Whereupon Survival Instinct Overrides Testosterone

[MMATM]

Warning: Language.
Apologies for the length. It's run a bit longer than I wanted.

Let's quickly recap my day:
(9:40am) Wake up and go to class.
(10:10am-1:10pm) Classes.
(1:20pm) Grab lunch and eat it while waiting for lab to start.
(2:30pm-4:20pm) Lab. It's "design your own lab to solve the problem" day. Superb.
(4:45pm-6:00pm) All-you-can-eat wings at a nearby restaurant/bar with the paintball team.
(6:15pm) Witness lanky white paintball guy take on Asian video-game feet of other paintball guy in DDR. White guy loses. Badly.
(6:30pm-9:30pm) Laser tag with paintball team. Steamroll all competition, eventually are required to split up our team so we don't dominate so much.
(9:45pm) Get free pizza from Sbarro as they're closing. The employee is officially the man for giving the six of us a whole large cheese pizza cut in sixths.
(10:00pm) Finish dropping off other paintball guys and call girlfriend who needs a ride to Target.
(10:10pm, 10:15pm, and 10:20pm) Calls from girlfriend, but phone is malfunctioning repeatedly. Become frustrated.
(10:30pm) Use texts to successfully communicate that I'm going to come by her building soon and ask if she wants anything from Dunkies.

And here my day starts coming apart and the real story begins.

Once inside Dunkies, I get in line behind the two other people that are waiting, and who are currently being served. Guy and girlfriend (apparently). Guy is unshaven (probably for days, maybe studying for finals next week?) and somewhat agitated. I begin keeping a wary eye on him while I check the drive-thru timer. Timer indicates that next car has been waiting for four minutes. I rationalize that this is probably indicative of the time taken to make guy and girlfriend's food. Guy rationalizes differently.

SC: Unkempt and obviously aggravated 20ish-year-old.
GF: Girlfriend of the above. God knows why.
DD: Dunkies' employee. A very fast server (important).
Me: 5'11", ~150lbs, brown hair, blue eyes, dressed in a knee-length pea coat and armed with a hidden kubaton.

(Note that there are two people sitting at one of the tables, and two people behind me in line at this point. I am guessing, from the general manner of the people, that at least one was an employee taking his break. However, as I couldn't really see them from my spot in line, I cannot be sure.)

SC: What's taking so long? (Or something similar)
DD: Nothing, here you go sir. (Places coffees on counter.) That'll be $XX.XX.
SC: The fuck, (Hauls out wallet.) you took fucking long enough.
DD: Sorry, there was a car in the drive thru. I was serving them when you arrived.
SC: Well what's he doing bullshitting around there for? (Indicating on-break or off-the-clock employee.)
DD: He's (mumble, either "on break" or "clocked out" or some excuse along those lines).
SC: What? Well fuck this! You're so goddamn slow making fucking coffee. (Walks to sugar and stirrers while GF waits for change.) You're lucky I don't come over there and bust your head open.
Me: *ADRENALINE SPIKE* (To SC, in head) Whoa, take it easy dude. Sure, maybe he took a while but there's no need to get violent over it. (Aloud) Mmm...
GF: (To DD) Thanks. (Leaves no tip, exits.)
Me: (Watches couple exiting.)
SC: (Death glare when he notices me looking, but keeps walking.)

The rest of the incident was fairly uneventful, and is too long to warrant typing out, but suffice to say that they were out of hot chocolate (my first request) but that I got a coffee instead, quickly and without any hassle. DD agreed that SC's type come out of the woodwork in numbers around holiday time.

After I returned to my car with my new delicious caffeine fix, I realized that keeping my mouth shut was definitely the safest option, as SC (who I affectionately nicknamed "cockgobbler" in my head) was liable to go absolutely apeshit if anyone tried to defuse the situation.
I'm glad I had my kubaton though (highly recommended as one of the very few legal weapons that don't require licenses and can be concealed as well, at least in Massachusetts) as I would likely have had my ass handed to me by SC (much heavier than myself, looked like one of the "yeah I grunt when I lift, because everyone should see how fucking jacked and tan I am" types) had I been without it and opened my mouth. Luckily, my survival instinct kicked in and I wasn't so stupid as to be in either situation.

