A little more fiber maybe?

[BarbieGirl]

This happened a few years ago when my husband was over the plumbing and electrical departments.
A rather large gentleman comes in to buy a toilette, it seems his has cracked, at the base.

So he buys a cheap one, comes back and returns it because it has cracked at the base where you bolt it to the floor. Slightly odd but they refund it because it is the cheapest they sell.

Comes back within a week this one which is a mid line has done the same thing..... uhhhhhhh starting to get really odd. Toilettes don't usually crack that low when they break.

They think maybe another fluke. Returns it and then buys a top of the line kohler something or other.

Few days later, back AGAIN! They know it can't be the toilette but he's upset and so they agree to do one last exchange for him. And he has them do an install.

Well My husband goes out to make sure it all goes well. In talking with the guy they find out the problem...
The guy as he puts it, has to go a certain way.... he has to grab on the base of the toilette and rock side to side multiple times to be able to go. He had to use A LOT of force to be able to crack the toilette the way he did.

To fix the toilette they installed Re bar reinforcements in the floor and used plumbers tape(which is actually metal) to strap it to the floor.

Overall not exactly sucky, but I do think that returning something you broke and claiming it was defective is kinda sucky.

[XCashier]

The guy as he puts it, has to go a certain way.... he has to grab on the base of the toilette and rock side to side multiple times to be able to go. He had to use A LOT of force to be able to crack the toilette the way he did.

And he sees nothing wrong with this?! Dude, you don't need a new toilet, you need a DOCTOR!

[Becks]

That's just disturbing.

[Bright_Star]

I think he needs to eat a couple of boxes of Life cereal & he'll be shittin' bricks in no time flat & he won't have to do the "grab-the-toilet-bowl-with-all-your-might-and-push-yourself-so-hard-that-you-break-the-toilet-and-squeeze-out-mini-loaf-or-two" poopoo dance...lol.
Either that or go to the proctologist.

[MoxisPilot]

...You shouldn't have to strain on the john. Time to look in to either less FiberOne or more spinach.

[Ghengis51]

I think he needs to eat a couple of boxes of Life cereal & he'll be shittin' bricks in no time flat & he won't have to do the "grab-the-toilet-bowl-with-all-your-might-and-push-yourself-so-hard-that-you-break-the-toilet-and-squeeze-out-mini-loaf-or-two" poopoo dance...lol.
Either that or go to the proctologist.

That was SO not what I wanted to be reading at 6am That'll teach me to check the forums right before breakfast.

[iradney]

Prunes. Or dried apricots. That'll get the works flowing. Apricot chicken is awesome for when...er...things are backed up

[blas]

Metamucil baby! It's not just for seniors anymore!

Besides, pushing too hard causes hemmrhoids.

[SteeleDragon78]

sounds like he might be in need of an enema first and then perhaps a couple gallons of Castor oil. makes me wonder just how much cheese he was eating. :uts on his cheese police hat:: STEP AWAY FROM THE CHEDDAR! PUT THE GOUDA DOWN! ::takes off hat and runs for the hills::

[drunkenwildmage]

This guy doesn't need a Toilet, he needs Shop Vac.






damn..

[trunks2k]

Wouldn't increasing his fiber make it harder for him to go? He needs a stool softener.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Screw stool softener, he probably needs an entire box full of chocolate laxatives and a couple enemas.

At least.

He also must be quite the growler and shouter while on the pot.

[SteeleDragon78]

actually it depends on the fiber he is eating, insoluble fiber is a stool softener as well as bulk, so i would say 3 or 4 bran muffins would do the job, however if he took laxities it would be a brutal push, i think the coupling of a mineral oil enema and a major dose of fiber would have him dedicating like the rest of us

[blas]

A moaner and a screamer on the toilet? Oh gosh......can you picture if his wife had company over for dinner and he had to use the toilet?

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! SON OF A BITCH! OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" *commence cracking the sides of the toilet*

"Oh, that's just my husband. He gets really worked up when he reads the Business section of the newspaper."

[Bradester]

I actually strained a muscle in my neck doing the Toilet Twister when I was four years old.
Thank god for that nasty fiber stuff I had to put in my orange juice.