Piercing or spanking? (get your mind out of the gutter)

[Zombi]

I'm sorry if I offended, it wasn't intentional. I dislike tongue rings for multiple reasons (dental damage, and higher risk of heart valve infections that have been linked to them, etc.).
Mostly I'm flabergasted at this woman, this is just but one incident in a long line of things where she treats her daughters more like friends than her children, and then wonders why they act up so badly.

While the risk of dental damage is increased (vs. not having one at all), it's not a serious issue unless you play with it a lot, clicking it against your teeth. Also, the acrylic balls reduce the risk of damage, as opposed to the metal ones.

I'm another that just has a tongue stud - while I would love an opportunity to use it for sexual purposes, that's not why I got it.

[RavenStarr]

My son's friend got a homemade tattoo when he was 14. This was done without his parent's permission. His mom especially hit the roof on this one. She hates tattoos. She has said if she ever wants a tattoo, she'll just take some magic marker and draw something on here arms.

Right now my oldest has said that he might get a tattoo when he is old enough. My middle son has said he is definitely getting at least 2. He says he already knows what he wants. I told them that if they wanted to get one when they turn 18 that was fine. However I told them that if they would wait until they are 21, then I would pay for their first tattoo. That's if they still want one.

[Barefootgirl]

I have to agree with Spiffy and Sofar. I think the kind of parent who takes their underage child for a tattoo or body-piercing, is the kind who is afraid to say no, wants to be their kid's "friend" rather than their parent and thinks that by doing to they are somehow a cool parent. Um, no. You're not a cool parent. You're a pain and you're doing your child a deep disservice.

Kids need boundaries of all kinds. They like to know that there IS a fence there for them to lean on, even while they are mouthing off about how oppressive the fences are and how awful you are for putting up fences, and it spoils the view and no other kid in their class has fences, yadda, yadda, yadda, God save us all from teenage angst. The only kids who have no boundaries at all are kids whose parents don't give a monkey's whether they live or die. Look at the number of runaways who are never reported missing. The parent doesn't even care enough to tell someone that something bad might have happened to their child - is it any wonder the kid runs away?

OK< that's a bit over-dramatic, but i still wouldn't let my child get either a tattoo or a body-piercing. Partly because I personally think they are ugly (no, I do not think that makes you ugly. No, i don't condemn people with tats and piercings. I jsut don't care for them myself. Remember freedom of expression? This is mine) and I think they are something for adults. If my daughter wants to go and get a tattoo when she is 18 and goes off to university, thats fine. If she's waited for it and wanted it that long, then it obviously really does mean something to her and she can use her own money to pay for it because she will be an adult ! I would just hope that by that time she would have some modicum of good taste and forward thinking, and would get something tasteful and hide-able.

[kibbles]

Not every parent who lets their child get a tattoo or piercing, is trying to be a cool parent or is a parent that is afraid to say no. Yes that is true in some cases, but I'm sure there are cases where a parent lets their underage teen get one, simply because they don't have a problem with it. And that doesn't mean that that child doesn't have many boundaries and is not cared for IMO

Kibbles

[Hempress]

I think in my post in this thread I already explained why I would let my child get a tattoo or body piercing. And it has nothing to do with being a "cool parent". For one, I certainly wouldn't pay for my child's body art (he'll have to get a job if he wants it), and I certainly wouldn't let him get just anything (a Prince Albert comes to mind; nope, that ain't happening) but I'm not going to just say no for the sake of someone else's idea of boundaries.

I'm sure some would think me an irresponsible parent, but whatever. Do I really care? No.

[Zombi]

Most reputable piercers would absolutely refuse to do a PA, or any other below-the-belt work on anyone under 18 anyway. And I agree with paying for it themselves - my parents paid for 2 of my 3 sets of lobe piercings, and the cartilage piercing in my upper ear, but all the rest have been paid for out of my own money. And that's how I like it. Most places in Australia say you have to be over 16 to be pierced without parental permission, and I think that's a good thing, because I think that you need to stop growing before you get certain piercings. Ears are usually OK (I've had my ears pierced since age 4), but for things in and around your mouth, you should probably wait until your teeth get themselves sorted. Also, nipples need to fully develop before they can be pierced without migration or other side effects.
I got my tongue pierced as my 19th birthday present to myself, so I was well above the age limit, but my 15 year old cousin also has his tongue pierced. Why? Because his mother can't say no to him. He wanted a piercing, and she wouldn't let him get anything else done because "He's a boy! He'll get into fights and it'll get ripped out!" (this kid's too chickenshit to get into a fight, but that's beside the point). I wanted my nose pierced when I was 14, and my parents said "Hell no!" In the end, I was 17, and while I don't regret getting it done for a second, I'm glad I waited a while.

My parents detest my piercings, though - when I got my labret done, my dad made a big thing about "You're going on a plane soon! What if you walk through the metal detector and explode from all that metal?!" They're not magnetic, Dad. Anyway, thread hijacked! *gives it back*

[powerboy]

I am going to get a few tattoo's. And that is it

[technical.angel]

Ears are usually OK (I've had my ears pierced since age 4), but for things in and around your mouth, you should probably wait until your teeth get themselves sorted.

No age limit for safety of lobe piercing (although for someone to do it, the baby need to have it's first round of shots), but there is an age limit of 12-14 for cartlidge piercing in the ears. Let the cartlidge get happy before you start punching holes in it.

Jenni, the with shattered cartlidge, who misses doing ear piercings.

[Barefootgirl]

Not every parent who lets their child get a tattoo or piercing, is trying to be a cool parent or is a parent that is afraid to say no. Yes that is true in some cases, but I'm sure there are cases where a parent lets their underage teen get one, simply because they don't have a problem with it.

So that parent is essentially saying to the child, "I'm going to help you break the law, because I think its a stupid law, and i feel that you expressing yourself is more important than the law". Sorry, but I can't rate that parent as anything other than misguided, and frankly, making a rod for their own back. If you condone your kid flouting the law on this issue, you lose the moral high ground on everything else.

Why is it such a big deal to say to a kid, "No, you can't have a tattoo now, wait until you're an adult, and then you can do it yourself". Things that are truly worthwhile are worth waiting for. Teaching a child instant gratification is not doing that child any favours at all.

[Zombi]

It's not against the law for them to have it done with parental permission - it's against the law for a piercer to work on someone who is underage without parental consent.

[Rapscallion]

Somehow, I've got a mental image of a five-year-old wanting and getting a tattoo of the latest child's cartoon character.

"I wanna Spongbob tat, mom!"

Give it a decade from then, and...

Rapscallion

[kibbles]

So that parent is essentially saying to the child, "I'm going to help you break the law, because I think its a stupid law, and i feel that you expressing yourself is more important than the law". Sorry, but I can't rate that parent as anything other than misguided, and frankly, making a rod for their own back. If you condone your kid flouting the law on this issue, you lose the moral high ground on everything else.

Sorry but I don't think you are losing high moral ground just because of a tattoo or a piercing. If a parent is doing it just to be the "cool" parent, then yes they will lose control because more than likely they are trying to be the cool parent in other areas as well.

But a parent who genuinely has no problem with a tattoo or a piercing, is not going to lose control over their children, and as was stated, it's against the law for it to be done without parental consent, it's not illegal if parental consent is given.

Just as with watching all different shows/movies, if a parent knows a child is able to handle it, then there is no problem IMO.

Kibbles