The rest of my day involved arguing briefly with my girlfriend (though it seemed longer because I hate arguing with her) because we both misunderstood each other's plans, our making up, and my cooking a pot (hooray innovative coffeemaker use!) of orzo in chicken broth.

Anyone else had any close encounters with the violent kind lately?

[ArenaBoy]

1st, cockgobbler is going into the Arena insult dictionary.

2nd, I haven't ran into any violent types as of late, last time that happened I got thrown out of a movie theater (Posted it recently). I also detest going out shopping during the day, I try to go during the morning or the night. I doubly make sure that I avoid going out during the day when it's the holidays.

[CanadaGirl]

GF: (To DD) Thanks. (Leaves no tip, exits.)

At Dunken Donuts? It's fast food. Since when do you tip there?

[BookstoreEscapee]

At Dunken Donuts? It's fast food. Since when do you tip there?

Most of the Dunkin' Donuts around me have tip jars on the counter. I don't always leave a tip, either, though. If I have change I will toss it in but if not, I don't unless I'm getting a large order. If it's just for me it's usually only a hot chocolate (though theirs is not my favorite) and a bit of chocolate-frosted yumminess.

[MMATM]

At Dunken Donuts? It's fast food. Since when do you tip there?

It's not required, but having worked in a similar place (though we were independently-owned) I know how awful some customers can be (e.g. cockgobbler) and so whenever I'm there I'll toss my change and occasionally a buck (if I've ordered a lot or a really pain-in-the-ass thing) into the tip jar. They're actually tip mugs at the Dunkies locations around here. Anyone else notice that? Or is it like a western Massachusetts type of thing?

[Bright_Star]

As soon as he said that "he oughta bust my head open for being so slow" then I would have called the cops. There's no reason to put up wuth that kind of nonsense.

[Pagan]

I also detest going out shopping during the day, I try to go during the morning or the night. I doubly make sure that I avoid going out during the day when it's the holidays.

Around here, it's safest (sanity-wise) to go during the day during the week. It's from 4pm on that people start trolling around the malls, etc. during the Christmas season. And don't even get me started about not going on the weekends! Speaking of which, I need to get my ass out of bed and over to Wally World early tomorrow morning. I've learned, when I start grinding my teeth, tis time to go home!

[MMATM]

1st, cockgobbler is going into the Arena insult dictionary.
<snip>
I also detest going out shopping during the day, I try to go during the morning or the night. I doubly make sure that I avoid going out during the day when it's the holidays.

Actually, it wasn't really during the day. This all happened around 8-9pm. Still "the day" sorta, but since the malls around here close at 10 or 11 depending on the day of the week (they closed at 10 on this particular day), it was pretty much night. And very much night since it gets dark around 4pm here.

[Shabo]

It's not required, but having worked in a similar place (though we were independently-owned) I know how awful some customers can be (e.g. cockgobbler) and so whenever I'm there I'll toss my change and occasionally a buck (if I've ordered a lot or a really pain-in-the-ass thing) into the tip jar. They're actually tip mugs at the Dunkies locations around here. Anyone else notice that? Or is it like a western Massachusetts type of thing?

It's technically not legal since they don't report or pay taxes on those tips as they are paid at least minimum wage. And btw, Dunkies is only really popular in the northeast and Florida. They are all around the country, but not drive down the street and see 3 dunkies on the way kind of popular. So yeah.

I haven't had any potentially violent encounters lately... but it's never too soon to say it won't happen.

[Sliceanddice]

i use to have one i loved... big blue berry muffins, hotchocolate.... and ice cream (there was 31 flavers there too) made me happy tell it became a mexican pastry store and i cant stand mexican pastrys, i know where others are but i dont crave it enough to go out for it, dq has what i want too.

[MMATM]

I don't know about tips being illegal... I'm of the mind that since they're optional and not added in to the bill (being just a jar) it's legal in Massachusetts, since almost everywhere that serves food over counters the way Dunkies (or Bagel Hell, for that matter) does, has said tip jars. Legitimate restaurants (waited tables and such) pay less than minimum wage and report tips as part of the employees' pay because it's cheaper in the long run for the business. Unreported tips that are involuntary (e.g. "15% gratuity added to parties of 8 or more" type tips) would be illegal though, certainly.

