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  • #1

    I'm Going To Hell

    I was at a bookstore the other day, and spent about $200 on some awesome books, and I got the best Cashier ever, he was a Nabokov freak like me. So we talked for a bit seeing as there were no other customers talking about how this book was good, and that one was confusing, and the other one was just plain trippy. So we finally make it to Lolita, which is a must if you're talking about Nabokov or Kubrick (Excellant movie of an Excellant book) and apparantly a woman buying a few books next to us overheard this.

    SB: Super-Bitch
    Me: Lover of Literature

    SB: That book was slander against normal minded people
    Me: Lady, it was just a book. A well written love story.
    SB: It depicts a pedophile as a main character!!!
    Me: I know, I did read it. And if you even looked past that you'd know the story has absolutely nothing to do with pedophilia but with-
    SB: BLASPHEMY!!!! YOU'RE A HEATHEN AND YOU WILL BURN IN HELL!!!
    Me: And I will enjoy every minute of it since all the best people in the world are seemingly going there. Enjoy the Saints, I'll take Nabokov, Da Vinci, and Mencken over Peter, Paul, and Jesus any day.

    She shut up quite fast. Why can't people not comment on what I read? Whenever Lolita is brought up, and I say it's my favorite story, someone has to, Just has to call me a pedophile or something like that. One girl in my German class was suspended because she called me a pedophile in the middle of class for reading it. I know I was probably mean, but I get really offended when people start talking about my books without bringing anything to the table supporting their facts. I love discussions over why Lolita isn't the best book ever (It's still my favorite) but if all your going to do is tell me that it's a sin because what it's about, then you're gonna get my full fury. That goes for any book.
    It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.
    ~~~H.L. Mencken
    Tags: None
  • #2
    I'm going to be necro-posting here in a couple months after I've had time to actually track down a copy of Lolita, buy it, read it, let it digest, and re-read it while considering the things that came to mind while digesting. Yeah, it's a lot of work, but you can't really talk about a book until you've read it at least twice, especially not talking shit about it like that Bible-Freak* was trying to do.


    As for the Bible Freak, here's a little bit of a tale:

    Since the McDonald's I used to work at was about 3 blocks from a Bible College we got a lot of Christians and Bible-Freaks in there. Most of them were open to logical debate while I was eating lunch or off work. In fact, my score is 30-and-4 for convincing them evolution and creationism can co-exist** while I, in turn, was converted from strict Atheist to Agnostic (or maybe Deist, I'm not sure).

    In fact, only one student turned out to be a Bible-Freak in the whole time I was there, and she was in their first semester. Considering most Bible-Freaks, when directly questioned, will admit they've hardly cracked the cover on the book they claim to live by... well, it really makes you really think, doesn't it?

    Anyway... she went off on me when I suggested that Jehovah was more concerned that a person do good deeds than in petty things like whose name they did the good deeds in, and that someone like Gahndi would still be able to get into Heaven even though he was a pagan. After she had her hissy-fit, going on about how only people who have accepted Jesus Christ will be Saved and Gahndi is burning in hell, I responded "Stuff like that is why I'm not a Christian. If your god is that petty, then I don't want to be 'Saved'," with extra sneer on 'Saved'.

    Cue me walking out while she was sputtering over that one.

    Next time I saw one of the guys, he came up, apologized to me, and said that they'd had a Talk with her about the importance of how she acts when representing her faith to someone with different beliefs. I told him it was copacetic, and I knew she was the exception, not the rule, with Christians.






    *Bible-Freak/n: A term, derogatory in connotation, meant to create a clear distinction in conversation between sane, rational Christians and mentally unstable zealots who have replaced logical thought with regurgitated dogma.
    **The key is, apparently, to focus on the points that 'Day' does not necessarily equal 24hrs, since Jehovah is supposed to have existed before the sun and earth, and that the stages of creation pretty much equal the stages of planetary development and the evolution of animals.
    ...WHY DO YOU TEMPT WHAT LITTLE FAITH IN HUMANITY I HAVE!?! -- Kalga
    And I want a pony for Christmas but neither of us is getting what we want OK! What you are asking is impossible. -- Wicked Lexi

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    • #3
      Quoth JustADude View Post
      In fact, only one student turned out to be a Bible-Freak in the whole time I was there, and she was in their first semester. Considering most Bible-Freaks, when directly questioned, will admit they've hardly cracked the cover on the book they claim to live by... well, it really makes you really think, doesn't it?.
      Think? No, it happens far to often to require any thought, really.

