... Not Stupid

[ralerin]

With the blind, I sometimes wonder what the most appropriate way to describe something to them is-I can't exactly say "it's red with white spots about 3 feet high and 5 feet long" can I?

If I do encounter a blind person at my store I make the attempt to introduce myself, tell them that I can guide them to where they need to be if they so choose and/or fetch the item myself if they ask. I did punch in a blind man's PIN number once because the touchscreen devices are not convinient.

[DeltaSierra]

Switch "blind" for "deaf" and that's a conversation I end up having regularly.

[Eisa]

I've used a cane on occasion [because long story short: I was born with clubfeet, had surgery as a baby, but they're getting worse...CANNOT walk or stand for long periods of time], mainly when I was a teenager. The looks I'd get were incredible. It was a very medical-looking cane, too, it's obvious it's not just some random stick of wood/metal or something.

I've also had people talk over me like I'm mentally deficient. I used to wear ankle braces [from 15-22...stopped because they were actually weakening my ankle muscles...they'd practically atrophied...my doctor didn't know what he was doing], and whenever it was possible to see my ankle braces, everyone just stared at them. I felt really upset one time in high school when I had to wear a skirt for my solo in choir--I was wearing ALL black...black top, black velvet skirt, black tights, black shoes...and my ankle braces were black. Everyone who walked past me, their eyes went RIGHT to the braces. And then looked at me like there must be something seriously wrong with me. It pissed me off.

I also had a point at chorus where my disability was being discussed with the director...and instead of her talking to me, she talked to my mom and then manipulated my body around like a puppet to show how my spine was weird and my hips were uneven. I only got out of it because I felt like I was going to pass out.

But yeah...too many people have this really annoying view of disabled people...and of course, just 'cause they ARE mentally challenged doesn't mean they're stupid, either!

[gremcint]

I find this funny because of Stephen Hawking, smartest guy out there in a wheelchair.

[ArcticChicken]

I find this funny because of Stephen Hawking, smartest guy out there in a wheelchair.

He's outright said that the reason he's so good at physics is because of being paraplegic.

[teh_blumchenkinder]

... Okay, confession time for Teh.
I live in a state that ... er... 'lacks diversity.' I don't see many people of different ethnicities or non-physically/mentally typical people on a regular basis or in numbers-- redheads make my head turn because I don't see them that often! (that an' they're almost always smokin' hot-- and all would qualify as adorable)
With people who are not physically typical-- even if they are redonkulously tall or redonkulously short (such as my roomie), it takes me a bit to 'get used to it'-- basically, stop staring. I know staring is very rude, but when you don't see something very often and you want to know more... I do my best to not stare.
People with crutches I see more often, but those are the 'I broke something' crutches, not the canes or bent crutches that some people use for mobility. (Yes I also try not to stare at anyone using a cane-- I don't see them often around here.) Crutches are no big deal-- just steer clear of the working parts so you won't get them tripped up and you're golden.
People with wheelchairs ... I'm starting to 'get the hang of' reacting to them like people with normal mobility. Yeah, they aren't typical-mobility people, but it doesn't mean anything other than both their feet are gone (or whatever else gave them wheels).
Deaf people who look like they have their lights on-- ie look like they aren't high-- are easy enough, just politely tap them on the shoulder or get in their line of sight, and have writing accoutrement handy. It's the people who don't hear me (so I think they're deaf) and look like they're stoned and don't respond to things like eye contact or waves that concern me.
Blind people, lol, I have to remember to say things or make noise, and say goodbye rather than wave. I'm not a very talky-person, and rely on body language and visual cues.
People who aren't neurologically typical, on the other hand... I've only met a few of them, and I know about problems like Down's Syndrome and Cerebral Palsy... and I'm never sure how to approach conversation.
No matter what, a person is a person. Yeah, some people can't function like others-- but not all of them look 'disabled.' (That is, most look 'completely normal.') A person with severe depression is quite possibly more disabled than a deaf person, and how the heck can you spot a person with moderate fibromyalgia? People live in society and have social rules (like "politeness" and "respect") for reasons-- like helping everyone else out. Even a completely 'able and typical' person can't do everything, and having a roof over your head and fried chicken is better than living out in the woods and eating berries and wondering if a bear is going to eat you. Some people need a little more help than others, but it doesn't mean they're useless or worth less. I'm going to stop here before I get into Fratching territory and/or spout off more of Social Contract Theory.

