This was from last Thursday (I know, I'm slow, leave me alone, I've been busy). I was dropping my fiance off at the Amtrak station (he has spent the last week helping my mother with some remodeling). As soon as we walked in, this older lady who had been sitting in the waiting area just shouted out "hey, I was next in line" and pushed her way up to the counter. No one in front of us in the line seemed phased, so I just assumed she had asked someone to keep her place so she could sit because it looked like she had difficulty standing, no big deal so far. That was the end of things being just slightly odd to full blown where the hell is Gravekeeper when you need him.
OL- Old Lady
AE- Amtrak employee
AE: Okay ma'am, are you checking in?
OL: No, I need to know where we are.
AE: Ma'am, this is the Salt Lake City Amtrak station, were you waiting for a train?
OL: No, I need to know exactly where we are.
AE: Okay, we are at 355 South 600 West, Salt Lake City, 84111.
OL: That doesn't help me, where are we exactly?
AE: Do you want distance from landmarks? I'm sorry, I'm not entirely sure what you need.
OL: What, can you speek louder, I'm deaf and I can hardly hear you.
AE: I'm sorry ma'am, I'm not exactly sure what you need.
OL: I need to know exactly where I am, can you draw me a quick map of exactly where I am, make it big, I'm blind and can barely see.
AE: (while drawing out a map) We are here on 600 West, the closest cross street is 200 South, we're just east of the freeway...
OL: God, can't Amtrak get people who know anything! What is so difficult about this.
AE: I'm sorry ma'am, but if you could be more specific with what you need, I'm just not sure what you are asking for.
OL: I'm trying to get to China, what's the closest you can get me to China?
AE: Well, we only operate in the United States. Delta has flights from the Salt Lake Airport, or we have service that could take you to either Los Angeles, San Francisco, or Seattle, all of those cities airports would have flights to China as well.
OL: Are you stupid, I can't afford those flights, I want to get to China for cheap.
AE: I'm sorry ma'am, but I don't think that's possible really. And as I said, we only offer service to the United States. So, I can't really help you.
OL: Fine, give me the address to all of the Amtrak stations and I'll figure it out on my own, write them down, make sure to write them big because I'm blind.
AE: Ma'am, it is approaching half an hour before the train is going to arrive, and there is now a line out the door with people waiting to check in. I will write down our phone number and our web site, both of those resources will allow you to find the addresses of the Amtrak stations.
OL: Are you refusing to help me?
AE: No, I was trying to politely hint that you need to get out of my station.
OL: You can't refuse service because I'm blind and deaf.
AE: Let's put it this way, you are interfering with the normal operation of business. Leave now or we will report you for trespassing. If it comes to that, Amtrak does press charges, and corporate has enough of a budget problem that if the train is delayed due to your antics, they will take you to court over the cost of that delay. Keep in mind, this is a long haul train coming in, it has two locomotives and neither of them exactly sips diesal fuel (side note, long haul trains are still the most fuel efficient means of travel, that though does not mean they don't use a lot of fuel), there are two graveyard shift operators pulling in $30 an hour, and half a dozen support crew employees, also graveyard shift pulling in $20 an hour. Also the itenary shows 60 people who have guaranteed connections in Sacramento who we will have to pay hotel rooms for if they miss their connection. You do the math and see if you can afford to pay all that and if you can't get out of the station.
OL: I won't be threatened.
AE: I just pressed 9 and 1 on my phone, you have 5 seconds to start walking before I press the second 1.
OL: You wouldn't throw out a cripple (so, now not just blind and deaf, now a cripple... nice)
AE: (on phone... supposedly) Yes, hello, I need police dispatched to 355 South 600 West in Salt Lake City... yes, the Amtrak Station... yes... yes... we need a trespasser removed...
*OL high tails it out of the station... quite quickly for a cripple I might add.
*the rest of us in line applaud the employee.
That's not the best part, when I got up to the front of the line I mentioned "wow, I will never complain about my customers again... but shouldn't you call dispatch back and tell them that she's gone?"
His response, "I dialed an internal extension, I was talking to the station voicemail the whole time... works every time."
Right on Amtrack dude.
OL- Old Lady
AE- Amtrak employee
AE: Okay ma'am, are you checking in?
OL: No, I need to know where we are.
AE: Ma'am, this is the Salt Lake City Amtrak station, were you waiting for a train?
OL: No, I need to know exactly where we are.
AE: Okay, we are at 355 South 600 West, Salt Lake City, 84111.
OL: That doesn't help me, where are we exactly?
AE: Do you want distance from landmarks? I'm sorry, I'm not entirely sure what you need.
OL: What, can you speek louder, I'm deaf and I can hardly hear you.
AE: I'm sorry ma'am, I'm not exactly sure what you need.
OL: I need to know exactly where I am, can you draw me a quick map of exactly where I am, make it big, I'm blind and can barely see.
AE: (while drawing out a map) We are here on 600 West, the closest cross street is 200 South, we're just east of the freeway...
OL: God, can't Amtrak get people who know anything! What is so difficult about this.
AE: I'm sorry ma'am, but if you could be more specific with what you need, I'm just not sure what you are asking for.
OL: I'm trying to get to China, what's the closest you can get me to China?
AE: Well, we only operate in the United States. Delta has flights from the Salt Lake Airport, or we have service that could take you to either Los Angeles, San Francisco, or Seattle, all of those cities airports would have flights to China as well.
OL: Are you stupid, I can't afford those flights, I want to get to China for cheap.
AE: I'm sorry ma'am, but I don't think that's possible really. And as I said, we only offer service to the United States. So, I can't really help you.
OL: Fine, give me the address to all of the Amtrak stations and I'll figure it out on my own, write them down, make sure to write them big because I'm blind.
AE: Ma'am, it is approaching half an hour before the train is going to arrive, and there is now a line out the door with people waiting to check in. I will write down our phone number and our web site, both of those resources will allow you to find the addresses of the Amtrak stations.
OL: Are you refusing to help me?
AE: No, I was trying to politely hint that you need to get out of my station.
OL: You can't refuse service because I'm blind and deaf.
AE: Let's put it this way, you are interfering with the normal operation of business. Leave now or we will report you for trespassing. If it comes to that, Amtrak does press charges, and corporate has enough of a budget problem that if the train is delayed due to your antics, they will take you to court over the cost of that delay. Keep in mind, this is a long haul train coming in, it has two locomotives and neither of them exactly sips diesal fuel (side note, long haul trains are still the most fuel efficient means of travel, that though does not mean they don't use a lot of fuel), there are two graveyard shift operators pulling in $30 an hour, and half a dozen support crew employees, also graveyard shift pulling in $20 an hour. Also the itenary shows 60 people who have guaranteed connections in Sacramento who we will have to pay hotel rooms for if they miss their connection. You do the math and see if you can afford to pay all that and if you can't get out of the station.
OL: I won't be threatened.
AE: I just pressed 9 and 1 on my phone, you have 5 seconds to start walking before I press the second 1.
OL: You wouldn't throw out a cripple (so, now not just blind and deaf, now a cripple... nice)
AE: (on phone... supposedly) Yes, hello, I need police dispatched to 355 South 600 West in Salt Lake City... yes, the Amtrak Station... yes... yes... we need a trespasser removed...
*OL high tails it out of the station... quite quickly for a cripple I might add.
*the rest of us in line applaud the employee.
That's not the best part, when I got up to the front of the line I mentioned "wow, I will never complain about my customers again... but shouldn't you call dispatch back and tell them that she's gone?"
His response, "I dialed an internal extension, I was talking to the station voicemail the whole time... works every time."
Right on Amtrack dude.
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