"Can I borrow a fag?"

[Lace Neil Singer]

I went shopping yesterday. Not to spend oodles of money, of course, just to trawl the charity shops in search of a warm jumper and to buy some books, also from charity shops. I love bargain hunting. Anyway, during one of the points where I stopped in the street to light up a cigarette, this chavette girl came up to me.

"Can I borrow a fag?" she drawled. I've never really understood the point of this question; firstly, just how can you borrow a cigarette? Do you smoke it and then hand the filter back? Second, why the hell should a complete stranger give you one of their precious smokes? I never do; my smokes are for me, and on occasion, my friends (who always pay me back in kind) so I told the girl no. She immediately gave me stinkeye and muttered "Selfish bitch," as she walked off. XD


Note for Americans: In England, the word "fag" is slang for a cigarette. Just so you don't immediately jump to the wrong conclusion.

[MoxisPilot]

Yep, you're selfish because you're choosing not to share your EXTREMELY expensive (and I assumed they're more expensive in the UK than they are in the States) luxury with someone who a.) you don't know and b.) has no problem bumming from people so she doesn't have to spend her own money.

I'm not terribly comfortable with strangers bumming cigarettes...It's like going up to someone and asking to borrow their soda, or to loan you five bucks. Yeeeesh.

[candyshopgirl]

Yes its so selfish to not want to give your property away that you've worked so hard for. I'm sure there are people out there that never have bought their own "fags" the whole time they have smoked they just bummed. I have no problem giving people a quater once in a while but there has to be a stopping point.

[Yfandes]

Wow - last I heard cigs were about 5 GBP a pack - or a little over 9 USD
No way would I "loan" 45 cents to every to every EW who asked.

[DevilBoy]

When I am asked the question, "Can I borrow a cigarette?" I always reply immediately with, "Well, I was planning on smoking it eventually...how long would you like to borrow it? "

This does one of two things:

1. Confuses the hell out of the person and they walk away scratching their head
2. The person then changes the question to, "Can I bum/have a cigarette?"

If the second option ensues I simply tell them, "no".

[Emrld]

When I did smoke - (not being able to breathe ER visit with extended stay and then surgery makes it real easy to quit)
I had a few friends that smoked - amongst us we would "borrow" from each other.
As in walking out of a store to the car and realize that you had already smoked your last one . . .so friend gives you one and you head to the convience store to buy another pack. (Then later when it happens to them you pass them a smoke)
Or your out at a bar and thought you had a second pack and oops it is still at home on the counter. . . so your friend shares their pack with you cause the bar is $2-3 more a pack.
Again this is with people you know and smoke around regularly.
In Lace Neil Singer situation it was a total stranger - my reply was always "Sure for $1.00 . . .and then I will even let you smoke it"

[smileyeagle1021]

Note for Americans: In England, the word "fag" is slang for a cigarette. Just so you don't immediately jump to the wrong conclusion.

too late brain went in the gutter the moment I saw the title

though actually I figured that's what you meant, I used to watch way too much British television.

Those people bother me as much as the people who will come up to me at the hotel and ask to "borrow" a map... at check out time... I know there is no way in hell they are ever going to return the map, so I give them one of our freebies, and then they complain it's not a high enough quality... fine, it's free, don't like it, don't take it.

[Sparky]

I've never had this problem since I've never smoked, but I've always been tickled by "Can I borrow a Kleenex?"

Borrow? No. You can HAVE a Kleenex. You can keep it. Really. I do not want it back!

[Evil Queen]

If I want to borrow a Fag, I'll borrow Sheldon. (Thank you BBC America)

No, you can HAVE a cigarette. You can HAVE a couple asprin. I don't want any of that stuff back!

Except maybe Sheldon. I'd like him back.

[Miyon]

In college I had a friend that decided he wasnt going to buy cigarettes anymore. He would just ask us all for one.
My group of friends got sick of it after about 2 weeks so we all agreed to say no.

So this guy would raid our ashtrays and take the tobacco from all our old butts and sprinkle the tobacco into rolling papers and made he own.

He was a cheap bastard. But at least he stopped asking us.

[mariamousie1]

Thank you for that postscript. I knew what you meant, but it sounds kind of funny out of context. "Can I borrow a homosexual?" "Here you go, but I need him, so bring him right back!"

[Sheldonrs]

If I want to borrow a Fag, I'll borrow Sheldon. (Thank you BBC America)

Just make sure you return me in the same condition you found me. :-)

[simpleyme]

I quit smoking 15 years ago and one of the many benefits is being able to tell cig bummers no I don't smoke


i work in a little convenience store, our cigarettes are expensive yes i know people tell me that all the time, there is nothing I can do about especially since the store only make 15 cents of each pack , of course I reckon we should do as customers suggest and by them online and try not to pay the tax so we can sell them cheaper that is a great plan ,idiots

but the best SC I have had with cigarettes and god have i had a lot is the guy who proclaimed our cigarettes were a rip off and I should go get fu**ed and all sorts of other nice words, then after his tirade was over he asked me if he could bum a cig off of me:eek
: what an ass he had the money he just was going to buy them somewhere else which is great but what an ass asking a hourly employee to fund your habit because your to cheap to cough up a dime

[Broomjockey]

Just make sure you return me in the same condition you found me. :-)

I was gonna say "why pick on Sheldon," but he seems okay with it

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Time to retell the story of the crazy, probably homeless lady who smokes all the discarded butts in the ashtray outside the store.

So we were outside for our first break of the day, the supervisor was smoking her cigarette and cigarette lady came by, wearing a warm jacket and big fuzzy boots in 75 degree or so weather:

CL asked sup "Do you smoke?" Sup told her she only brought down one cigarette and she was smoking it.

CL said "You're rude" and strolled through the open front door. Mind you, the store was still closed at this time.

Sup told her the store was closed and she couldn't go inside. "Bitch!" CL spat and stomped off.

Last week I went to dinner with my parents for my birthday and I saw CL walking down the street, still in that heavy jacket and boots. I pointed her out. My mom thought she was a hooker. I can't imagine anybody paying her for sex, but then again there's always someone as horny as one is ugly.