That's right, laugh at me. Ass!!

[Andara Bledin]

What Sableonblonde said.

I don't give a rat's ass what some random asshole thinks of my appearance. Assholes will make asshole comments no matter what I looked like, and if I was a perfect 10, they'd just make different asshole comments.

^-.-^

[Food Lady]

When I was about nineteen years old, I went out for a walk one evening around my town.... Well as I was walking I passed a bus stop where these two girls, approximately my age, were standing. As I passed I heard one say to the other in a nasty voice, "I bet she thinks she looks so good in those jeans." For some reason that comment horrified the hell out of me, and stuck with me...even though I was a size 5

Oftentimes, insults have nothing to do with truth. At a size 13 in jr. high (which, for my large frame actually is pretty thin), kids were calling me big-butt. Now that I've grown up and observed the many shapes & sizes of people, I realize I've never had a butt. I would love some more junk in my trunk. I guess those brats used the stock insult, as they weren't bright enough to come up w/ anything else. It's a common affliction, as evidenced by the fact that most men will either call a woman "fat" or "bitch" or both. Just no creativity there.

[chainedbarista]

lupo, i'm proud of what you're doing and am glad it's making a difference. ignore those who are too ignorant/foolish/insensitive/stupid to be supportive of what you do; they're suffering in their own way (or will, those types are karma victims in the making).

i wish i had some of your drive; i've gotten heavy since leaving the service (but i've also been lazy, so i have myself to blame, not anyone/thing else) and need to do something about it.

i say, "ride on, momma, ride on!"

[Astrokitty]

Lupo, you ROCK! Hang in there, hun. You're doing great!

Sounds like the same invertebrates who passed me in their jacked-up penis extention with no muffler. I was jogging on a road through our apartment complex, in the evening, when out of nowhere I hear:

"RUN FATTY WHORE RUN" followed by various hoots and other calls.

Unfortunately, I have this little problem that loud unexpected noises take my brain back to a wonderful time when I was dodging automatic gunfire.

I kissed the pavement hard. Alas, I didn't get up in time to get their plate number.

[Munkie]

I'm a size 16-18 myself (my size depends on teh store i shop at ). Through high school, i had a friend who was almost 6' and mega-skinny. We called her Spaghetti - we all agreed on nicknames, so it wasn't like we did it to insult each other - and I was probably 130lbs at most. Compared to my size now, I was skinny then.

I also have what many of my female friends (and some male) call a "black woman's butt" in that I have a lot of junk in my trunk. LOL it makes pants shopping a little difficult, as i have a TINY waist!! I've been trying to lose weight for a long time, and I have lost a couple pounds recently. My work requires me to move around a lot, push/lug heavy items, lift a lot, etc... I got a good workout today, even had a bit of cardio thrown in. I love our receiving days - always lots to do!

I also have a friend who is roughly 300lbs ish, and it's not by choice. The insulin and other medication she is on is making her gain weight, and her doctors are insisting she needs to lose weight, but she can't get the exercise because of other existing medical issues (she was in a car accident a little over a year ago).

Lupo, keep it up. I know what its like - if from a different view - to have people trying to step on you. It's all jealousy at the fact that you are a BEAUTIFUL and CONFIDENT woman!!

Confidence in a person always brings out the insecurities in others, making them say and do anything to bring the confident ones down to their level. It's (in)human nature to make oneself the "better" choice.

ok, I'm shutting up, I'm not really making much sense and I may have offended someone. Sorry if i did.

[Andara Bledin]

LOL it makes pants shopping a little difficult, as i have a TINY waist!! I've been trying to lose weight for a long time, and I have lost a couple pounds recently.

I'm a size 15/16, too, with a big butt and small-ish waist. I find that low-rise jeans in a size that fits are really super comfortable. And junior sizes (odd numbers) will fit better than misses sizes (even numbers). Juniors have more butt room and less gut room, and misses are flatter in back, and have a more space for a belly.

^-.-^

[Keiara]

Yay fellow Seattlites

If that comment was directed at you, there is a slight chance it wasn't, then that family is full of assholes.

