coasters also have a sign that says that you need to have a partner to ride. Now you know where this is going.
Like a mouse in a maze, I slowly wound my way through the serpentine array of pipes that is the line queue, I was maybe 20 people away from the proverbial piece of cheese at the end of this maze. The cheese in this case was riding The Thunderbolt, one of the best wooden coasters on the planet. Patiently awaiting the crowd already on the platform to clear and the rope to be opened, thereby releasing me into my Valhalla, I heard the employee tell a kid, who was maybe 10, that he was not big enough to ride. The kid, who looked sad but seemed to take it in stride, turned and walked off the ramp. No problem, right? Guess again.
Not really paying attention to anything, taking in the sights and smells of the park, I see a woman, looking pissed and practically dragging the kid who had just been told he was not big enough, pushing their way past the line that I just spent almost an hour traversing. The following is almost word-for-word as it unfolded when the mom from hell reached the front of the line.
SM: Stupid mom.
PE: Park employee.
SM: My son has permission to ride any ride he wants. You can't tell him he can't.
PE: I'm sorry, but he is too small to ride this ride and even if he was, he needs a partner to ride. It is a safety rule. I'm sorry.
SM: My son is getting on this ride. You can't stop him. I'll ride with him!
(Son looks like he wants to crawl into a crack)
PE: I'm sorry. I can't allow him to ride, even if you ride with him. Safety regulations are there to protect the riders. The safety bars and belts are not meant for someone so small. He will slide around too much and may slip out of the restraints.
SM: He wants to ride it and he is GOING to ride it!
PE: (getting mad) Maybe next season, but not today. Please take your child and let him have fun on the ones that he can ride.
SM: I'm going to the park police. They'll tell you he can ride if he has my permission!
She leaves, dragging the poor kid like he was a rag doll, not to be seen again by me.
Really lady, (and I use the term very loosely) Do you really want him to possibly get hurt or killed just to let him have a thrill. Why not give him a skateboard and let him play on the Parkway East. The Squirrel Hill Tunnel ought to be a ton of fun this time of day.
Stupid asshat.
Like a mouse in a maze, I slowly wound my way through the serpentine array of pipes that is the line queue, I was maybe 20 people away from the proverbial piece of cheese at the end of this maze. The cheese in this case was riding The Thunderbolt, one of the best wooden coasters on the planet. Patiently awaiting the crowd already on the platform to clear and the rope to be opened, thereby releasing me into my Valhalla, I heard the employee tell a kid, who was maybe 10, that he was not big enough to ride. The kid, who looked sad but seemed to take it in stride, turned and walked off the ramp. No problem, right? Guess again.
Not really paying attention to anything, taking in the sights and smells of the park, I see a woman, looking pissed and practically dragging the kid who had just been told he was not big enough, pushing their way past the line that I just spent almost an hour traversing. The following is almost word-for-word as it unfolded when the mom from hell reached the front of the line.
SM: Stupid mom.
PE: Park employee.
SM: My son has permission to ride any ride he wants. You can't tell him he can't.
PE: I'm sorry, but he is too small to ride this ride and even if he was, he needs a partner to ride. It is a safety rule. I'm sorry.
SM: My son is getting on this ride. You can't stop him. I'll ride with him!
(Son looks like he wants to crawl into a crack)
PE: I'm sorry. I can't allow him to ride, even if you ride with him. Safety regulations are there to protect the riders. The safety bars and belts are not meant for someone so small. He will slide around too much and may slip out of the restraints.
SM: He wants to ride it and he is GOING to ride it!
PE: (getting mad) Maybe next season, but not today. Please take your child and let him have fun on the ones that he can ride.
SM: I'm going to the park police. They'll tell you he can ride if he has my permission!
She leaves, dragging the poor kid like he was a rag doll, not to be seen again by me.
Really lady, (and I use the term very loosely) Do you really want him to possibly get hurt or killed just to let him have a thrill. Why not give him a skateboard and let him play on the Parkway East. The Squirrel Hill Tunnel ought to be a ton of fun this time of day.
Stupid asshat.
and there was a woman and a girl ahead of me and the girl kept going "I don't know if I want to go on this ride" and the woman kept saying "It's not scary, Honey, you'll love it!" Repeat for half the wait for the ride. Space Mountain is a scary ride! It's a roller coaster in the dark, and the cars are single seats so you can't even hold on to someone. I hope that girl was ok. 
Ok" But according to their parents, we've ruined their day? Sheesh.
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