Unreported income? Sure, but so is the dollar bill you picked up off the street, so as long as you don't deposit it in the bank and then refuse to pay taxes on it, you'll never find a judge that would rule against you.

However, if it is illegal I feel like that's a law nobody ever follows or cares about (and I do mean "nobody"), like the fact that CD burners technically violate the Digital Millennium Copyright Act but they're still sold in great quantities and nobody gets arrested for owning them (though they could, and the charge would legally hold in court if it ever happened... more on broken DMCA regulations some other time).

I reserve the right to tip, fairly or unfairly, whomever, whenever, and wherever I please.

[Shabo]

I don't know about tips being illegal... I'm of the mind that since they're optional and not added in to the bill (being just a jar) it's legal in Massachusetts, since almost everywhere that serves food over counters the way Dunkies (or Bagel Hell, for that matter) does, has said tip jars. Legitimate restaurants (waited tables and such) pay less than minimum wage and report tips as part of the employees' pay because it's cheaper in the long run for the business.

Difference there is that servers report tips. If anyone is being tipped, and they are not reporting it, it's illegal income. Nobody thinks that the people who use those tip jars make much money, but sometimes they make a good amount per shift... like upwards of $20 per person on a slow night. So it's a pretty big deal. Most DDs that are owned by corporate will reprimand employees that have a tip jar, but I'm sure the private owners don't really care all the time.

Unreported income? Sure, but so is the dollar bill you picked up off the street, so as long as you don't deposit it in the bank and then refuse to pay taxes on it, you'll never find a judge that would rule against you.

A dollar off the street is not classified as income, I don't think, since you didn't work for it. Tips are worked for, and are therefore supposed to be taxed on.

However, if it is illegal I feel like that's a law nobody ever follows or cares about (and I do mean "nobody")

Some people do follow it... but the vast majority don't.

I reserve the right to tip, fairly or unfairly, whomever, whenever, and wherever I please.

And you are perfectly free to do so. But they are supposed to report it. I say supposed to because I know that even wait staff don't necessarily report what they earn... but how is the state going to track something like that?

[Pagan]

and i cant stand mexican pastrys,

I don't know what part of the country you live in, but you've obviously never had a biscocho! http://www.texasrollingpins.com/biscochos.html

[Shangri-laschild]

Me: 5'11", ~150lbs, brown hair, blue eyes, dressed in a knee-length pea coat and armed with a hidden kubaton.

Totally somehow spaced out and read that as katana and was somewhat confused till the end :-D

Haven't had to really deal with any violence lately but I used to have people get in my face all the time when I worked at the gas station, which, as a small female working by myself can be unnerving.

[MMATM]

Difference there is that servers report tips. If anyone is being tipped, and they are not reporting it, it's illegal income. Nobody thinks that the people who use those tip jars make much money, but sometimes they make a good amount per shift... like upwards of $20 per person on a slow night.
<snip>
A dollar off the street is not classified as income, I don't think, since you didn't work for it. Tips are worked for, and are therefore supposed to be taxed on.
<snip>
But they are supposed to report it. I say supposed to because I know that even wait staff don't necessarily report what they earn... but how is the state going to track something like that?

I said that servers report tips. Usually they're taxed regardless of whether they make tips anyway, as 10% of their sales are declared as part of their salary (or some similar system). Other places tax whatever the server reports as having been tipped, in which case it would be possible to cheat the system by reporting less than what one had actually received.

A dollar off the street is equivalent, legally, to a voluntary "jar" tip (not to be confused with a waitstaff tip, which is what I mentioned in the above paragraph). Someone leaving a dollar in a conspicuous jar at your place of work, without being told or asked to by you, and your subsequent retrieval of said dollar, while it is understood by the person leaving it that you would pick it up later, is no different than someone putting a dollar on the ground (or dropping it) and your picking it up later.

And yes, having worked the food service industry behind a counter, I know very well just how much a tip jar can account for, especially if there are only one or two employees on shift, or if someone places a very large and complex order (and isn't a douchetard), or if someone is especially charitable.

Any money left in tip jars is technically not worked for, as the employee is making minimum wage already and is not asking for tips, and is instead a donation by the public to the employees, much the same as putting money in a guitar case near someone who is playing on the street. While it may be illegal in some places, I've never heard of anyone (except possibly yourself) deliberately not tipping at places like that (or to street musicians) for legal reasons.