Lupo keep doing what you're doing. Set small goals for yourself and if you're craving a certain type of food eat it, but in a smaller portion. I'm on the 14+ side too. But I have no ass so pants shopping is fun.

And if you lived in the Seattle area I'd say let's go work out together

[chainedbarista]

same here; 'baby's got back' is a pretty accurate description of me, little in the middle but got much BACK.

go go ghetty booties!

[Seshat]

I also have a friend who is roughly 300lbs ish, and it's not by choice. The insulin and other medication she is on is making her gain weight, and her doctors are insisting she needs to lose weight, but she can't get the exercise because of other existing medical issues (she was in a car accident a little over a year ago).

I was recently in a pain management program, and under the assistance of physiotherapists, lost 5cm around the waist in a month.

And they taught me methods of exercise that work despite my disabilities.

Get your friend to demand assistance with exercise from her doctor. A referral to a physiotherapist skilled in handling her medical issues should do it. Additionally, an endocrinologist for the insulin and other medications problems, and a dietician - preferably one willing to work with cultural preferences for food.

I think most of you know my opinions re fat & exercise.

1. Check for medical (including psych) issues that contribute to overeating, metabolic problems that affect digestion and/or fat creation and/or fat use, exercise issues.
And yes, I mean even issues as 'minor' as "I always get blisters" or "I get sweat rash". Treat those, and you'll be a lot more willing to exercise. It might even become fun!

2. Go into it with a goal of getting your body healthy, not fitting some cultural expectation.
For fat, aim to have enough fat to have proper padding on palms of hand, soles of feet, and enough insulation to not chill in a normal pool; and not to have so much fat it interferes with metabolism, or puts weight-strain on muscles and joints.
Anywhere between those two is fine.


And after my own bouts with physios, I have new ideas about body shape and stuff!


3. Build your body up so you can do everything that's important to you, easily. So you can do your shopping and haul your groceries inside with little or no effort. So you can carry your grandchild. So you can fly kites or throw frisbees. Or do your shift at work without coming home aching.

Decide whether 'twitch' or 'sustain' muscle is going to help you in your daily life more. For most of us, it will be sustain: all our postural work is sustain, and so are repetitive tasks like stocking an aisle. But if you need to be able to lift very heavy weights but only a few times, 'twitch' is more important to you.

If you want 'twitch', aim to be able to do multiple sets of high resistance and low repetitions. In gym work, heavy weights in 2 or 3 sets of 5 to 8 reps.
If you want 'sustain', aim to be able to do one set of low resistance and many repetitions. In gym work, whatever weights are light enough for you to do sets of 15 to 30 reps.


4. For cardio, aim for the same. Get your heart and lungs strong enough that you can run for a bus (presuming no disability) without exhausting yourself.



Do try to ignore the idiots. There are a very few people who have the right to say anything about your body shape. You, your doctor (IF he/she is doing it sensibly), your physiotherapist (again, for medical reasons), and your endocrinologist (visceral fat produces hormones of its own - your endo needs to know).

It's horrible that we 'oversized' people have such problems with being seen in public. It's horrible that people who have no right to comment decide they can.

But try to counter those people with people like .. well, everyone in this thread. Remember that WE are proud of you. And of each other.

[Sparky]

Just have to insert a short plug for Curves. There are other "ladies only" exercise clubs around, and some are rip-offs and some are not, but I've found I like the Curves program better than most. YMMV, but I found the local club very welcoming for all ages and all fitness levels. It's also inexpensive.

My point is, if exercising outside is too intimidating because lowlifes yell rude things, find a friendly indoor facility. Whatever it takes.

Of course if you prefer running or biking, go for it!

[Seshat]

I'd forgotten something.

Start wherever you can, without strain. It doesn't matter if you start doing a single rep with no resistance, or running for five steps, or throwing a frisbee once.

Do it two or three times a week.

No less than once a week, preferably twice a week, add 20%. Or 10%. Or 5%. More reps, or add a weight and drop back the reps count.

