welcome to my neighborhood...

[lupo pazzesco]

I was just taking my trash out to the dumpster in my apartment complex. I'm walking back and a car pulls up alongside me. I'm kind of walking in the parking lot, so I shuffle over, thinking he wants room to turn. Nope, horn honks at me. Instead of rolling the window down, the door flies open and some...wannabe thug, for lack of a better description, leers at me.

Him: Hey, sweet cheeks!
Me: >.<
Him: What's your name sweet thang?
Me: <I shake my head and start walking faster>
Him: C'mon, you married? Cuz if you're not, we can--
Me: Yes. Yes I am. <And I turn a corner and take the long way back to my apartment>


Seriously, what kind of pheremones do I emit that attract these kind of guys? It's becoming a daily occurrence...

[Mishi]

Seriously, what kind of pheremones do I emit that attract these kind of guys? It's becoming a daily occurrence...

...Sexy ones? *ducks*

[MaggieTheCat]

Whatever they are, they must be similar to what blas has, 'cuz I remember a story very similar to this one that she told once a while back.

Makes me forever glad I never had any problems back at our old apartment complex.

[zombiequeen]

I did get this living at the in-laws, which was in a small town...best part was I knew most of the guys that did it, and I would go home and call their mother to tell them the kid was attempting to pick up prostitutes...but failed miserably. Especially if the kid had to ride the bus after that...or had to apologize for thinking I was a prostitute.

The worst part is when they do that while your husband is walking with you...they really can be that stupid...and serious

[dalesys]

Well, you were hauling trash...

[Sliceanddice]

hey i find you sex y over the internet without know what you look like.
you just radiate sexyness

[Whiskey]

hey i find you sex y over the internet without know what you look like.
you just radiate sexyness

i can get behind this statement (and lupo pazzesco)

[blas]

I don't think it's pheremones, I think it's an internal magnet for just about anything nasty, trashy, and disgusting to find you and hit on you.

My story was similar, I was going out to get the mail and some nasty fuck in a van just pulled up next to all the mailboxes and asked me out!

[MoonCat]

I get those, too...always the ones with eyes looking in two different directions, and a twitch...

Or this: Once on the train to work some kid in his 20s says to me: "Hey, Snowbunny..."

I said "Please don't call me that." He says, "oh, I'm from the Carolinas, you know it snows up here, so..."

I said "they don't teach manners in the Carolinas? Whatever happened to "excuse me, miss"?

But I suppose it beats the ones in cars that slow down and say creepy things. I mean, seriously, does that actually ever work?

[jedikuonji]

But I suppose it beats the ones in cars that slow down and say creepy things. I mean, seriously, does that actually ever work?

What!?! Are you saying all those dating tips I got from the internet were a lie?

[Amina516]

Seriously, what kind of pheremones do I emit that attract these kind of guys? It's becoming a daily occurrence...

It was the trash they were attracted to. Put a wig and make up on the outside of the bag and leave it at the curb. Watch from a window and see how many cars pull up to it.... LOL.

[bainsidhe]

Maybe they mistake that angry twitch for a seductive wink?

[dalesys]

It was the trash they were attracted to. Put a wig and make up on the outside of the bag and leave it at the curb. Watch from a window and see how many cars pull up to it.... LOL.

Pre-medicate with some powerful anti-emetics before some curb cockatrice has sex with the "bag" lady.

[lupo pazzesco]

hey i find you sex y over the internet without know what you look like.
you just radiate sexyness

i can get behind this statement (and lupo pazzesco)

o.0 Well, that's news to me! But aww, sweet! I don't think I'm sexy, just another sarcastic chubby chick with no internal filter on what I say.

What!?! Are you saying all those dating tips I got from the internet were a lie?

<Snerks> Oi vey. 2 things.

1. I laughed. A lot.
2. you actually believed something you read on the interwebz!?!?!




As for dressing up a trashbag...I read that when I went on lunch and have been giggling about it. All. Day. Long. Made work...interesting, to say the least.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

2. you actually believed something you read on the interwebz!?!?!

I read on the interwebz that if something exists, there is porn of it.

WHY MUST YOU SHATTER THESE TRUTHS I HOLD TO BE SELF-EVIDENT?!