Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is!

[Rantsylvania 6-5000]

This title rocks! I'll be borrowing it too!

[Exaspera]

No excuse for endangering other people.

Agreed. Was just putting forth a theory.

[Jay 2K Winger]

The guy is probably taking his hostilities out on the bike due to dealing with SCs in the store all day?

No excuse for endangering other people.

[Exaspera]

The guy is probably taking his hostilities out on the bike due to dealing with SCs in the store all day?

[KitterCat]

He reminds me of 2 speed bikers that tailgated me 3 years ago. Was going home really late and had to slow down to 25mph going through a town. I had to come to a complete stop due to spotting 2 skunks who I’m pretty sure were in the process of making little skunks. The asses who not 5 seconds ago were riding my ass and trying to figure out why I’d stopped see 2 black and whites suddenly running past them. After that they gave me a good distance between our vehicles. Now I just need to figure out how to replicate this on command.

[superhotelworker]

Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is!

God, I need to put plastic on my keyboard before reading one of your stories Jay. twice now, nearly had to buy myself a new one :P

And We have one of those at the hotel. When we had a collage baseball team outside in the empty lot beside us, playing a friendly game, they 'accidently' nailed the dipshit with a baseball, direct peg to his head. I Still say the pitchers aim was SPOT on.

[EvilEmpryss]

When you have a habitual offender like CRA, tell the cops. Let them know when and where he does his stunts. If you've figured out CRA's schedule then they'll be more likely to come down and sit in a nice dark cop car just down the street to catch him in his antics.

While you're at it, stop in at the other store and speak to the store manager there. I'm sure s/he (who probably works days and never sees this crappy behavior) won't be happy to learn that one of the employees is endangering customer lives.

Just be warned, the level of asshole that this guys seems to be will probably feel that he's being persecuted and that any punishment is unjustified.

[Imprl59]

CRA's less well endowed brother has moved in a couple of doors down from me. I can tell he has the shortest weineer in the family becuase he does the same stunts as yours, only in the middle of the night. Our neighborhood is a working class neighborhood with lots of kids who are (were) asleep when he decides to go on his beer run.

I'm waiting to what happens first... Will he smash the fool thing up himself or will one of the neighbors smash him up. Either way I just hope it happens soon.

Steve B.

[LillFilly]

Your story title is now my new signature!

Yay!

[IT Grunt]

I deal with a jerk like that a lot going into work. My main route is along a two lane road, with lots of twists and a speed limit of 45 MPH. This guy on a crotch rocket, presumably also going to work, is the most impatient guy on the planet. He'll rocket up behind you, and ride your ass at 2 feet or less from your bumper, waiting for you to turn into a curve. He then /passes you in the curve/, and rockets off. One of these days, I hope one of 2 things (or both!) occur: 1, he gets in an accident because of his stunts, or 2, he gets busted by the cops.

[fireheart]

Question: if certain cars are substitute penis mobiles, does that make certain motorbikes substitute crotch rockets?

[Jay 2K Winger]

By all means, feel free.

[Cloudy Sky]

Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is!

I am SOOOO borrowing this!!

[Jay 2K Winger]

Okay. Next door to the wholesale club is a Wally World. One of the guys who works there is a man I'll dub CRA, short for Crotch Rocket Asshole.

CRA, like the name I've given him implies, owns a motorcycle. Not a chopper, of course, but one of those speedy ones you see zip past you on the highway, in flagrant defiance of speed limits and public safety.

CRA's shift ends at 9pm on the days when he works, and you always know when he's gotten off work because he gets on his little crotch rocket, and proceeds to REV THAT ENGINE OF HIS AS LOUD AS IT CAN GO. Then he literally SPEEDS off down the service road in front of our store, going at top speed until he gets to the stop sign, whereupon he turns left, speeds down to the next stop sign, and then turns into traffic, and presumably has to go slower until he hits a major road, where he can open her up again.

It's annoying, dangerous, and he clearly doesn't give a shit that he's pissing people off with his "look how big my dick is" engine-revving. And it's LOUD. Tonight, Hoss and I were outside doing carts, and at least fifty feet away, and it was still WAY too loud.

Furthermore, tonight, CRA gunned it when a customer was leaving OUR store, fortunately did not hit them, but completely ignored someone who was angrily gesturing for him to "slow down." CRA not only ignored them, but popped a wheelie as he sped past.

Hoss told me he's had enough of CRA's blatant flaunting and dangerous antics. He (Hoss) works tomorrow, and if he sees CRA's crotch rocket parked outside the Wally World, he's going to take down all of CRA's data (make, model, color, tags) and place a call to the police, in the hopes of nailing the asshole when he roars out of work.