If you're having a bad day (and my physiotherapists were saying this to people with chronic pain problems), drop the amount you do by 20% but do it anyway.
If you're having a REALLY bad day, just do as much as you can. Go back to one rep with no resistance if you have to.

And then pick up where you left off, as close to the level you were at before your bad day/s as possible.

If you're basically healthy, you should feel a mild ache the day after exercise, but nothing you can't comfortably live with. This ache is the feeling of your body adding new muscle.
If you feel more than that, drop back 20% - you started too high, or added weights/reps too soon.

Once you reach a point where you can do all your physical goals without strain, you can stop adding reps and/or weights. And at that point, even that ache should go away. Doing your exercises should feel trivial, maybe even boring. Certainly not painful.


If your exercise is painful, beyond the 'adding new muscle' ache, then something is wrong. Find out what.

That's the advice from my physios, filtered through my understanding.

And trust me, knowing THAT makes it a LOT easier to commit to doing, and maintaining exercise! Mind you, with my body it does hurt, and will hurt, beyond the 'new muscle' ache. But meh. I'm stuck with a lemon. Wish I could do an exchange for a properly functioning body.

[Heatherina]

Wow. I've seen from some of your other posts that this seems to happen kind of often. I haven't really had that sort of nonsense happen to me since early high school, and I think I've only gotten bigger. That's why I don't go for walks and whatnot in the great outdoors, my fear is that exactly and I'm pretty easily wounded by such comments. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Srsly WTF.

[Seshat]

I can lose fat/gain muscle with exercises done in my own home, using two dumbbells, a child's ball, and the stairs.

The ball is held between my knees doing squats.
The stairs are for stepups.
The dumbbells are to add resistance to everything else.

I do also walk the dog. It's good to have an enthusiastic physiotherapy partner!

[Der Cute]

Heatherina, you have got to put some mental armor on. It's not easy, I'm not exactly Miss Universe, but I don't take BS from people.

If you want to go out, do it. Go out for a walk and enjoy yourself. Put earbuds on and ignore the humans. You have a right to breathe air and get sunshine and wiggle your toes in the grass, just as much as Skinny Chick does. Remind yourself: you're here to be yourself, not to take comments and pay attention to them. Yes they hurt. Yes those people are mean - but you can't control them - you can only control your reaction to the meanies.

Flip em the bird, and when they gasp, say, "I'm efficient, I only use one muscle to do this."

And get outside before it gets too cold/ icky! Right now is my fave time of year, cool in morning/evenings and warm in the day. Sunny !!

Cutenoob

[AccountingDrone]

Wow. I've seen from some of your other posts that this seems to happen kind of often. I haven't really had that sort of nonsense happen to me since early high school, and I think I've only gotten bigger. That's why I don't go for walks and whatnot in the great outdoors, my fear is that exactly and I'm pretty easily wounded by such comments. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Srsly WTF.

meh, when I lived in Norfolk VA, I lived a block off the beach on 13th Bay st ...

I was 5'7" tall, weighed 135 lbs and was working a job where I walked constant rounds in a bank operations center, about 5 miles a night. I will say that I was in excellent condition, but being female, I have *curves*, specifically the lower tummy, hips and ass, and once I hit puberty I had c cup boobs. Very specifically, 36-24-38, which back in the 50s was considered pretty optimum.

I had a guy tell me I was *fat*. He had a beer gut that made him look like he was about a year pregnant, but *I* was fat and shouldn't be wearing a one piece bathing suite on a public beach ... I have no idea about these jerks other than they have to have such a dismal view of themselves that they will say ANYTHING to make themselves feel better. Ignore them, you are the one out there trying to improve. Fat can be lost, stupid can't!

[I will say that as an adult I have been under 100 lbs exactly ONCE since I hit puberty ... of course I had just almost died and was lined up for 6 months of dialysis. I dropped from 145 to 96 in 2 weeks from a combination of my fetus dying and triggering toxemia in me that thrashed my kidneys. One of my fathers ww2 buddies commented I looked like one of the people he liberated from Bergen-Belsen. I can't recommend toxemia as a diet plan...]