EDIT: Also, Eisa, I feel bad that you were treated more like a puppet than a daughter. I hope that that incident with the choir director and your mom wasn't typical...

[Magpie]

My pathfinder unit got ahold of a wheelchair and went to the mall one night, to look at how accessible the stores were. It was really interesting during my turn in the wheelchair, to notice how many people avoided looking at me. (It was the "oops, don't want to stare, look away" look, as far as I could tell). Looking back, given that I have Asperger's, it must have been pretty bad that I noticed it so strongly.

[teh_blumchenkinder]

Pathfinder unit? What's that?

[Magpie]

Girl Guides from grades 7 to 9.

[Eisa]

EDIT: Also, Eisa, I feel bad that you were treated more like a puppet than a daughter. I hope that that incident with the choir director and your mom wasn't typical...

Well, that choir director ended up sucking for a multitude of reasons, but with my mom...she had/has a BAD habit of just spouting off my personal information, especially about my disability. In the past, she has even started talking to random strangers about it. Like, I was fine if someone saw my ankle braces and asked about it [although I usually just said I had weak ankles because apparently, no one knows what clubfeet are Is that typical?], but when she just started telling people about how I had a hard time walking or standing and how messed up my feet are [my MRI scans are quite...interesting ], it really pissed me off. And I couldn't say much because she'd start yelling at me about "respecting my mother." Although now I've at least kind of put my foot down and told her not to talk about me and all my personal info. So maybe she still does it, but at least it's not right in front of me anymore.

[Captain Trips]

I use canadian crutches instead of the usual axillary crutches, you know, the funny looking ones that you associate with that crippled kid in special ed classes that also wears a helmet in case they fall over so they dont do any more brain damage... so they probably assume that im some sort of special ed type or some such nonsense. Or just the typical foggy thinking of idiots who just don't stop to think it through, there really is sort of an historical bias against visible impairments in people, the whole looks evil, is evil, looks gimp must be defective.

In my case, it's "You know, the kind my wife uses." She had polio at 17 months of age, and often needs a crutch or wheelchair to get around. Fortunately, we've rarely gotten "you are disabled so you must be retarded too" attitude. And god help anyone who does -- those crutches are made of aircraft aluminum, very tough.

[Captain Trips]

With the blind, I sometimes wonder what the most appropriate way to describe something to them is-I can't exactly say "it's red with white spots about 3 feet high and 5 feet long" can I? :

Yes, actually you can. A great number of blind people do have limited sight, and many more weren't born blind, so both groups will know what "red" is, and you don't need sight to know how long a foot is. And if someone is totally blind from birth, they will still understand that red is a color that is compatible with oranges and browns, but not blues and greens (other than holidays.) Again, they are blind and not stupid, they know what colors are, even if they've never seen them. (Uh, I just realized that what I just said can be misinterpreted as trolling or fratching. It isn't meant that way, it's just to point out that it's okay to use these descriptives.)

[Pagan]

Although now I've at least kind of put my foot down and told her not to talk about me and all my personal info.

No pun intended.

And if someone is totally blind from birth, they will still understand that red is a color that is compatible with oranges and browns, but not blues and greens (other than holidays.)

??? Red and brown look horrible together. And there's a lot of times besides holidays that you find red, blue, and green in combination. Tartans being one.

[Magpie]

Yes, actually you can. A great number of blind people do have limited sight, and many more weren't born blind, so both groups will know what "red" is, and you don't need sight to know how long a foot is.

I believe the issue was that it's not a useful description. Yes, they might be able to picture it, but it doesn't help them if they're looking for the item.

[Andara Bledin]

Pretty shitty and patronizing of the manager to do that to the customer. I guess he doesn't know that assume = ass u me.

See, I never liked that phrase, 'cause it seems to include both parties.

I find it's simpler to say that assumptions always start with an ass.

^-.-^