      Sigh about the foibles of humanity? Yea, verily, yea!

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      • #4
        Quoth Aldous View Post
        Why can't people not comment on what I read?
        I don't care what her opinion of the book may have been, it simply is rude to butt in on other people's conversations. The only exception might be if the conversation is a request for information and the person hears the wrong directions or like being given.

        People may tolerate the interruption if the rude one is supporting their opinion, but it still is rude to do it.
        "Ignorance is no excuse for a law."
        .................................................. ..................- Alfred E. Newman

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        • #5
          Am I a pedophile for having a crush on certain book charachters that are kids long past my childhood? It's a book with a pretty story in it. The end.
          How was I supposed to know someone was slipping you Birth Control in the food I've been making for you lately?

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          • #6
            next time, try this with the buttinski:

            'excuse me, EXCUSE me' (once you have their attention) 'this IS an A and B conversation, so C your way out of it. have a nice day.' (fake smile then turn your back on them)

            should do the trick...unless they're persistent, like flatulence from hell.
            look! it's ghengis khan!
            Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them. (so sayeth the irv)

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            • #7
              Quoth South Texan
              I don't care what her opinion of the book may have been; it simply is rude to butt in on other people's conversations.
              I completely agree.

              Also, in light of Harry Potter mania, is it odd that this makes me think of all the crazies out there suggesting that HP is the work of the debbil, and that kids should not read it, lest they end up in hell?

              If you're going to criticise a book, at least have the decency to have read it before doing so.
              "In the end I was the mean girl/or somebody's in between girl"~Neko Case

              “You don't need many words if you already know what you're talking about.” ~William Stafford

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              • #8
                Quoth myswtghst View Post
                Also, in light of Harry Potter mania, is it odd that this makes me think of all the crazies out there suggesting that HP is the work of the debbil, and that kids should not read it, lest they end up in hell?
                No, it's not odd. Just remember there are more "sheep" in any religion than "students". All it takes is one preacher/rabbi/cleric/etc to start a religious protest. Majority of people that says "don't read this because it's the work of the devil" either didn't read it or parroting their religious "leaders". That goes for any religion not just Christianity. Just look at people from PETA.
                I've lost my mind ages ago. If you find it, please hide it.

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                • #9
                  the other side of the coin to that is the folks that think harry potter is greater than sliced bread ever was, they are very FUNDEMENTAL about the how harry potter makes the air smell so much sweeter. I like harry potter alot, i read all 7 books now but there are greater books, far greater books, check out jack london or phillip dick
                  or my hero ron hubbard (just kidding)

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                  • #10
                    Quoth JustADude View Post
                    *Bible-Freak/n: A term, derogatory in connotation, meant to create a clear distinction in conversation between sane, rational Christians and mentally unstable zealots who have replaced logical thought with regurgitated dogma.
                    I've always called them 'fundies' short for fundamentalist. Seriously though, I think it's really cool that you can engage people openly and honestly where you work. It's no secret that I'm pagan and I have many Christian friends (Delphae, you out there?). I have to say I've experienced prejudice from both sides. Keep up the good work.
                    Our brains are smarter than we think they am!

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                    • #11
                      Having not read 'Lolita' (despite practically living in the library) I cannot comment on the status of your soul for liking said book.

                      However, in case, I offer this:

                      Any day you're looking down at the dirt instead of up at the dirt is a good day.

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                      • #12
                        Quoth habitofbeingright View Post
                        the other side of the coin to that is the folks that think harry potter is greater than sliced bread ever was, they are very FUNDEMENTAL about the how harry potter makes the air smell so much sweeter. I like harry potter alot, i read all 7 books now but there are greater books, far greater books, check out jack london or phillip dick
                        or my hero ron hubbard (just kidding)
                        I agree. Harry Potter are not the greatest books out there.
                        The Phenomenon they have created, however, is a different story. People were () clamoring for the next book. They were rereading and analyzing and discussing. I had no less than FIVE people I've never talked to at work ask me today how far I was - when I was rereading 4 before I do 5 and 6 and reread 7. lol

                        Best books ever? No. Amazing effect on society? Yes. By far.

                        Which reminds me that I've tried to read Anna Kerenina about 3 times. Time for another go.

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