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that happened to cross my path yesterday:
So, you managed to become parents lately. Congratulations. It truly is a heartwarming sight to witness the proud father, carrying his infant, do a spinning dance, complete with hopping up and down, shouting whee-like sounds. Your child seemed to enjoy this motion tremendously. However, might I advise you that there are better places to do this, as opposed to the driving lane in the local parkade, when there are cars approaching?
Dear mother of said infant, your instincts of protecting your offspring are commendable. I admit, it was the first time I saw someone literally leaping into the path of my car, arms stretched wide in a 'stop!' gesture, when I dared to approach your happily dancing husband, coming closer than some 10 meters, at a crawling speed. Of course, dancing out of the driveway was a no-no for the happy father.
After this... small incident, you happened to enter the mall post office before me. So, quite naturally, as there was only one line, it was your turn to be served before me. So far, so good. Yes, your little child is cute. Yes, she's adorable. Yes, you have proudly shown her to both of the staff, all customers in the vicinity, and to one another. Yes, she seems to absolutely love it when you both coo at her, kissing her on the head for minutes on. Umm... might I suggest you do what you came for, and actually state your business to the person at the counter?
Ah, you want to open a banking account, for both of you (yes, there is a Post-Bank in my country). Hmm, maybe it's just me, but I somehow question the wisdom of starting said process (which usually takes about 15 minutes) when it's some five minutes to closing time (well, it was some 10 minutes to closing time when you entered)...
Yes your daughter is cute. Is it too much to expect that you actually both listen to the contract details clerk is explaining, or is your coo-and-kiss-instinct so pronounced that one of you has to do this constantly, forcing the girl at the counter to explain things twice, once to each of you?
Yes, your daughter is adorable. May I suggest you listen to what the clerk says, and not turn away in mid-sentence to coo at your child once more, only to request that the clerk 'explains that thing once again, since you were distracted'?
As a matter of fact, you need an ID to open an account. Yes, dear young mother, this applies to you as well. No, your husband's ID alone will not suffice if both of you want to get access to that account. No, he cannot vouch for you, stating that 'he knows you' (kissing both you and your daughter in the process), 'so it should be fine'. No ID, no cookies. Period. Yes, your child is adorable. No, that won't help in the current situation. Oh, look; you found an ID card stating your maiden name, let's use this. Yes, your child is cute. No, shoving her in the face of the clerk who is frantically typing on her computer is not going to speed things up.
Finally, if someone (the women behind me) asks you to 'speed things up' when you deem cooing at your beloved child once again being more pressing business than signing the f#?king contract, throwing a temper tantrum will not endear you to anyone. The fact that your child (which in fact, has been adorable and friendly up to now) has started to cry has little to do with 'us all being f#?king child haters'; it rather stems from your voice just rising several octaves, now vaguely resembling the sound of a siren (the air raid type, not the mythological one).
So, you managed to become parents lately. Congratulations. It truly is a heartwarming sight to witness the proud father, carrying his infant, do a spinning dance, complete with hopping up and down, shouting whee-like sounds. Your child seemed to enjoy this motion tremendously. However, might I advise you that there are better places to do this, as opposed to the driving lane in the local parkade, when there are cars approaching?
Dear mother of said infant, your instincts of protecting your offspring are commendable. I admit, it was the first time I saw someone literally leaping into the path of my car, arms stretched wide in a 'stop!' gesture, when I dared to approach your happily dancing husband, coming closer than some 10 meters, at a crawling speed. Of course, dancing out of the driveway was a no-no for the happy father.
After this... small incident, you happened to enter the mall post office before me. So, quite naturally, as there was only one line, it was your turn to be served before me. So far, so good. Yes, your little child is cute. Yes, she's adorable. Yes, you have proudly shown her to both of the staff, all customers in the vicinity, and to one another. Yes, she seems to absolutely love it when you both coo at her, kissing her on the head for minutes on. Umm... might I suggest you do what you came for, and actually state your business to the person at the counter?
Ah, you want to open a banking account, for both of you (yes, there is a Post-Bank in my country). Hmm, maybe it's just me, but I somehow question the wisdom of starting said process (which usually takes about 15 minutes) when it's some five minutes to closing time (well, it was some 10 minutes to closing time when you entered)...
Yes your daughter is cute. Is it too much to expect that you actually both listen to the contract details clerk is explaining, or is your coo-and-kiss-instinct so pronounced that one of you has to do this constantly, forcing the girl at the counter to explain things twice, once to each of you?
Yes, your daughter is adorable. May I suggest you listen to what the clerk says, and not turn away in mid-sentence to coo at your child once more, only to request that the clerk 'explains that thing once again, since you were distracted'?
As a matter of fact, you need an ID to open an account. Yes, dear young mother, this applies to you as well. No, your husband's ID alone will not suffice if both of you want to get access to that account. No, he cannot vouch for you, stating that 'he knows you' (kissing both you and your daughter in the process), 'so it should be fine'. No ID, no cookies. Period. Yes, your child is adorable. No, that won't help in the current situation. Oh, look; you found an ID card stating your maiden name, let's use this. Yes, your child is cute. No, shoving her in the face of the clerk who is frantically typing on her computer is not going to speed things up.
Finally, if someone (the women behind me) asks you to 'speed things up' when you deem cooing at your beloved child once again being more pressing business than signing the f#?king contract, throwing a temper tantrum will not endear you to anyone. The fact that your child (which in fact, has been adorable and friendly up to now) has started to cry has little to do with 'us all being f#?king child haters'; it rather stems from your voice just rising several octaves, now vaguely resembling the sound of a siren (the air raid type, not the mythological one).
) but I have other things to do in my life than fuss over him. I fuss over his plenty, but at home where other people are not waiting on me. 
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